Sheโs here. Sheโs safe.
I repeated the words in my head as I held Stella tight.
Tiny shivers rippled through her body, and even though she was almost as tall as me, she felt fragile. Breakable.
Fierce protectiveness burned in my chest.
โItโs all right, sweetheart,โ I murmured. โYouโre okay.
Youโre safe.โ
She buried her face deeper in my neck, her soft sobs twisting my heart like a wrung-out rag.
I was holding her again for the first time in weeks, but this wasnโt how Iโd wanted it to be.
Not with her bruised, hurt, and terrified.
The relief Iโd felt at seeing her alive gave way to renewed rage.
My cold gaze found Julian over Stellaโs shoulder.
He glared back at me, his eyes filled with hatred, but he didnโt say a word as Steele and Mason secured him with restraints.
Iโd recognized Julianโs face from hisย Washington Weeklyย bio. I also recognized it from the background check Iโd run on his grandmother when she first bought her apartment at the Mirage. After she died, the property passed to him.
I didnโt involve myself in the mundane details of tenant turnover, so I hadnโt connected that detail.
No wonder thereโd been no evidence of him leaving the Mirage after he broke into Stellaโs apartment. Heโd been inside it the whole time.
โKeep him alive,โ I said. โIโll deal with him personally.โ
I wanted the pleasure of tearing the bastard apart myself.
However, a glimmer of pride sparked in my chest when I saw the nasty wound on his neck. Stella mustโve taken a chunk out of him before we arrived.
Thatโs my girl.
Steele nodded. โYou got it.โ
Weโd tracked Julian down via the credit card heโd used for his car rental, then tracked the car to this shittastic cabin in the Virginia woods. The carโs built-in GPS made that easy.
I hadnโt wanted to take any chances, so Iโd called in a handful of men to accompany me and dispatched another to get Brock.
Julian mustโve drugged him and Stella with different substancesโone to incapacitate Brock and get him out of the room, the other to disorient her.
I wanted nothing more than to flay him alive, but Stella took priority.
I rubbed a hand over her back. โWeโll check into a hotel and get you cleaned up,โ I murmured. โI have a doctor who can meet us there and take a look at your wounds.โ
I hated hospitals. All that fucking paperwork and lax security. It was easier to take care of her myself.
When she gave a tiny, silent nod, I left my men to deal with the mess in the cabin and gently guided her into my car.
My anger flared again at the sight of her cuts and bruises in bright daylight, but I tamped it down.
Later.ย Once I made sure she was okay, I could take all the time I wanted dismantling Julian.
Stella didnโt speak as I pulled away from the cabin.
I wanted to take her back to my apartment, but I didnโt want to violate the boundaries sheโd established during our breakup.
However, when we arrived at the nearest decent hotel, she didnโt budge from the car.
She stared at the entrance, her knuckles white around her knees.
โCan we go to your house instead?โ she asked quietly. โI want to be somewhere safe.โ
My heart roared to life, but I kept my voice even. โOf course.โ
Dr. Abelson was already waiting for us when we arrived at the Mirage. He was technically retired, but one of my clients had referred me to him years ago when Iโd mentioned needing a private, discreet doctor.
Apparently, Abelson needed something other than golf and television to pass the time during retirement.
I didnโt need the other residents asking questions, so I took us through the back entrance up to my penthouse.
I had a special room set aside for medical treatment, and I watched impatiently as Abelson introduced himself to Stella and checked her injuries.
โIs she okay?โ I demanded after an interminable length of time that was in reality less than thirty minutes.
โShe has a few cuts and bruises, plus a mild concussion, but sheโll be fine,โ he said. โNothing time and rest wonโt heal.โ
The diagnosis shouldโve placated me, but all I focused on was the wordย concussion.
I mentally added another fifteen minutes to my time with Julian.
โIโll do it,โ I said when he moved to bandage one of her cuts. โYou can leave. Thank you.โ
Other than a small lift of his eyebrows, Abelson didnโt react to my request.
โDo I want to know what happened?โ he asked as he packed his bag. He kept his voice low
Stella sat on the far side of the room. Sheโd been silent during her examination, but that didnโt mean she couldnโt hear us.
