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Chapter no 1 – Julian

Love Redesigned

Iโ€™m about ten seconds away from losing my goddamn mind, and I have the painfully slow driver clogging up the only road into town to blame.

The sun set twenty minutes ago, giving me nothing to focus on but the illuminated California license plate caught in my headlights. I resist the urge to flash my high beams and honk my horn, although I nearly give in when the black Mercedes-Benz sedan weaves slightly to the side before correcting itself.

Cรกlmate. You only have five more miles left before hitting Main Street.

While Iโ€™m tempted to cut around the other driver so I can make it in time for my godsonโ€™s talent show, I donโ€™t want to risk damaging my new McLaren by going off-road. I didnโ€™t spend the last few years of my life talking myself into buying my dream car only to ruin the suspension a week after having it delivered.

Cรกlmate:ย Calm down.

 

The blast of my phoneโ€™s ringtone startles me as my cousinโ€™s name flashes across the screen. I take a deep breath before stabbing the button on my steering wheel.

โ€œWhere the hell are you?โ€ The sound of Rafaelโ€™s harsh whisper fills the

car.

โ€œIโ€™ll be there in ten minutes.โ€

A disapproving hum follows. โ€œBut the show starts in five.โ€

โ€œDonโ€™t worry. Iโ€™ll make it before Nico takes the stage.โ€ โ€œNot sure how thatโ€™s possible when heโ€™s in the opening act.โ€ย Mierda.ย โ€œI had no clue.โ€

โ€œThe program schedule got switched at the last minute after a few kids came down with a bug. I texted you this morning about it.โ€ He doesnโ€™t bother hiding his annoyance.

My hands clutch the smooth leather wheel. โ€œThe meeting in Lake Aurora took a lot longer than expected.โ€

โ€œOf course it did.โ€

โ€œThings should slow down soon.โ€

โ€œSure they will.โ€ His rough tone only fuels my irritation.

Before his wife filed for divorce two years ago, people called Rafael the easygoing Lopez cousin, with him constantly going out of his way to put a smile on everyoneโ€™s face.

Rafaelโ€™s deep sigh cuts through the silence. โ€œItโ€™s fine. Nico will understand.โ€

Mierda:ย Shit.

 

My godson might be a mature eight-year-old kid, but he isnโ€™tย thatย mature. And after everything he has been through with his parentsโ€™ divorce, I refuse to add myself to his growing list of family disappointments.

โ€œYour mom saved you a seat in the back of the auditorium in case you make it.โ€

โ€œRafa, Iโ€™ll beโ€”โ€

He hangs up before hearing the rest of my sentence.

Pendejo.

Rafa and I have been butting heads more often than not lately, mostly due to his attitude and my busy schedule running my late fatherโ€™s construction company. While I try my hardest to balance my personal life and Lopez Luxury expanding beyond my fatherโ€™s wildest dreams, I keep falling short.

I scan the narrow space beside the road. The incline is muddy but still drivable for the handful of seconds I need to pass the car in front of me.

Stop overthinking and do it.

The rosary my mother hung from my rearview mirror spins as I turn my wheel toward the shoulder and slam my foot against the gas pedal. The engine revs as it switches gears, and my tires squeal.

My heart lodges itself in my throat as the other vehicle veers to the right and blocks my clear path.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!

Pendejo:ย Dick.

 

Time seems to speed up as our two cars collide. My headlight shatters and metal crunches as the front of my car smashes into the rear bumper of the other. Iโ€™m propelled forward, only to be shoved in the opposite direction as my seat belt locks in place.

Thankfully, the airbags donโ€™t deploy, although my relief is short-lived as whatever spark of hope I had of making it to Nicoโ€™s show fizzles out, leaving me with nothing but a desire to yell at the reckless driver.

Take five.ย The memory of my dadโ€™s voice pulls at the invisible strings wrapped around my heart until the tightness seems unbearable. I can picture him clearly as he helped me calm down from another night terror, one deep breath at a time.

I never thought I would be using the same strategy twenty-five years later, but here I am, with my eyes screwed shut as I force myself to count my breaths until the chest pain lessens and Iโ€™m no longer vibrating with rage.

Iโ€™m hit with an early October breeze as I walk toward the other car. The driver is hunched over the wheel, her dark, shoulder-length hair obstructing my view of her face.

I reach out to tap on the window, but a high-pitched shriek coming out of the carโ€™s speakers stops me. โ€œDonโ€™t worry! Iโ€™m on my way!โ€ The call cuts out after two beeps.

The womanโ€™s panicked breathing becomes more obvious with each rapid rise and fall of her back.

