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Chapter no 23 – ODDLY COMFORTING

Phantasma (Wicked Games, #1)

NIGHT FOUR OF PHANTASMA
Blackwell was leaning against the dresser watching as Ophelia paced back and forth through her room. She had already explained the entire ordeal of her sisterโ€™s diaries in excruciating detailโ€”more detail than he probably wanted, but he was patient enough not to complainโ€”and now she was trying to connect those pieces with what they had just found.

โ€œGabriel is a common name,โ€ Blackwell reasoned.

โ€œMy sister was secretly harboring an obsession with Phantasma for years and wrote that she needed to find someone named Gabriel, and then we find the name Gabriel carved into a floorboard within Phantasma, and you think I should write it off as a common name?โ€ she said in disbelief.

โ€œPoint taken,โ€ he allowed. โ€œBut thereโ€™s nothing more you can figure out tonight. Why donโ€™t you get some rest and Iโ€™ll see if I can track down one of the Devils and find out where the contestant logs are kept?โ€

She perked up. โ€œContestant logs?โ€

Blackwell nodded. โ€œYes. The Devils are vigilant about keeping track of every soul that comes through here, but they donโ€™t share that sort of information with just anyone. Iโ€™ll have to see what I can do. If anything.โ€

โ€œPlease,โ€ she whispered. โ€œPlease try.โ€

He pushed away from the dresser to place his hands on her shoulder, turning her around and ushering her to the bed. โ€œI will. Now, get some sleep. Youโ€™re going to need it for the next level.โ€

She pulled back her comforter and tucked herself beneath, still wearing his shirt from earlier. The material was luxurious and soft against her skin and, best of all, it smelled like him. Vanilla and tobacco. It was becoming oddly comforting.

He stretched the blankets up around her shoulders and made to turn away, but she reached out and snagged his hand. โ€œAre you leaving? What if thereโ€™s a haunt in the middle of the night?โ€

โ€œI can stay until you fall asleep,โ€ he told her, gently tugging his hand out of hers to take up residence in the armchair a few feet away.

Closing her eyes, she tried to force herself to go to sleep. But it was no use. Her mind was racing. Thinking about Genevieve and the mysterious Gabriel and what it could all possibly mean. Thinking about Blackwellโ€™s lips on hers. Which turned to thinking about what led them to that moment in the first place. Acid burning through her clothing, the next trial of torture she would soon have to endure. It was all enough to keep her awake for the rest of her life.

And then, right on schedule, the Shadow Voice made its nightly appearance.

You need to knock on the headboard, it told her. Three sets of threes. Then name the people you want to keep safe through the night. Or theyโ€™ll all die. Every last one.

As discreetly as she could, she reached over her head to tap her knuckles against the headboard. One, two, three. One, two, three. One, two, three.

โ€œGenevieve,โ€ she whispered to herself.

โ€œWhat are you doing?โ€ Blackwell wondered softly.

Damn it. Not subtle enough.

Her mother and Genevieve were the only two people who had ever known about the extensive list that was the Shadow Voiceโ€™s nighttime ritual. And not because she had told themโ€”more that they had spent every single night witnessing it for themselves. Something about it had always deeply embarrassed her. To be at the mercy of knocking on her headboard or wall or doing whatever other ridiculous tasks the voice demanded of her just so it would shut up and she could sleep without the ominous blanket of existential dread.

โ€œI was pleasing my inner demons,โ€ she finally said, only half joking.

โ€œAnything I can do to vanquish them, so you can go to sleep?โ€ he offered.

The genuineness in his tone made her chest tighten with an emotion she had never felt before and couldnโ€™t quite name.

โ€œIf only,โ€ she whispered. โ€œBesides, if all of my inner demons were destroyed, there wouldnโ€™t be much left of me.โ€

He was silent for a long moment. Then, โ€œNothing is going to hurt you while Iโ€™m here, Ophelia. Rest.โ€

She took a deep breath and sank further into the mattress, counting the heartbeats pulsing from her locketโ€”which had not let up since their kiss. Soon enough the necklace and the steady buzz of Blackwellโ€™s energy lulled her deeper and deeper into subconsciousness, and she finally let go.

