Julian goes on his annual Thanksgiving weekend trip with Rafa and Nico to his Lake Aurora cabin, leaving me alone to process how it feels to be without him. After seeing Julian almost every day, I feel
his absence already during the first dayโa shocking development to say the least.
My mom, Lily, and I binge the latest season of our favorite telenovela together, which keeps my mind occupied for a day or two, but it never fixes the empty feeling plaguing me since Julian left for the cabin.
Because he fills a void that nothing else can.
A terrifying realization after everything Iโve been through over the last year.
You knew something like this could happen.
Yeah, well, knowing and experiencing are two very different things.
Despite my fear of getting hurt, my feelings are becoming difficult to ignore, especially now that I know how he feels.
Iโm falling in love with you.
Iโve replayed the memory a hundred different times this weekend, expecting the buzz to go away, yet it remains throughout the weekend and well into Monday.
My heart slams against my rib cage when Julian walks into the Founderโs house kitchen with a paper bag I instantly recognize.
I ditch the tile samples and run up to him to confirm the name stamped on the side of the bag.
โNo freaking way!โ I squeal as he passes me a takeout bag from Aomi. โI thought they didnโt offer takeout?โ
โThey donโt.โ
โThen, how?โ
โThey make exceptions.โ โFor a price?โ
He nods, and I laugh at the insanity of it all. I place the bag on the counter and rip it open.
โI ordered a few different rolls since I didnโt know which one you liked most.โ
โAre you kidding? Iโd eat anything from there.โ I reach inside and pull out the first container with a sigh. โHow is this possible? Theyโre in New York.โ
Aomi is the most luxurious and expensive sushi restaurant in the U.S., with most meals costing over a thousand dollars per head since they import fresh seafood directly from Japan. I only went once at my television networkโs expense and never returned because I couldnโt justify the price or trip.
He avoids my gaze. โI hired a guy to pick it up.โ โWith what? A private jet?โ I laugh off the idea. His lips form a thin, white line.
My eyes widen. โOh my God. Tell me you didnโt.โ His silence says enough.
โThatโs terrible for the environment.โ
โAre you going to make me promise to never do it again?โ
โHell no. Next time, weโll have to go together to make it worth the carbon footprint.โ
He shakes his head. โYou never cease to surprise me.โ โThatโs why you like me. Challenge, remember?โ
He kisses my forehead before stepping away. โEnjoy your lunch.โ
The excitement I felt about eating seven-hundred-dollar sushi rolls disappears as Julian walks toward the door.
โI havenโt seen you all weekend,โ I say to his back.
He turns. โDid you miss me?โ I bite down on my tongue.
โYou did.โ He smirks. โShut up,โ I snap.
โWhen youโre ready to admit you couldnโt stand being away from me for four days, come find me.โ His eyes glitter as he moves toward the archway.
โWait!โ
He pauses. โYes?โ
โFine. I missed you.ย A lot.โ
โMe too. I considered ditching Nico and Rafa on the second day.โ
โAnd that right there is why Iโm the favorite godparent.โ I stick out my tongue.
He spares me an icy glare. โIt was for their safety more than anything. I nearly poked Nicoโs eye out while making sโmores because I was busy daydreaming about the other night with you.โ
My cheeks flush.
He nods toward my container. โHope the food is as good as you remember. Iโll stop by later and check on you once Iโm done with the molding in the dining room.โ
โWill you join me?โ After spending a whole weekend without him, I want a little more than three minutes of his time.
โI was hoping youโd ask.โ Heย winks. My whole world stops spinning for a second before I gather my bearings again.
โThe house is coming along.โ He stands on the opposite side of the island.
I glance around the half-finished kitchen, taking in the grand, warm oak cabinets Ryder and his team hung last week.
โI like the color of the island.โ Julian glances over at the deep blue wood paint. โAnd the waterfall counter adds a nice touch.โ
โWhat about the pendant lights?โ I tilt my head toward the lampshades hanging above the off-white quartz counters.
โFits the blend of modern and Victorian youโre going for, although I like the vintage light above the sink most.โ
โMe too. I found it at Another Manโs Treasure and knew we needed it.โ
He steps away from the counter and checks out a few paint swatches. โI like this one.โ He points at my least favorite one.
I must make a face because he asks, โNo?โ
โToo dark, especially if weโre trying to balance out the island.โ โGood point.โ
Julian and I spend the rest of our lunch break discussing other parts of the house while stealing pieces of sushi from each otherโs containers. Compared to Oliverโs go-toย you got this, babeย reply and general apathy toward my design process, Julian not only seems interested but also gives opinions. We have become aย team.
At one point, he smacks my chopsticks away with his own before lifting the piece to my mouth himself. Goose bumps spread across my skin as he feeds me, turning a casual lunch into our own version of foreplay.
I love the little ways he shows he cares, like giving me the last piece from his favorite sushi roll or only stealing a single bite of dessert before handing it over, although I know we both suffer from the same unfortunate sweet tooth.
As a thank-you for todayโs meal, I lift the spoon and feed him the last bit of dessert. His eyes darken as he steals a kiss, flooding my mouth with the taste of peaches.
I tug him closer, not wanting to let him go.