โ€œHey.โ€ I knock my fist against the window when she doesnโ€™t acknowledge me. โ€œAre you okay?โ€

She lifts a trembling finger to the glass while keeping her head down. โ€œOne second.โ€ Her voice wavers.

My stomach muscles clench. โ€œDo you need an ambulance?โ€ โ€œNo! Iโ€™m fine!โ€ Her head snaps in my direction.

Vete a la chingada.

โ€œJulian?โ€ My name leaves Dahlia Muรฑozโ€™s parted pink lips in a hoarse whisper.

Itโ€™s been years since I heard Dahlia say my name in that soft voice of hers, and it hits harder than a sledgehammer to the chest.

The last time I saw her was at Nicoโ€™s baptism eight years ago when we became his godparents. We both put on a happy face for our families, but the tension and awkward silence between us nearly choked me, especially since we hadnโ€™t spoken since my dadโ€™s funeral a year and a half prior.

She stayed at Stanford all year round, including the summer break, while I kept my distance because I was a coward.

A coward who was blindsided when she showed up with Oliver, my ex- roommate and her new boyfriend. I didnโ€™t think they would become friends, let alone a couple, although it makes sense given Oliverโ€™s jabs about my crush on Dahlia and the way he looked at her despite knowing how I felt.

Since the baptism, we have both done an outstanding job of avoiding each otherโ€”or at least weย hadย until she ruined all our efforts with tonightโ€™s surprise visit.

โ€œDahlia.โ€ An intense need to escape overwhelms me as her eyes slide over me.

Vete a la chingada:ย Get the fuck out of here.

 

I hide my shock as she exits the car with her head held high despite the mascara running down her cheeks and the slight trembling of her chin.

Dahlia has only cried twice in the thirty years Iโ€™ve known herโ€”once when she broke her arm trying to beat me in a tree-climbing contest and the other while at her fatherโ€™s funeral.

Like the tide with the moon, Iโ€™m unable to resist Dahliaโ€™s gravitational pull as my gaze follows the length of her body.

The plain white T-shirt she wears complements her golden skin and wavy brown hair, while her ripped jeans appear more fashionable than functional with how her knees pop out of the large, gaping holes. Her curves perfectly balance out her sharp cheekbones and pointed chin, creating the best combination of soft and sultry.

The base of my neck tingles, and I look up to find Dahliaโ€™s red, puffy eyes narrowed at me. Her ruined makeup doesnโ€™t detract from her beauty, although the dark circles underneath her eyes have me speaking before my brain catches up.

โ€œYour face is a mess.โ€

Pinche estรบpido.ย Unlike my mom and cousin, Iโ€™m not a people person, and it clearly shows.

Dahliaโ€™s golden rings glint in the moonlight as she wipes at her cheeks with a frown. โ€œI had something in my eye.โ€

โ€œBoth of them?โ€ I widen my stance as I cross my arms.

She dabs at the corners of her eyes with her two middle fingers. โ€œA decent person wouldnโ€™t call me out on that lie.โ€

โ€œSince when are we decent to one another?โ€

Pinche estรบpido:ย Fucking idiot.

 

โ€œItโ€™s never too late to start.โ€

Because of our slight height difference, she is forced to tilt her head back to get a good look at me. Her walnut-colored eyes remind me of long- ago late nights spent in the woodshop, meticulously obsessing over staining my latest carpentry project.

Whatever resolve I had quickly crumbles when sheย sniffles.

โ€œAllergies.โ€ Her defensive tone, paired with her twitching nose, makes my chest constrict in an act of ultimate betrayal.

What the hell is going on here, and how do I get it to stop?

I keep my facial expression neutral despite the rapid thumping of my heart against my rib cage. She doesnโ€™t last long under my scrutiny before slumping against the door with a sigh.

Iโ€™m struck with a compulsion to say something, but words fail me. My ringtone shatters the moment. โ€œShit!โ€

Her brows shoot toward her hairline. โ€œWhatโ€™s wrong?โ€

You. Always you.

Blaring sirens drown out my response. Every muscle in my body goes rigid as a rush of vehicles makes its way around the bend in a single-file line. A fire truck and ambulance lead the safety brigade, followed by the sheriff, his deputies, and the Lake Wisteria trolley.

Youโ€™ve got to be kidding me.

Dahlia curses up to the stars. โ€œDios, dame paciencia con mi mamรก.โ€

Dios, dame paciencia con mi mamรก:ย God, give me patience with my mom.

 

My gaze cuts into her. โ€œThatโ€™s who you were talking to?โ€ โ€œUnfortunately.โ€

Leave it to Lake Wisteria to turn a fender bender into a community crisis.

