Tย he Eloise Inn had been in my family for generations. As a kid, Iโd played in the lobby while Mom attended to the desk, greeting and helping guests. As a teen, Iโd spent my summers here as a housekeeper, cleaning rooms for clothes and gas money.
But it hadnโt been until this past week that, for the first time, I truly understood the charm of this hotel. Because for the past week, Iโd basically been a guest.
Each night after work, Iโd slip up the stairwell to Vanceโs room on the fourth floor. Weโd spend hours in the plush bed, wearing each other to exhaustion. Weโd take a hot shower together in the middle of the night, then dry off with soft towels that smelled like spring rain. Then Iโd crash, sleeping like the dead until my alarm blared at four. Iโd wake early to sneak out of the building and head to my coffee shop across the street.
This hotel had become a sanctuary. Or maybe that was just Vance. โAre you going to work or home?โ he asked.
Dressed only in his familiar gray sweatpants, his hair askew from my fingers, he opened the door, leaning out to check the hallway. When he confirmed it was empty, he stood against its face, propping it wide.
โWork.โ I kept my voice low from my seat on the edge of the bed, bent to tie my tennis shoes.
The longest tendrils of my hair were still damp from last nightโs shower, so Iโd twisted it into a knot. My skin smelled like Vance, a heady mixture of soap and spice and earth. And, other than the clean panties Iโd stashed in my purse, I was wearing yesterdayโs clothes. A tee and a pair of jeans were waiting for me in my office.
Iโd sneak to the shop and change, no one the wiser that I hadnโt slept in my own bed for a week.
The secrecy was a rush. So far, Iโd managed to avoid my family by coming to The Eloise each night and leaving before dawn each morning. In
a way, I felt like a teenager, infatuated with a boy for the first time in her life.
Not that Vance could ever be mistaken for a boy. Not with that six- foot-five frame.
His biceps flexed as he crossed his arms over his chest, relaxing against that door. The dusting of hair over his pecs only made him seem broader. Stronger. Last night, Iโd traced every inch of his washboard abs with my tongue.
โAre you going out today?โ I glanced over my shoulder to the windows. Weโd been so caught up in each other last night, from the moment heโd pulled me into the room, weโd barely broken apart. And when weโd finally crashed, neither of us had mustered the energy to close the curtains.
Beyond the glass, only the muted lights from Main illuminated the outline of roofs and buildings.
โYeah,โ Vance said. โIโll head up before first light.โ
โWatch out for grizzly bears.โ I stood, crossing the space between us. Vance framed my face in his hands, bending to brush a kiss to my lips.
His tongue flicked out, licking my bottom lip.
A shiver raced down my spine, and as I shivered, he deepened the kiss, his tongue sliding inside and stroking mine with a lazy swirl. When I rose up on my toes, seeking more, he wrapped his arms around me, hauling me into the hard plane of his chest.
Then he kissed me. God, the way this man kissed me.
It was like I was his air. His reason for breathing. Silly, considering we were just fooling around while he was in town. Still, I sank into the kiss as a pulse bloomed in my center. Desire coiled in my lower belly.
But before I could shove those sweats off his narrow hips, he pulled away. โIf we donโt stop now . . .โ
We wouldnโt stop for hours. And while I hadnโt needed to mention to Vance that I was sneaking in and out, doing my very best to go unnoticed, he knew. If people saw us together, it would only lead to questions.
We werenโt answering questions, not even each otherโs.
Vance hadnโt told me much about his life in Idaho. He hadnโt offered more details about Cormac. Pillow talk this past week had centered around a safe topicโme.
Weโd talked about my family. About life growing up in Quincy. How my mom had taught me to cook and bake. Last night, heโd asked me
question after question about the coffee shop, so Iโd told him how Iโd used my inheritance to start the business and some of the hurdles Iโd jumped over along the wayโemployees and expenses.
Heโd listened with rapt attention. Maybe I should have been flattered. No man before Vance had ever taken such an avid interest in my life. Most guys Iโd dated had seen Eden Coffee as competition for attention.
Vanceโs genuine curiosity was refreshing. Still, something about his interest bothered me. Maybe because it was too strong.
Because if we were talking about me, then weย werenโtย talking about
him.