The next morning, Blackwell was nowhere to be found, but Poe was curled up beside her, purring in contentment. Ophelia patted the catโ€™s ghostly head before stretching out her limbs and getting ready for the day. She decided on a simple white chiffon gown and strapless front-lacing corset. Both relatively easy to move in.

The clock on the wall told her there were still hours before dinner, and that meant she had plenty of time to sneak back to the secret room before she and Blackwell crossed paths again. She wanted to go inspect it by herself and take a moment to grieve the fallacy she had been living: her belief that she knew Genevieve better than anyone in the world. Genevieve certainly knew her better than anyone else. At least, before Phantasma. Now, Ophelia felt they were strangers to one another. Maybe that was a bit dramatic, but the hurt that had been hiding beneath the adrenaline of the past few days was finally working its way to the surface, and it heightened every hue of betrayal in her mind.

Ophelia was running around making blood bargains with Ghosts, getting bitten by venomous serpents, and risking her life every night, and it probably never even crossed Genevieveโ€™s mind that Ophelia would dare come after her.

Which perhaps wasnโ€™t giving Genevieve enough credit, but at this point Ophelia had no idea what her sister could be thinking. The worst part was that right now, Ophelia wanted nothing more than to just speak to Vivi. Despite the secrets, their fight, or the ire Ophelia had for Genevieveโ€™s impulsive nature, she desperately wanted to know that her sister was safe. And to tell her everything. What she had been through inside Phantasma, how strange her new magic felt, the weird pulsing of the locket, andโ€”most of allโ€”Blackwell.

She wanted to tell Vivi about their ill-advised bargain and how infuriating she thought the Phantom was. She wanted to tell her about the annoying way he gave her half-answers to every single question and made her want to stab him, just for him to turn around and save her life or make her laugh. And she absolutely, desperately, wanted to tell her sister about the mind-blowing way he touched her, how intoxicating his kisses were and how one erotic encounter with the Ghost made her realize that maybe she wasnโ€™t broken after all. The complete opposite of how Elliott had made her feel during their brief affair.

Part of her was devastated she couldnโ€™t experience Blackwell that way ever again. Not unless she wanted to be a hypocrite.

What makes you think heโ€™d ever want to experience you that way again? the Shadow Voice hissed. Youโ€™re pathetic, undesirable. Youโ€™re creepy. He probably thought the way you acted last night was embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing.

โ€œStop!โ€ she cried aloud, slamming her hands against her forehead as if she could physically dislodge the voice from her mind. But it wouldnโ€™t stop. The word looped on repeat until Ophelia was practically ripping the hair from her scalp.

Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassโ โ€”

โ€œOphelia,โ€ a deep voice said.

The Shadow Voice slinked off into the depths of her mind and finally it was quiet.

Blackwell was suddenly there, gently prying her hands from her hair. โ€œWhatโ€™s going on?โ€

โ€œIt wouldnโ€™t stop,โ€ she groaned.

โ€œWhat wouldnโ€™t stop?โ€ he pressed.

โ€œThe Shadow Voice,โ€ she gritted out, squeezing her hands into fists to resist the urge to plunge them back into her disheveled tresses. โ€œIt kept telling me I was embarrassing last nightโ€”when we, you knowโ€”and it wouldnโ€™t stop. Over and over and over and over and overโ โ€”โ€

โ€œHey. Look at me.โ€

She hadnโ€™t even realized her eyes were closed.

โ€œTake a deep breath,โ€ he instructed when she finally opened her eyes. โ€œIn. Out.โ€

She did as he said.

โ€œAgain.โ€

In. Out.

โ€œOne more time.โ€

In. Out.