โPeople are working upstairs.โ He pulls me to him. I reach for his shirt. โWe can be quiet.โ
โYou just donโt want me to go.โ
Not at all. The more time I spend around Julian, the less time I want to spend apart, and that kind of reliance on someone else is what scares me most.
After Julian went out of his way to bring me sushi from Aomi earlier, I
almostย feel bad about the prank Lily and I have planned.
It only took me finding one of the crew members laughing at my video for me to remember todayโs mission. Lily assured me the plan is still on, so I need to get Julian into position and let the rest fall into place.
The flaps of the tent slap together after I walk inside. โOh, good. Youโre still here.โ
Julian looks up from the half-carved wooden post. โYeah. Why?โ
I walk around the makeshift woodshop. Based on the number of balusters stacked in neat columns beside him, I doubt Julian has taken much of a break since he arrived at noon.
โI was wondering if you had plans tonight.โ
โWe both know I donโt.โ He wipes his damp brow, spreading sawdust across his forehead.
I walk up to him and wipe it away. โDo you want to get out of here? Iโm hungry.โ
He leans into my touch. โSure.โ
โI was thinking we could grab something to eat on the way back to your place.โ
His brows jump. โWhere are you thinking?โ โNothingย tooย fancy.โ
โThatโs a relief, seeing as the upscale restaurant options in town are probably closed for the night.โ
โMaybe another time.โ I wink. โWhat about Early Bird?โ โThatโs perfect.โ
Julian holds the tent flap back for me, turning my stomach into a ball of knots.
Itโs not too late to cancel everything.
I give my head a hard shake. There is no way in hell Iโm skipping out on the opportunity to pull the ultimate prank, especially after what he did to me in the attic.
โShould we go in two cars or one?โ I bat my lashes.
His thick swallow nearly makes me drop my cover. โYou could drop yours off at your house, and Iโll drive us to the diner.โ
โSounds good to me.โ
I pull out my phone and shoot Lily a text.
ME
Plan is a go.
My phone vibrates from an incoming call from my agent before we make it out the front door.
โGive me a second,โ I tell Julian before answering. โHey, Jamie.โ โDahlia! How are you?โ
โGood. And you?โ
โDoing well. I know itโs late, but I couldnโt wait until tomorrow to call you.โ
My heart rate increases with each beat. โWhatโs up?โ โWe got a new offer.โ
โReally?โ
Julianโs face strains as he tries to listen, so I put Jamie on speakerphone to save him the trouble. โAn offer from who?โ
โArcher Media.โ
โNo way.โ The Creswells always complained about their growing web of networks and record-breaking viewer numbers.
Julian pulls out his phone and taps away while I process Jamieโs news. Until I have a contract in my hand, I probably wonโt believe Archer Media wants to work with me, especially after being burned once before.
She laughs. โTheyโre in the market for a show like yours for their fixer- upper network.โ
โWow.โ
โAnd the best part? Theyโre willing to pay you double what you made with your last contract.โ
My lips part.
โI can get started on discussing logistics with filming in San Francisco.
They seem eager to get started as soon as possible.โ
Julian gives me his back, either out of privacy or to shield his disappointment. My excitement dies with every rise and fall of his shoulders.
โIf youโre interested, we can schedule a meeting with them to discuss everything.โ
I shake my head to clear my thoughts. โYes. Of course Iโm interested.โ
Then why do you sound less than enthusiastic about the offer?
Probably because while renovating the Founderโs house, I fell in love with the man who bought it.
Are you considering giving up a television opportunity like this for Julian?
Yes? No? Probably, although I hate admitting it. As much as I love connecting with families and helping make their dream homes come true one television episode at a time, I also love working with Julian and his team. Just like I love being back at Lake Wisteria with my family.
San Francisco has been my home since I started at Stanford, but Lake Wisteria has my heartโฆand Julian along with it.
But after spending years of my life catering to someone elseโs needs, Iโm afraid of repeating the same mistake.
Jamie rattles on. โThings are going to move pretty fast because Archer wants to start interviewing potential homeowners after Christmas.โ
โHuh?โ I shake my head. โThatโs in a month.โ
โI know. Itโs a lot to take in, but theyโre so excited about collaborating with you.โ
โGreat.โ I try my hardest to muster up a cheery voice. โThey want to meet with us as soon as possible.โ
โIโm pretty flexible, so I can meet as early as next week.โ โPerfect. My assistant can reach out once I nail down a date.โ
โSounds like a plan. Thanks, Jamie.โ
She hangs up, and I turn toward Julian. He is quick to school his features, but it doesnโt stop me from sensing the weird energy brewing between us.
โJulian.โ
โCongratulations,โ he says with a tight smile. โI knew it would be only a matter of time before youโd get another offer.โ
Oh God. Heโs already starting to pull away.ย โButโโ
He silences me with a kiss. This one is fueled by a new kind of desperation that has my toes curling and my chest tightening all at the same time.
Iโm hit with a wave of different emotions. Happiness. Sadness. Fear and uncertainty.
I might not have it all figured out, but I do know one thing: Lily was right. My biggest issue isnโt that I donโt trust Julian, but that I donโt trustย myself.