Even with both windows open, the air was hot, still, as if the world had stopped breathing. My back was damp against the sheets. It seemed impossible that only this morning when I woke I was lying on a bed of grass with Kazi nestled against my chest, a chain still connecting us.
It was well after midnight and I should have been passed out in my bed with exhaustion by now, but instead I tossed and turned and pacedโin one of the guest rooms. Oleez had been afraid to tell me. I was finally back at Torโs Watch and shut out of my own room.
I could have easily had Kazi moved, but there were other battles ahead and this one wasnโt worth fightingโand strangely, some part of me liked the idea of her being in my room. I wasnโt sure why. This room was larger, more comfortable, meant to impress guests, and I knew by now she had probably explored everyย thingย in my room. What did she think? Had she gone through my books searching for the stories I shared with her? Rummaged through my clothes? The forgotten clutter in the bottom of my wardrobe? There were three knives that I could remember. I suspected she already had one on her. I wasnโt worried. Had she taken another bath? I saw the revulsion in her face when Titus threw the ears on the table. After she left, I grabbed him by the collar and threw him up against the wall.ย Donโt ever do that again, I had told him.ย We may have dirty work to do, but everyone doesnโt need to see it.ย Especially not her. I had seen her expression
โthe fearโwhen she thought I had harmed her friends. Killed them. The
terror in her eyes had whittled through me like a dull knife. She had seen something in my face, maybe all of our faces. She knew death when she saw it.
The harm I actually did do hadnโt been hard for me, and I would do it again.
Foley had come to tell me what had happened.
When Mason, Gunner, Titus, and I walked into the warehouse, Lothar and Rancell already had them on their knees. Tiago and Drake hovered nearby.
โWe spotted their wagon in an alley,โ Rancell said. โWhen we lifted the tarp we saw the brewerโs boy gagged and chained. The other chains were still empty. They hadnโt gotten the rest of their cargo yet.โ
I stepped closer to the three men. Two of them began crying, begging for mercy. The third said nothing, but sweat beaded on his forehead. They were a more ragged crew than the ones who had taken Kazi and me. Their tattered clothing was ripe with stench, their knuckles creased with filth, but their story was the same. Theyโd been paid up front, but they didnโt know by whom. The fellow who approached them with a fat purse wore a wide-brimmed hat pulled low, and they werenโt even sure what color his hair was.
โWhich of you took the money?โ I asked. โHe did,โ the two sniveling ones cried.
I looked at the silent one, his sweat the only indication he knew the gravity of his situation. My hatred for him rose to a different level. It was personal. The brewerโs boy was fourteen.
โSo youโre in charge?โ He nodded.
โHave you done this before?โ
โNot here. Other places. Itโs good money. But he said it had to be Hellโs Mouth andโโ
โYou know whose town this is?โ I asked.
He swallowed, his expression suddenly crackling with eagerness. โIโll give you a cut,โ he said. โWe can make a deal. Half. You want half? Half for doing nothing.โ
โYou know what would have happened to the boy you grabbed?โ
โA mine. He would have worked in a mine. Thatโs all. Good hard work.โ
There was nothing good about dying in a mine. Nothing good about being shackled and hauled in the back of a wagon against your will. He couldnโt conceive that the brewerโs boy had a life, a future. He only saw him as an article of profit. I drew my knife.
โAll. You can have it all,โ he pleaded. โThe moneyโs in my vest. Take
it.โ
โAll of it?โ I stepped closer and knelt so we were eye to eye. โThatโs
quite a deal youโre offering, but Iโm in a hurry, so hereโs a better one. Iโll kill you quickly instead of letting my dogs tear you to piecesโwhich is what you deserve.โ I wasnโt sure the words had even registered before I plunged my knife into his throat. Blood sprayed my shirt and face, and he was dead before I had pulled my knife free.
I stood and my attention turned to the other two. They began wailing, trying to back away on their knees, but Mason and Titus stood behind them, preventing them from going anywhere.
โWant me to do those two?โ Tiago asked.
I walked over, as if studying them. โMaybe not,โ I said. โMaybe theyโd be more useful to us as messengers. Would you two rather be dead or deliver a message?โ
โA message!โ they both agreed. โPlease, any message! Weโll deliver it.โ
I motioned to Mason and Titus. They jerked their heads back by their hair and in a swift second, an ear from each man was on the ground in front of them. Their screams bounced off the walls of the warehouse, but when I told them to shut up, they did. They had already witnessed what else could happen to them.
โBetter. Now hereโs the message. You go back to whatever hole you crawled out of, and you let everyone get a good long look at your ears, and you let them know who did itโthe Ballengersโand you tell them that this is the kind of trouble theyโll find in Hellโs Mouth, and no amount of money that anyone offers them is worth it. The citizens of this city are off-limits. And if I ever see either of you here again, even for a sip of water, weโll be cutting off something much more valuable to you than your ears. My word is good. You can count on it. Understand?โ
They both nodded.