He hadnโt shared one tidbit of personal information. Not one scrap that
I could cling to.
This was just s*x. Incredible, mind-blowing, toe-curling s*x. Before Vance, I hadnโt even known what an orgasm should feel like. My body came apart under his hands. I found myself becoming bolder, taking the pleasure I craved. And Vance delivered, time and time again.
Another woman might have been okay drawing that line. Sheโd simply be grateful that she was getting fucked by an Adonis every night.
Yet I yearned for more. Was that my problem? That I always wanted more?
I wanted what this man couldnโt give me. Was I okay with that?ย Maybe. Maybe not.
โDid you decide how long you were staying?โ I asked, grabbing my coat from where it had landed on the floor last night. โDo you need to get back to work?โ
โNot sure yet,โ he said. โIโll let you know.โ
Would he though? Or would I come to this room one night and find him gone?
That was a question I didnโt want answered, so I snagged my purse, looping it over a shoulder, then went to him for a chaste kiss. โSee ya.โ
โBye, Blue.โ
That nickname, like the coffee shopโs bell, always made me smile. My cheeks warmed as I stepped into the hallway, doing my own check to ensure I was alone. Then I hurried for the stairwell, looking back for a brief moment before ducking through the door.
Vance was gone.
I hurried downstairs, taking the exit that led to the alley and parking lot behind The Eloise. Then I zipped up my coat, tucking my hands into the pockets to keep them warm as I rounded the building and jogged across Main.
When I reached the sidewalk outside the coffee shop, I looked up to the hotel, searching for Vance in the window. His frame filled the glass.
I didnโt wave. Just in case someone saw me out on the street, I didnโt want to risk that exposure. I simply turned and walked to the coffee shop, digging my keys from my purse to unlock the front door.
The stillness in the shop settled my racing heart. Necessity was the reason Iโd started coming to the shop at four oโclock in the morning. While the rest of Quincy was asleep, I could work in silence without distraction.
So after quickly changing my clothes, I busied myself in the kitchen. Today, I felt like a slice of homemade whole wheat toast with salted butter and apricot preserves for breakfast, so I got to work.
The scent of yeast and flour was normally as comforting as any hug, but as I left the dough to rise, I waited for the tension to slip from my shoulders. I waited for the peace I normally found in these quiet, early hours.
It never came. Thereโd been somethingย offย about my mornings for weeks. Ever since the river.
Instead of enjoying a latte before I flipped on the rest of the shopโs lights and opened for the public, I found myself sitting in Vanceโs chair, staring out at the street.
His truck was still parked outside the hotel. The light in his room was off.
My hand came to my throat, feeling my skin. I was tired of scarves, so I hadnโt brought one to wear today.
The bruises were fading, day by day, and besides, it wasnโt like everyone in town didnโt know what had happened by now. Gossip traveled faster than a bullet in Quincy, Montana.
Was that why I wanted to know all about Vance? Because Iโd been trained by this small town to feed my curiosity? That secrets werenโt sacred, they were a challenge?
Or maybe I was just a woman who wanted to know about the man sheโd let inside her body.
I shook off the thought. It was the first Monday in October. Mondays were usually slow, especially this time of year, when we had few tourists in town.
On a day like this, Iโd usually let Crystal make coffee and serve customers while I spent hours decorating these windows, hand-painting white spiderwebs in the corners of the glass. Iโd have spooky cookies in the oven and a jar of candy corn on the counter for decoration.
I looked forward to Halloween each and every year. But just the thought of finding my paintbrush and decorating the windows made my lip curl.
God, what was wrong with me? When was I going to start feeling like myself again? It had been weeks since the river. When would it stop weighing so heavily on my soul?
โLyla.โ
โAh!โ I jumped, practically leaping out of my chair as Crystalโs hand touched my shoulder. โOh my God. You scared me.โ
โIโm so sorry. I thought you heard me come in the back door.โ
โItโs fine.โ I waved it off, then took a breath, willing my heart to climb out of my throat.
โWhat are you doing?โ she asked. โJust sitting in the dark?โ
โOh, I was just, um . . . trying to figure out how I could paint spiderwebs and then turn them into snowflakes after Thanksgiving,โ I lied.
โGood idea. Iโd offer to help, but Iโm hopeless with art projects.โ She gave me an exaggerated frown.