โ€œYou have nothing to be embarrassed about,โ€ he vowed. โ€œNext time your mind tries to convince you otherwise, remember this: there is nothing about you that I find undesirable. Okay?โ€

She looked away. She never wanted to believe something more.

You canโ€™t, though, can you? The Shadow Voice laughed. They are just pretty words from a pretty face. You can believe me, though, little Necromancer.

โ€œOphelia,โ€ Blackwell called her back. โ€œEvery time your eyes glaze over like thatโ€ฆ where do you go?โ€

โ€œNowhere,โ€ she lied.

His eyes narrowed. โ€œWho is the Shadow Voice?โ€

Her blood froze at the sound of someone else naming the insidious entity in her head. She couldnโ€™t speak. She didnโ€™t know what to say, and even if she did, she didnโ€™t want to explain something so intimate to him, afraid it would make her break down. The panic in her eyes must have been blatant because he decided to let it go, changing the subject.

โ€œI made a deal with Jasper,โ€ he informed her. โ€œWeโ€™ll be able to see the contestant logs soon.โ€

She sucked in a surprised breath. โ€œThat easy?โ€

He grimaced. โ€œI wouldnโ€™t say easy. But itโ€™s done.โ€

โ€œWhat did you promise him?โ€

He shook his head. โ€œNothing savory. Donโ€™t worry about it.โ€

She heaved a sigh. โ€œWell, when can we see them?โ€

โ€œIn about an hour, so we have some time to kill.โ€

She couldnโ€™t mention that she had intended to sneak off to the secret corridor without him. She would just have to table that idea for another time.

She grabbed her brush and began smoothing out her tangled curls. โ€œWhat would you suggest we do to bide our time?โ€

A wicked smirk. โ€œNothing that involves keeping our clothes on.โ€

โ€œPlease donโ€™t make this hard.โ€

The smirk grew into a full-blown grin. โ€œWell, technically youโ€™re the oneโ โ€”โ€

โ€œIf you are about to make some ridiculous innuendo involving the word hardโ€โ€”she pointed at him with the hairbrushโ€”โ€œswallow your tongue.โ€

He made a show of sighing heavily as if not getting to finish his joke was deeply inconvenient for him. โ€œFine. How about we use this time for something Iโ€™ve been wanting to addressโ€”your magic.โ€

She inclined her head. โ€œWhat about my magic?โ€

โ€œYou need to learn how to wield it better, control it. Itโ€™s driving me mad watching you waste so much of it. Plus, I want you to learn how to control your little disappearing act before the next few levels.โ€

โ€œI think Iโ€™ll pass. Iโ€™m not sure I could tolerate you as a teacher. And what exactly does the next level entail?โ€

โ€œA lot of death if you donโ€™t utilize every advantage,โ€ he said.

โ€œHelpful as ever,โ€ she quipped.

โ€œWell, Iโ€™m trying to be helpful, and youโ€™re being difficult,โ€ he countered. โ€œThe first two trials were childโ€™s play compared to whatโ€™s coming next. I can only help so much within some of these levels. The rest will be on you. I want that to be a hopeful prospectโ€”not a risky one.โ€

โ€œAw.โ€ She pressed a mocking hand to her chest. โ€œAre you saying youโ€™d be sad if I were to get maimed or die?โ€

He gave her an odd, inscrutable look. โ€œTell me, angel, do you believe me to be heartless?โ€

The gravity of his tone made her squirm a bit, but she only pointed out, โ€œTechnically, you are heartless.โ€

โ€œUntil you successfully complete our bargain, of course,โ€ he said. A clever joke considering the items they were searching for. โ€œRight?โ€

She wasnโ€™t sure where he was going with this. โ€œYesโ€ฆโ€

โ€œThen let me train you so you donโ€™t end up perishing tragically,โ€ he pressed.

โ€œFine. I suppose your tutoring cannot possibly be worse than whatever creative death the next level has planned.โ€

Blackwell laughed. โ€œThatโ€™s the spirit.โ€

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