โGood. Our business is done, then.โ
I looked at Lothar and Rancell. โGet them bandaged up. I donโt want them bleeding out before they deliver our message.โ
It was on our way back to the main house that Gunner said it was time for other messages to be sent too, the one my whole family was pushing for, and now I finally agreed. We had nothing to lose. Or so I thought.
I still couldnโt quite believe that to make good on my promise to my father, I had also agreed to rebuild a Vendan settlement. If the gods had carried that news to his ears, he was probably beating on his tomb walls, demanding to be let out, demanding to name someone else asย Patrei.
I rolled out of bed and went to the window. It was dark, the work yard below quiet, a dim bluish light in the gate tower the only sign that anyone was awake, and then I saw a shadow moving through the blackness. Or I thought I did. It was just as quickly gone. Maybe one of the dogs patrolling. Barking erupted but quickly quieted again. Yes, only the dogs.
I stepped away from the window, paced, and wondered if she was having as hard a time sleeping as I was. I remembered her face when I came to her chamber, at first soft, happy to see me, but then it turned sharp.
What do you want, Jase?
I knew what I wanted. She did too.
* * *
My hand hovered as I debated whether I should knock. It was late. The middle of the night. If she was asleep, I would wake her.
Sheโs not asleep.ย I knew it was impossible, but I sensed it. I could feel her eyes open, scanning the walls, pulling the drapes shut, opening them again, watchful, unable to rest, needing a story, a riddle, something to ease her into a dreamworld. I rested my hand against the door wanting to go in, knowing I shouldnโt.
What is this, Kazi? What do you feel?
She couldnโt answer me before when I had asked. Or she wouldnโt.
Maybe it was best not to know. Her loyalties were clear.
And so were mine.
I pushed away from the door and walked back to my room.
* * *
Candles glowed in red glass globes in the apse of the temple, and the heavy scent of amber hung in the air. I was the only one inside. The priests were asleep in the manse. They would find my offering in the morning. I took out my knife and nicked my thumb, squeezed it, letting the blood drip onto the plate of coins below me.ย A coin for every child in the city. This is only between you and the gods, Jase. Not the priests. Nor anyone else. This is your promise to protect them with your blood, just as Aaron gave with his blood to save the Remnant. Gold pleases men, but blood serves the gods, because in the end, your life is all you have to give.
The drops of blood trickled down the pile of coins and they shifted, a bare clink, echoing through the silent temple. My fatherโs last desperate words were ones he had heard from his own father, words everyย Patreiย heard. I had read them in the histories and transcribed them at an early age.
The candlelight caught the glint of my gold ring.ย I gave it to you when it mattered.ย She had stepped forward willingly and helped me, and instead of thanking her, I questioned why she hadnโt given it to me sooner. Everything was more complicated now, even something as simple as gratitude.
Footsteps scuffled behind me. โYou ready?โ
Mason had caught me on my way out and insisted on coming with me.
You lost your mind? Leaving withoutย straza?ย And then he laughed.ย Letโs go.
He walked down the center aisle toward me and whispered, โThe town will be waking soon. We should go while itโs still dark.โ
We left, the streets silent, the roads dark. Halfway home he asked about Kazi. โHow did you two end up beingโฆโ
He knew something had happened between us, but he stumbled with the rest of his question, as if he didnโt know how to craft itโas if he was still not quite believing it himself. He had seen her slam me up against the wall, threaten to cut me. He hadnโt taken it any better than I had.
โIt was different out there,โ I said. โShe was different. So was I.โ โWhat about now?โ
โI donโt know.โ
โIโve never seen you like this. I know youโre not asking for advice, but Iโm offering it anyway. She might have been nice to curl up with out there,
but back here sheโs not someone you want to get tangled up with. She canโt be trusted.โ
I hated to hear him say it, but it was true. Kazi had secrets. She performed a skillful dance around everything we said. Last night I had seen genuine fear in her eyes when she thought I had hurt her friends, but then I saw how she played us too, the fear dissolving and being replaced by something skilled and calculating. It was the same look I had seen in her face when she had studied the driver, like in her head she was constructing something solid, stone by stone. Her shrewdness managed to get reparations we didnโt owe out of the deal. Even with her letter we had no guarantee the queen would come, but there was hope and that was a short-term bandage we needed. Iโd use it to my advantage for now. Soon we wouldnโt need anyone tossing us crumbs of respect. Soon weโd have a greater share of trade on the continent, and it would be the kingdoms begging for a place at the table with the Ballengers.
We reached Torโs Watch, but before Mason left to go back to his room and catch what little sleep was left of the dark morning hours, I said, โTomorrow when we go into town, pull Garvin from tower security and put him on her watch. She doesnโt know him, and he melts into the background. Add Yursan as a decoy too.โ
Masonโs brows rose. A decoy tail, especially for someone like Garvin who was good at what he did, was a grand admission of my doubts.
I hoped Mason was wrong. I hoped I was wrong. Because I was still tangled up with her and I didnโt want to be cut loose.
Miandre is our storyteller. She tells us stories of before.
It was a world of princesses and monsters, and castles and courage. She learned the stories from her friendโs mother. Someday I will tell the stories too, but my stories will be about different monsters, the ones that visit us every day.