โNo.โ He was on call to handle medical issues, but I kept him out of the loop on how, exactly, those issues arose.
โThatโs what I figured.โ He shook his head. โCall me if any complications arise. I donโt anticipate they will, but you have my number.โ
That was why I liked Abelson. He was discreet, competent, and didnโt ask unnecessary questions.
After he left, I finished bandaging Stellaโs cuts.
The tips of my fingers skimmed her skin as I gently pressed the bandages over her wounds. The steady hum of the air conditioner mingled with our soft breaths, and an electric current wound my muscles tight until I finished my ministrations.
โIf youโre hungry, I can make us food,โ I said.
She shook her head. โI just want to shower and sleep.โ
I didnโt argue. Instead, I guided her to the hallway and stopped between the guest room and my bedroom.
I shouldnโt ask. I knew it might cross boundaries again, and that she might not be ready. But I had to try.
โStay with me.โ I softened the words into a request, not an order. โJust for tonight. Please.โ
We were in the safety of my penthouse, but it wasnโt enough.
Iโd almost lost her, and I needed her close.
I needed to see her, touch her, comfort her. Reassure myself she was actually there and not a figment of my imagination.
Only then could I breathe.
An eternity of a second passed, followed by a small nod, sweet relief, and theย clickย of my bedroom door closing behind us.
Stella and I took turns showering.
Sheโd moved all her belongings into Avaโs house, so I gave her one of my old shirts to wear.
The sight of her in my clothing tugged at my heart.
It didnโt mean she forgave me or that we were back together. Sheโd gone through a traumatizing experience, and her actions now werenโt indicative of her regular behavior.
But it was progress, and Iโd take anything I could get. โHow did you find me?โ she asked as I slid into bed next
to her.
Sheโd regained some of her color after the shower, and she was making conversation again.
More progress.
Another tingle of relief eased my tension.
โBrock texted me, and I saw him on the cafeโs security footage.โ I gave her a quick rundown of what happened, leaving out the part about Kage and the junkyard.
โWill he be okay?โ
Stellaย wouldย be worried about someone else when she was the one whoโd been abducted.
The corner of my mouth kicked up. โYes. Heโll be fine with some rest.โ
โGood.โ She half faced me with one hand tucked beneath her cheek.
Despite what sheโd said about wanting to sleep, she seemed reluctant to do so.
โTalk to me, Butterfly. Whatโs on your mind?โ โWell, Iโve had an exciting day.โ
Another smile crossed my lips. Jokes, no matter how dry, were always a good sign.
โBut I donโt want to talk about what happened right now.โ She shifted so she faced me fully. โTell me a story.โ
โA fairytale?โ I teased.
She shook her head. โSomething real.โ
I thought about it before my smile gradually faded. โHow real do you want, Stella?โ
โAs real as it gets.โ Her voice softened. โTell me a story about you.โ
I was quiet for a moment before I spoke again.
โI told you about my father and how my parents died. What I didnโt tell you was what my mom left behind.โ The words came out faded, like furniture webbed with dust after being hidden for so long. โIt was a goodbye note.โ
The police found it on the scene. My aunt hadnโt wanted me to see it, but Iโd insisted.
I still remembered how it smelled, like ink and my momโs favorite perfume. My skin had still been warm from the afternoon sun, but I hadnโt been able to stop shivering when I read the note.
โShe told me how much she loved me and didnโt want to leave me, but that she had no choice. That she couldnโt live without my father and that her sister would take care of me.โ
A bitter smile touched my lips. โImagine telling your child youย lovedย them before you left them all alone in the world. Knowing theyโd lose the only parent they had left because you couldnโt stick around long enough to evenย try?ย Itโd been two days. That was it. I wasnโt sad when I read that letter, Stella. I wasย angry,ย and I was glad about that, because anger is easier than abandonment.โ
โBut my mom also left something else behind. Her one attempt at painting. She loved art, but she was a terrible artist, and even my father couldnโt lie and tell her it was good. We put it in the basement, but after she died, I dug it up and held onto it. I didnโt know why. Maybe because I resented what art had done to my family, and I liked seeing its ugliness and chaos immortalized on canvas. I had her note as well, and when I was older, I reworked the frame and placed it inside the painting. The most fucked up part was, I named it after her.ย Magda.โ
โYes,โ I said when Stellaโs eyes widened. โThe sameย Magdaย you heard me talking about with Dante. I shouldโve tossed both the painting and the note out long ago, but I couldnโt bring myself to do it. It wasnโt the items themselves. It was what they symbolizedโwhat my parents did and how they abandoned me. I hatedย Magda, yet she was the most important thing in my life. Enough so that I had it under guard. I even forged documents saying itโs this priceless piece of art so no one would question why I was expending so many resources on it.โ
A rough laugh left my throat. โIt seems like a stupidly elaborate ruse for something so simple, but that painting has always fucked me up. I could never let it go. That hideous piece of art symbolized everything she loved more than me. Whenever I see it, I seeย her. I see her sitting down, writing that note, then blowing her brains out.โ
Stella flinched at the visual imagery, but I was too far gone to stop.
