It was silly how just the sight of a top hat had the power to make Tellaโs heart pound.
She both loved and hated the effect that Legend had on her. She had never wanted anyone to have power over her like this.
Tella could still remember how Legend had looked the morning after their first kiss. They had both fallen asleep on the forest floor, but not even a blade of grass had clung to his polished boots the next day. Dressed in inky shades of black, without even so much as a loose cravat, Legend had looked like a dark wingless angel that had been tossed from the heavens and landed on his feet.
She had thought that at some point her impression of him would change, that eventually heโd seem less perfect, less untouchableโless like an ephemeral dark dream that you werenโt supposed to fall in love with, the kind of dangerous dream that easily could break her if he wishedโnow that she had let down her guard and opened up her heart.
She didnโt believe Legend planned to break her today.
Yet Tella felt incredibly fragile as they stood in front of Mr. Garlandโs Toy Chest. She was on the crisp sidewalk and he was in the cobbled street. She told herself not to look at his hands, not to check if he had any packages.
But she couldnโt help herself. She looked at his hands.
Empty and empty.
Quickly she snuck a look in the direction of his pockets, to see if she detected the outline of a small box.
There was nothing.
There was only Legend, dressed in all black, from the silk cravat around his neck to the tips of his polished black boots. Tella had a fleeting thought that the phraseย tall, dark, and handsomeย needed to be changed toย tall, dark, and Legend.
Once again, her heartbeat pattered, fast and hard. Her lips ached as she waited for him to lean in.โฆ
Glittering snowflakes swirled around them, making it the perfect moment for kissing. Although, Tella genuinely believed that almost every moment was perfect for kissing.
Kisses were perfect ways to say hello and goodbye. Kisses were perfect for thank-yous.
Kisses were excellent for celebrating, and they were even better for taking away pain.
Speaking of pain, Tellaโs lips continued to ache as she waited for Legend to kiss her hello.
He smiled at her slowly, one corner of his mouth leisurely hitching up. But he didnโt move any closer to her. And after a few aching seconds, Tella felt that it was too late for her to move closer to him.
Legend hadnโt outright rejected her attempt to kiss him, since she hadnโt actually made a true attempt at a kiss. But the most perfect moment for kissing had passed and he hadnโt tried to kiss her โฆ which made her feel as if she should not try to kiss him now.
Tella told herself she was being utterly ridiculous. She told herself just to kiss him already, if thatโs what she wanted. He had given up immortality for her.
But was it just her imagination, or was Legend looking a little more immortal now?
Legend was the stupid kind of handsome that usually made girlsโand a number of boysโlose their senses just a little bit if they got too close. He had one of those jaws that was perfectly sharp and strong. A jaw that said,
Hello there, I know you want to touch me. I know you want to trace me with your finger and then maybe with your lips.
Which Tella had done before.
She knew Legend well enough to know there was definitely extra magic clinging to him now.
She thought she might have been imagining it before, because of his handsomeness and his Legendness, and the way his bronze skin always seemed to shimmer. But those were things that were always there.
There was something else there now โฆ something Tella couldnโt quite put her finger on. Possibly, in part, because her fingers were growing numb as she and Legend stood there in the snowย not kissing.
And so, Tella did what she always did when she felt nervous or scared or any other emotion that she didnโt particularly want to deal with.
She decided to flee.
โAs glad as I am to see you, my love, Iโm afraid that I donโt have time to dally on the street.โ She turned to go.
Legend grabbed her wrist and spun her back around to face him. Her blood rushed from the combination of his touch and the spinning and the consuming sudden nearness as he asked, โWhere are you going off to so fast?โ
Iโm leaving because you didnโt kiss me,ย she thought. But she said, โNone of your business.โ
โYou are always my business, Donatella.โ Legendโs hand slowly moved up her arm and under her cloak, sparking as he traced the bare skin between her glove and her sleeve.
She might have thought he was trying to torment her. But he always had this effect on her.
Tella used to think that kisses were like copper coins, things to be used for quick bits of fun. Then she had kissed Legend.