Her lipstick was orange today, the color of carrots. Crystal had a different color lipstick for each day of the month, ranging from blue to red to green.
Her quirky nature was part of why Iโd hired her. She didnโt care that some of the grumpy old men in town gave her strange looks when she wore purple lipstick. She was confident in her style and herself.
I usually felt the same. Just, not lately. Not since the river.
Was it the bruises? Would I feel like me again once they were completely gone?
My gaze shifted to the windows again. โWhat if there were no webs this year? What if we skipped the snowflakes?โ
โWhat do you mean?โ Crystal asked. โLike do something else? Spiders or whatever?โ
Or whatever.
โIโll come up with something,โ I said, giving her a forced smile. Then I followed her to the counter and helped prep for the day.
I pretended that everything was normal. I smiled like I meant it.
Not ten minutes after Crystal had unlocked the front door at six, the bell jingled and I looked up from where Iโd been making that latte for myself.
Vance crossed the shop, stopping at the counter. โHi.โ
โGood morning.โ Iโd assumed heโd be long gone for the mountains by now, but with Crystal here, I didnโt ask.
His beanie covered his unruly hair. His coat molded to those broad shoulders. Those bright, clear eyes raked over my body, head to toe. โCoffee.โ
โThey didnโt have any at the hotel?โ โYours is better.โ
Yes, it was. โTo go?โ He nodded. โPlease.โ
Please. Last night, Vance had made me say please each time Iโd wanted to come. Heโd made me beg, and it had made the release so much sweeter. My cheeks flushed as I filled his paper cup.
The timer Iโd brought out from the kitchen dinged, signaling the bread was done.
โIโll get it,โ Crystal said, leaving us alone.
โYou like that, donโt you?โ Vanceโs voice was a deep murmur. โMe, saying please.โ
โYes. But I like to be the one to say please too,โ I whispered.
โNoted.โ The corner of his mouth turned up. โIโll make you say it later.โ
โYouโre on, Sutter.โ I handed over his coffee, shaking my head when he tried to pay. โItโs on me.โ
Vance reached for his wallet, taking out a five-dollar bill. He winked as he set it on the counter. โSee ya, Blue.โ
He walked away, coffee in hand. He was escaping to the mountains.
An odd feeling came over me as he headed for the door. It felt a lot like . . . envy.
For the first time in my life, the last place I wanted to be was within these walls. I didnโt want to bake and serve and smile.
โVance?โ I called, stopping him. He stopped. โYeah?โ
โCan I go with you today?โ What was I even asking? I needed to work.
Didnโt I?
โSure,โ he agreed without hesitation.
My heart galloped. Spontaneity was not, well . . . me. But the idea of ditching work felt so right. โI need to take my car home. Meet me in the alley in five minutes?โ
โโKay.โ
I rushed away from the counter so fast I nearly tripped on my own feet. Then I hustled to the kitchen, where Crystal was putting my bread loaves on cooling racks. โHey, would you care if I took off for today?โ
She blinked, like that question had shocked her into silence. โYouโre not supposed to work Mondays.โ
โHuh?โ
โWhen you hired me, you said you were going to take Mondays off.โ โOh.โ Yet I never let her work alone.
It had nothing to do with her. And everything to do with me. โWell, if youโre okay with it, Iโll take off today.โ
โOf course.โ She smiled, standing taller. Her brown eyes sparkled. โI can handle it.โ
โI know you can,โ I told her, then hurried to my office to collect my coat and yesterdayโs clothes.
With them shoved into my purse so Crystal wouldnโt notice, I headed for my car. Like it had been every morning, the windows were coated in frost. I tossed my things inside and quickly scraped the glass, finishing just as Vance pulled his truck into the alley.
I climbed in the car and led the way to my house.
There werenโt a lot of brand-new homes in Quincy, but along with buying and renovating the building on Main for Eden Coffee, Iโd used my inheritance to build my dream house about two miles from town.
It was farmhouse style, with pretty white siding and a quaint porch. The black shutters matched the shade of the tin roof. There were three bedrooms, a spacious kitchen and an office. The other houses in the neighborhood were home to growing families. That was what Iโd envisioned for this house. A family.