โI see myself sitting in my classroom when the principal called me into his office. I see my auntโs face and the funeral and the pitying looks everyone gave me after she died. The town didnโt know the truth about my father; the businessman he was stealing from didnโt want any extra publicity about the case, and he paid off the authorities to keep the whole thing quiet.โ
I swallowed past a strange lump in my throat. โA motherโs love for her child is supposed to be the greatest love of all. Yet it wasnโt enough for her to stay with me.โ
Stella had been quiet throughout my story, but now she looked at me with a thousand words in her eyes.
โChristianโฆโ she breathed, her voice thick with unshed tears.
I tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear. โThis isnโt a sob story, Butterfly,โ I said gru๏ฌy. โDonโt feel bad for me. I got over it a long time ago.โ
It was a heavy story to tell given the day sheโd had, but she wanted real. And my history withย Magdaย was as real as it got.
โI donโt think youโve gotten over it,โ she said softly. โNot if youโre still holding onto it.โ
โTechnically, Dante is holding onto it.โ I sidestepped her observation.
โHow did he get it?โ
โThe painting got stolen, then sold in a bunch of estate sales.โ I didnโt get into the dirty details about Kage, Sentinel, and how, in the mother of all coincidences, it landed in Joshโs hands. Iโd found it before Josh bought it and retrieved the note, but Iโd let the paintingโs sales run their course in order to track down who stole it. Iโd been right about Sentinel and wrong about Axel. โDante acted as my proxy and bought it back since I didnโt want more people knowing about my connection to it. Heโs holding it at his place while I figure out what to do with it.โ
โHave you?โ Stella asked. โFigured out what to do with it?โ
โNot yet. But I will.โ
We lay there, our breaths intertwining in the compressed space between us.
Stella was right. I hadnโt gotten overย Magda.ย Iโd pushed it to the back of my mind because of everything that had happened the past few months, but I could still feel its skeletal grasp on me.
I could destroy it, or I could live in its stranglehold forever.
But that was a decision for another day.
โCan I tell you a secret?โ Stella whispered. โWhen I was in the cabin, and I thought I was about to dieโฆthe person I thought about most was you.โ
Her words sliced me open and dug into my heartโboth the part about her almost dying, and the part where she thought about me.
โIโm not saying Iโm one hundred percent over what you did because Iโm not,โ she said. โBut I also understand keeping things secret and not knowing how to tell the truth. I also realized I was wrong when I compared you to Julian. You would never hurt me the way he did. And, to be honest, Iโฆโ Stella visibly swallowed. โI missed you.โ
The compression in my chest loosened, and my mouth softened in a genuine smile. โI can work with that.โ
โAlsoโฆโ A ruddy flush spread across her cheeks. โIย mightย be able to up the percentage if you give me a goodnight kiss.โ
Laughter rumbled in my chest. โI canย definitelyย work with that.โ
I drew her closer. โI missed you too,โ I added softly before pressing a gentle kiss to her mouth. I could kiss her forever, but I forced myself to pull back after the count of three. Now wasnโt the time for a hot and heavy makeup session. โThatโs all youโre getting for now. You need rest.โ
Stella sighed. โTease.โ
Despite her grumbling, she was out like a light minutes later.
I tucked her closer to my chest and, after weeks of restless nights, let the soothing rhythm of her breaths finally lull me to sleep.