Kissing Legend hadnโt been fun. It had feltย essential.ย Before that night, Tellaโs basic needs had consisted of eating and breathing and sleeping. Then the list had changed to eating and breathing and sleeping and kissing Legendโs lips.
Even now, although they werenโt kissing at all, she was melting under his touch.
Yet he remained perfectly cool as he said, โAre you running away to buy me a gift?โ
Tella smoothed her features into something that she hoped was fetchingly demure and collected. โYou really think everything is about you.โ
โOnly because it usually is.โ He smirked.
It was an unfairly beautiful smirk. The kind of smirk that would have made a glorious smile if he had been just a little less cocky.
Tella shook her head. โYou think far too highly of yourself.โ
The look in Legendโs dark eyes changed. If it were anyone else, Tella would have said there was a twinkle. But twinkles werenโt supposed to make people nervous, and this glimmering, magical look made her quite anxious.
โI find that amusing coming from the girl who begged her sister to change the date of a holiday because she was afraid she couldnโt getย meย a nice enough gift.โ
Tella felt her cheeks burn red. Silently she cursed Julian, knowing he must have been the one who told Legend of her dilemma.
โI have no idea what youโre talking about,โ she lied.
She told herself to pull away from his hand. But he looked as if he suddenly had something important to tell her.
โYou donโt have to get me a gift, Donatella. Iโm not really much for the Great Holiday.โ Legend turned down his mouth as a horse jingled past pulling a sleigh full of carolers singing about a runaway present. โI thought I told you that,โ he said softly.
โI know you said that,โ Tella said. โBut I still wanted to get you something. Iโโ
This might have been an excellent time for her to tell Legend that she loved him and she wanted to show it to him with a perfect gift.
But one of the many mistakes Tella had recently made was to purchase and read a booklet titledย How Not to Lose the Love of Your Life.
The book was full of terrible advice.
Tella knew this, even as she read it. But that didnโt stop her from reading it cover to cover and then latching on to some of the authorโs โwisdoms.โ
Beware of saying โI love you.โ Donโt say it too soon.
Donโt say it first.
Donโt say it at the wrong time.
And suddenly this felt like the wrong time.
And so instead of telling Legend she loved him, Tella found herself hastily saying, โYour brother told me everything was a game with you, including gifts.โ
โJulian says a lot of things.โ Legendโs frown deepened. He didnโt say anything else about gifts.
But as Tella watched him, she was fairly certain she knew what he was thinking.
Legend hadnโt gotten her any type of gift at all. When heโd told her that he wasnโt much for the Great Holiday, heโd really been saying that he didnโt like it all, and he hoped she didnโt expect him to celebrate with her.
It was just what sheโd feared.
Tella could feel her heart sinking as she stood there on the snowy sidewalk. She tried not to let it show. She didnโt want him to go out now and get her a gift out of pity or fear. She wanted one given to her out of love. She didnโt even care what it was, as long as it was from Legendโs heart.
But standing there now, watching as his expression continued to shutter, Tella feared heโd done something to his heart. That heโd locked it in an iron box as if it were a maiden in a tower whom he didnโt want anyone to touch.
โI should leave.โ Legend dropped her hand. His face was unreadable as he pulled away.
โWhere are you going?โ she asked.
โI have work to do for the next Caraval.โ
โBut itโs Great Holiday Eve Eve. Do you really need to work today?โ she asked. Then, of course, she felt immediately foolish.
Inย How Not to Lose the Love of Your Life,ย it said,ย You should never have to ask for anything. Men should be able to read your mind.
Again, she knew in her heart it was bad advice. But the little booklet was currently in her pocket. Another one of her bad decisions was to carry it around with her, and maybe she couldnโt help but think that maybe its words were a little bit true.โฆ
If Legend was truly her true love, wouldnโt he know that she wanted him to choose her over Caraval? And that she wanted a Holiday gift? Despite the fact he wasnโt much for the Holiday?
โIโm very sorry, Tella, but there are some urgent things I need to take care of outside of the city. I only came to find you here to tell you that Iโll try to make it back in time for your sisterโs ball tomorrow.โ