Itโ€™s not the cars theyโ€™re concerned about. Itโ€™sย her.

Dahlia is more than my childhood rival. Sheโ€™s Lake Wisteriaโ€™s Strawberry Sweetheart who is finally returning home after years spent away living out her California dream.

And youโ€™re theย cabrรณnย who nearly drove her into a ditch.

I rub at my throbbing temple.

โ€œDo you think we can escape before they get here?โ€ Dahliaโ€™s gaze flicks from me to my car.

โ€œThis is all your fault.โ€ The words slip out.

A few minutes in Dahliaโ€™s presence already have me slipping back into the bad habit of speaking without thinking.

Add it to the long list of reasons you should avoid her.

She pops a hand on her hip. โ€œMy fault?ย We wouldnโ€™t be in this mess if you hadnโ€™t tried to cut me off.โ€

โ€œI had somewhere to be.โ€

She throws her arms up. โ€œWell, I was…โ€

Usually I crave silence, but something about Dahlia shutting down at the first sign of opposition frustrates me.

Bright flashing lights cast us in shades of red, white, and blue as a few of the firefighters hop out of the truck to assess the scene while two medics quickly determine both Dahlia and I are fine.

Cabrรณn:ย Bastard.

 

The older fire chief pulls Dahlia in for a hug. โ€œYour mom made it sound like you were dying.โ€

Her eyes roll. โ€œYou know how overprotective she can be.โ€

The fire chief ruffles Dahliaโ€™s hair. โ€œShe comes from a good place.โ€ โ€œLucifer said the same thing about hell.โ€ Dahlia fixes her appearance

with a pinched expression.

โ€œDahlia!โ€ Rosa hops out of the trolley and runs toward her daughter with a rosary clutched in one hand and a bottle of holy water in the other. My own mom exits the trolley with a group of people trailing behind her, turning our car accident into a town reunion.

โ€œMami.โ€ Dahlia checks out the crowd forming behind the deputyโ€™s line. โ€œDid you need to involve everyone?โ€

โ€œDonโ€™t start with me. ยฟQuรฉ pasรณ?โ€ Rosa scans her daughter from head to toe before ripping the cap off the holy water.

For the first time tonight, Dahliaโ€™s eyes twinkle brighter than the stars above us. โ€œJulian crashed into me.โ€

That little brat.

Rosa stares at me as if I committed a felony.

I bristle at my momโ€™s voice as she storms over to us. โ€œJulian? Tell me thatโ€™s not true.โ€

โ€œMa.โ€

She snatches the bottle of holy water from Rosaโ€™s hands and gives me a swift blessing before sprinkling me with it. โ€œWhat were you thinking by trying to run Dahlia off the road?โ€

ยฟQuรฉ pasรณ?:ย What happened.

 

โ€œThat itโ€™s a shame I failed.โ€

The fire chief covers up his laugh with a cough.

Dahliaโ€™s heated glare threatens to burn a hole in the side of my face. โ€œDonโ€™t tell me youโ€™ve spent all these years plotting my murder only to fail now?โ€

โ€œTrust me. I wonโ€™t make the same mistake again.โ€ She flips me off.

โ€œDahlia Isabella Muรฑoz!โ€ Rosa tugs at her daughterโ€™s hand while my mother whisper-shouts, โ€œLuis Julian Lopez Junior!โ€

My mom only uses my official first name on rareโ€”and very pissed-off

โ€”occasions, so I better rein myself in before she loses her cool.

Dahlia and I sigh at the same time, and our gazes collide, scattering my thoughts until Iโ€™m left with only one.

Her.

The sheriff approaches the scene, saving me from embarrassing myself any further. Thankfully, the deputy with a personal vendetta against me stays far away, a blessing in itself given my bad luck today.

Knowing Dahlia, she would befriend him to spite me.

The older sheriff drags Dahlia into a quick bear hug. โ€œSo, what happened here?โ€

โ€œYou should arrest Julian for attempted murder.โ€ Dahliaโ€™s wicked grin sets off a blaring alarm in my head. Memories I spent years erasing surge to the forefront of my mind, flashing before me like a haunted movie reel.

The way her smile grew wider whenever I got flustered and spoke out of turn.

Her sparkling eyes looking up at me as weโ€”no,ย Iย stiffly moved us around the dance floor during her quinceaรฑera.

How she had a similar expression during her valedictorian speech as she thanked me, the salutatorian, for putting up a good fight throughout high school.

Itโ€™s pathetic how one smile from her can stir up countless memories, all of which are best left in the past, along with any feelings I once had for her.

Truth is, Iโ€™m not sure why Dahlia Muรฑoz is back, but nothing good can come of it.

Nothing good at all

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