JOEY

“FUN FACT OF THE DAY: I officially have udders.” “Udders?”

“Yep. That’s right. I kid you not. Apparently, I produce milk now. By the bra full.”

“You’re leaking?” “Like a faulty tap.” “Shit.”

“Oh yeah, and fair warning, I haven’t seen my vagina since June, so you know what that means, don’t you?”

“No, Molloy, I really don’t.”

“It means you’ll be returning to The Amazon Rainforest of vaginas.” “Jesus.”

“Yep. Oh, and I have brown nipples.”

“You’ve always had brown nipples.”

“No, you’ve always had brown nipples,” she argued. “I’ve always had rosy-pink ones.”

“Well, a change is as good as a rest.”

“Also, that spiel they give you about oiling your stomach to prevent stretch marks is complete bullshit. I’ve been oiling, Joe. Three times a day, and your spawn still managed to bend me out of shape like a Stretch- Armstrong doll with varicose veins.” She sighed dramatically before adding, “I fear I may never wear my yellow bikini again.”

“Didn’t you buy that bikini when we were in second year?” “So?”

“So, maybe it doesn’t matter if you can’t fit into a bikini that you wore when you were fourteen?”

“Ugh, I hate it when you’re so logical,” she grumbled. “I think I liked you better when you were off your head and telling me whatever I wanted to hear.”

I laughed down the line. “Molloy, you only ever hear what you want anyway, so that’s a moot point.”

“A moot point?” she teased down the line. “Get you, mister fancy pants.

Practicing all the big words for Tommen, huh?”

“Don’t,” I groaned, resting my head against the wall. “I’m not doing it, Aoif.”

“Oh yes you are,” she argued back. “Come next month, my baby daddy is going to be a thorough-bred private school boy.” Bursting into a fit of snickering laughter, she added, “Blazer and all.”

“There is no fucking way that I am ever wearing a blazer to school,” I growled, repressing a shiver. “I would rather shit in my hands and clap.”

“Oh, smeared feces . How sexy.” “Give it a rest, will ya?”

“Hey now, you’re the one threatening to shit in your hands, drama queen,” she teased.

“They want to change me, Molloy. Make me into a whole different person. It’s not who I am. I’m me.”

“They don’t want to change you, Joe. They want to support you.” “I don’t get it.”

“I know you don’t, and that makes me love you even more.”

“You’re a dope.” “You love me.”

“Yeah.” I do. I smiled to myself. “So, did you get your leaving cert results yet? They came out this morning, right?”

“Yeah,” she sighed dramatically. “But I haven’t been over to the school to collect them yet.”

“Why the hell not?”

“Because I didn’t want to miss your call.”

“Molloy.” Guilt sucker punched me in the chest. “You need to go and get your results.”

 

 

“I failed.”

My heart sank.

“What do you mean you failed?”

“I mean I failed the leaving cert in spectacular fashion.” “Molloy.”

“It’s not all bad,” she was quick to say. “Kev got six hundred points. So, he’ll be heading off to his top choice university.”

Like I gave a shit what her brother got.

“Let’s see.” I heard her sigh sadly as the sound of paper ruffling filled my ears. “D in Business. E in Irish. E in Maths. E in History. Oh, I got a C in Biology. D in English. Oh, and another D in Home Ec.”

“I’m sorry, queen.”

“Yep.” Another heavy sigh. “Want some more crappy news?” “What?”

“I didn’t get in.” “To St. John’s?”

“The rejection letter came yesterday.” Fuck.

“So, yeah, stud, it turns out you’re not the only one heading back to school.”

I frowned. “You’re going back to school?”

“According to Mam and Dad, I have to repeat sixth year, which I am absolutely not doing.” She released a frustrated growl. “I mean, it was hard enough last year. How the hell am I supposed to focus this time around with a baby to look after?”

“Aoif.” Jesus, I could hardly speak I was so laden down with guilt. “I’m so fucking sorry, baby.”

“It’s not on you, Joe.” Yeah.

It was.

“Trish wants you to repeat, huh?” I knew it would be Trish, because Tony wasn’t the school promotor type. In his mind, if you could read, write, count money, and had a good head on your shoulders, then you would make your way just fine in life. Trish, on the other hand, was the one gunning for her kids to make something of themselves.

“Yep,” she replied. “Mam thinks it’ll be good for me to get it done. She’s been in contact with Mr. Nyhan, and he’s been really good about it – all things considered. He told Mam the school will work with me, you know, sending homework and stuff, and that I don’t have to attend in person until after the Halloween break.”

“Jesus.” I scrubbed my jaw, feeling overwhelmed for her.

“Mam offered to mind the baby for me if I go back to school, but I’m not doing it, Joe.”

Anxiety filled me.

All these plans and decisions were being made without me.

“What about me?” I heard myself interject. “I can have the baby while you go to school. I’ll find evening work that’ll fit our schedule.”

“And Tommen? Where does that fit in?” “It doesn’t.”

“You’re going to do this, Joe.”

“No, Molloy. I’m going to take care of you and the baby.”

“Yes, by finishing out school,” she pushed. “At least that way our baby has one parent to be proud of.”

Fuck, that stung.

“There’s nothing about me to be proud of,” I told her. “You’re the good one, Aoif. You’re the parent our kid will be proud of.”

“Listen to you with all the compliments.”

“Seriously, you do the whole school gig by day, and I’ll have the baby, and then I’ll work at night while you’re with him.”

“Yeah, because my dad’s really going to go for that.”

I rolled my eyes. “He can fire me, but he can’t keep me from my kid.” “That’s not it, Joe,” she was quick to say. “He loves you. You know he

does. He’s just… protective of me after everything that happened.”

“You mean after I left you alone and pregnant.” “He knows you had to go.”

“He might know it, but he doesn’t accept it.”

“Well, I do, and that’s all that matters,” she replied. “So, don’t let it get you down. You and Dad will patch things up when you’re home. You guys always do.”

Yeah, somehow, I doubted that.

I’d overheard Tony ranting and raving the other night when she was on the phone to me.

He didn’t want me going anywhere near his daughter, and I didn’t blame him. Jesus, it was a miracle he hadn’t confiscated her phone to stop me from calling. I sure as hell wouldn’t blame him if he did. I’d put his daughter through hell.

“He’ll give you back your job at the garage once he sees how well you’re doing,” Molloy said down the line. “Maybe not right away, but he will. Dad never replaced you. He never hired anyone else, Joe.”

“I really fucking hope you’re right, Molloy,” I said honestly. Because they could talk about college degrees to me until the cows came home, but the only career I’d ever been interested in pursuing was under the bonnet of a car.