ITโS BEENย two days since I gave the presentation to the Atlantic Union Congress. Thereโs been no decision yet. I count that as a bad sign. I feel like a trial lawyer who has made his case, as best he could, for an innocent client facing the death penaltyโand now that clientโs fate is in the hands of people who donโt understand the case and may act irrationally or selfishly. Itโs driving me crazy.
Iโm sitting in Fowlerโs office at NASA headquarters, talking with him about the mission, when his assistant, a Marine lieutenant, knocks and enters.
โSir, the Executive Council is asking for you. Both of you.โ
This time, we meet with the leaders of the Atlantic Union in a smaller room: a situation room at the executive office building. The elected leaders of all of the unionโs preeminent nations are seated at a long conference table. The president of the United States speaks first.
โGentlemen, you are a go for your mission.โ
Relief floods through me. I can actually feel the stress draining from my body.
The feeling doesnโt last long.
โBut there are two conditions,โ the president says, his gruff voice getting rougher with each passing word, like a chainsaw cranking. โFirst, the launch will not take place until weโve recovered and retrofitted at least two hundred nuclear warheads.โ
โRetrofitted for what?โ I ask.
โDeployment in space. Iโm sure the two of you can arrive at the reason, but Iโll say it so thereโs no ambiguity: we believe your mission could
antagonize our enemy and cause them to respond with force. We want to be ready to defend ourselves.โ
I canโt believe what Iโm hearing.
โThat could take years.โ I practically shout the words.
โMaybe.โ The president fixes me with a hard stare. โBut I hear youโre pretty good with robotics. Perhaps you could assist in the recovery and redesign efforts.โ
Fowler shoots me a look that says,ย Let me handle this. โAnd the second condition?โ Fowler asks.
โBefore you inform the Caspians or the Pac, we need to be ready here on the ground.โ
โReady how?โ Fowler asks softly. โFor war.โ
I canโt hold my tongue anymore. โWhat doesย thatย mean?โ
โIt means, Dr. Sinclair, that we need to secure our new borders, build up our military presence on those borders, and strengthen our spy network abroad so that we can be ready and able to respond to any act of aggression.โ
โThat works against everything weโre trying to do! A military buildup will siphon resources from the nuclear refittingโas well as the mission, not to mention putting the other nations on guard. You know they have spies here in the AU. Theyโll know about the military buildup the moment it starts. Theyโll respond in kind.โ
The president looks me directly in the eye. โThose are the conditions, gentlemen.โ
His message is clear; the decision has been made. And it wonโt be unmade.
INย FOWLERโS OFFICE, I pace, fit to be tied.
โThis is ludicrous. Theyโre talking about fortifying borders for this habitable zone that we canโtย possiblyย defend against either the Caspians or the Pac, not to mention that huge solar array out there.ย Offenseย is our only chance of survival.โ
Fowler leans back in his office chair, reflecting. His voice is barely above a whisper.
โThereโs nothing we can do about it, James. Our job is science. This is politics. These are peopleโirrational, frightened, angry peopleโwho sometimes make bad decisions. We have our orders.โ
IโM EXHAUSTEDย when I get home. As I enter the anteroom that blasts me with warm air, I hear Emmaโs voice inside, talking with someone, a woman. โThe doctors say I simply wonโt regain the bone density Iโve lost. My
recovery is plateaued.โ
โHave you told James?โ โNo.โ
Iโm inclined to leave again, to give her privacy, but I know that voiceโ the person sheโs talking to. It seems impossible.
My curiosity overwhelms me.
I push into the habitat. My nephew, Jack, is sitting in our makeshift living room-rehab center. A young girl, a toddler, sits beside him. Iโve never met her in person before, but I know itโs my niece, Sarah. The two of them are playing on their tablets, not a care in the world. Itโs a beautiful sight after a long day.
Emma gets up from the table when she sees me. Abby turns. I expect to see a scowl on her face, but her expression is blank.
I walk over slowly, not sure what to say. Emma saves me.
โJames, Abby came by and brought the kids. She thought you might like to see them.โ
Only then do the kids realize Iโm there. Jack tosses his tablet aside and runs over to me.
โUncle James!โ
He practically bowls me over. I hug him as tightly as I think his little body can stand. Itโs the best feeling Iโve had in a long time. Iโve wondered what their parents told them about what happened to me. About my long absence. Whatever it was, it hasnโt affected how he feels about me.
Sarah wanders over to me cautiously, eyeing her brother. He reaches out an arm and pulls her into us.
โThis is Sarah. She canโt talk real well yet, but she can run.โ
I shake her hand and say, in mock seriousness, โItโs nice to meet you, maโam. And donโt worry, talking is overrated. Running is all that matters right now.โ
A shy smile spreads across her face, and her big, adorable cheeks flush with red. She reminds me a lot of Abby.
I canโt help but look around, searching for my brother. Thereโs no one in the bathroom. No one in my office. Heโs not here.
We visit for an hour. I really want to tell them the tale of the first contact mission. I admit: itโs to brag. Itโs to make them think Iโm important or cool or just interesting. Or maybe itโs to let them know that Iโm more than a convicted criminal. That Iโm a good person.
When Jack asks what my job is in the camp, I simply say that Iโve been working for the government. Emma plays it up, says that Iโm working on projects to save the human race and that I may have already saved us once. Abby seems to have heard this before, or some version of it. She doesnโt look surprised. But Jack reacts as I hoped.
When theyโre leaving, Abby instructs Jack to take Sarah and wait in the anteroom by the front door.
To me, her voice low, she says, โI asked Alex if he wanted to come today. He said no.โ
I wait, not sure what to say.
โIโm glad you got to see the kids,โ Abby continues, sounding conflicted. โAlex and I havenโt told them anything about what happened. We donโt intend to. When theyโre old enough, weโll tell them. And they can decide for themselves what sort of relationship they want to have with you.โ
I nod.
โI came by because I felt like you would want to see them.โ โI do.โ
โAnd that you deserve to see them.โ I wait silently, sensing thereโs more.
โAnd also, because weโve been offered the chance to move into the habitat next door.โ
That surprises me. โReally?โ
โIt would beโฆโ Abby hesitates. โQuite an improvement from where we are now.โ
โI see.โ What is she asking me? It strikes me then. โDonโt worry. If Alex doesnโt want to see me, I wonโt make an issue of it. I wonโt come over, or confront him if I see him, or approach any of you if heโs with you.โ
Abby nods slowly, the stress draining away from her. I think she dreaded this conversation.
I change the subject. โAbby, Iโm so glad you all stopped by. Youโre welcome any time.โ