As I eased into the driveway and parked in the garage, taking in my charming home, a heaviness settled in my chest.
What if there was no family? What if it was only me?
The slam of Vanceโs truck door snapped me out of that thought, and I shut off my car and got out, joining him in the driveway so we could go in through the front door.
โNice place.โ He took it all in, top to bottom, just like he usually did with me.
That was his way, wasnโt it? He scanned. Assessed.
โI just want to change into something warmer,โ I said.
โTake your time.โ He followed me inside, closing the door behind us while I rushed down the hall for my bedroom.
It only took minutes to pull on a thick sweatshirt and hiking boots. Then I grabbed a coat, hat and gloves, carrying them out to the living room, where I found Vance leaning in to study a framed picture hanging on the wall.
โThis is your family?โ he asked, not tearing his eyes from the photo. โIt is. Those are my parents and my brothers and sisters.โ I came to
stand by his side, taking in the dated photo. Strange how I passed this picture every day but hadnโt really looked at it in a while.
โThat was Knoxโs senior year in high school,โ I said. โMom was saying the other day how we needed to get a new photo taken now that our family has grown so much.โ
Husbands. Wives. Children.
Mateo and I would be paired together, no doubt, as the only two single people in our family.
โDo you have a big family?โ
Vance straightened, turning from the picture. Not a word escaped his
lips.
Apparently his family, along with every other personal topic, was off-
limits.
โRight,โ I muttered. โToo personal. You can fuck me senseless every night, but thatโs where it ends.โ
โLylaโโ
โItโs fine.โ I flicked my wrist. It wasnโt fine. Nothing right now was fine. If I was being honest with myself, that outburst had more to do with me than it did Vance.
I pulled off the hat Iโd just put on, feeling too hot. The sweatshirt was suddenly suffocating. โActually, I think Iโm going to just stay home today. You go without me.โ
Vanceโs face was unreadable. Maybe he was relieved. Maybe he was sorry. Maybe he was annoyed. Fuck if I knew.
โRain check.โ He gave me a single nod, then walked down the entryway and out the door.
I didnโt stop him. Instead I reached for the hem of my sweatshirt and ripped it from my torso, throwing it on the floor. โGah!โ
What was wrong with me? I didnโt want to be at work. I didnโt want to be at homeโI didnโt want to be anywhere. Iโd been sleeping with Vance and knew nothing about him.
Everything wasย wrong.
And I didnโt know how to make it right.
I unglued my feet, about to go to the kitchen. Maybe my favorite room in the house would make me feel more like myself. But then my own reflection caught my eye in the decorative mirror Iโd hung on one of the living room walls.
It stopped me cold.
My throat was a wash of greenish yellow. But there were a few circles still black and blue. I stepped closer to the mirror, taking in those circles.
Fingertips. They were from Cormacโs fingertips. The motherfucker.
โCormac.โ
It was the first time Iโd said his name out loud.
โCormac.โ My voice was stronger. Firmer. Angrier.
I knew his name. I knew his crimes. I knew because of Vance. Because Iโd believed every word heโd given me about my attacker.
Meanwhile, he didnโt speak of his family. His friends. His job. His life.
All heโd ever really shared was about Cormac.
The hairs on the back of my neck stood on end.
Who was Vance? What if I was wrong? Heโd told me he was a cop, but heโd never shown me a badge. Iโd never asked to see one.
Winn never went anywhere without hers. Even when she went to Mom and Dadโs house for a family dinner at the ranch, she brought along her badge.
Iโd spent a week sleeping in Vanceโs hotel room with no badge in sight.
โOh my God.โ I wrapped my arms around my waist, my head spinning.
Everything heโd told me Iโd kept from Winn. Heโd asked me to keep it quiet and Iโd agreed. What if Iโd made a huge mistake?
The day Iโd found Cormac on that river, Iโd assumed heโd say hello. Iโd assumed weโd talk about the weather before going our separate ways. Iโd assumed he could be trusted.
And Iโd trusted Vance.
Iโd blindly believed Vance because heโd told me everything Iโd wanted to hear. My stomach pitched.
โYouโre such a fucking idiot,โ I snapped at my reflection, then I bolted, grabbing my keys before I sprinted for the garage.
And while I drove to the police station, I pretended that I wasnโt betraying Vance.