OVER A WEEK LATER, Finn had finally set up a meeting with his contact, Jo. I wasn’t sure what took her so long. Normally, I’d fully vet any guest guides we took on our trips, but we were short-staffed this season and I was getting desperate. When he said we’d meet back at The Pidge for a few drinks, I wasn’t thrilled.
All week I’d been nagged by a bad feeling. Fuck if I knew what it meant, but if the nightmares kept up, I’d go fucking crazy. They still dogged me at least once a week, but this week it was relentless. Every fucking night, I woke up dripping with sweat and panicked. Only bits and pieces would come back to me. Usually, I was chasing someone, or they were chasing me, and I was always in my combat gear.
In one dream last week, I’d been running, my boots feeling like lead. Finally, I’d caught up to them, and when I grabbed whoever I was chasing
—when I caught the person’s arm, they turned, and I realized I’d been chasing a woman. A beautiful woman with dark blond hair and the most intense green-gray eyes I’d ever seen. Her hair tumbled around her shoulders as the wind whipped past us. I tried to reach for her again, but she brought a finger to her mouth. Shhh. She smiled as massive wings unfolded from her back. In an instant, she was gone.
I was losing my goddamned mind.
After my third beer and ready to get the fuck home, I looked back at Finn in time to see his head lift and his eyes light up. I turned to follow his gaze to a woman who walked through the heavy wood door. The warm summer air swept in with her, cutting through the cologne and sweat of the dance floor. Her hair billowed slightly, and a coal burned in my chest.
She started toward us, her dark blond hair swirling around her shoulders, and heat started to spread through me, not exactly panic, but something close. I looked around—could anyone else see her? Was I losing my shit?
I turned to Finn. “Who is that?”
He looked at me like I was an idiot. “It’s her. Jo. I asked her to meet us here.”
“Where’d you meet her again?” I asked, not believing my eyes.
“Dude, are you ok? We met in college. She lived in Chikalu for like, six years.”
With a buzzing in my ears, I let my gaze wander down to see she wore a simple fitted T-shirt, but it did nothing to hide a pair of knockout tits. As Finn stood up, my mouth went dry, and my dick immediately paid attention. I could appreciate beautiful women of all shapes and sizes, but there was something so understated about the way she dressed in nothing more than a black shirt and tight jeans with a tear in the knee.
She moved through the people milling at the end of the bar. Silently, she slipped through the crowd, occasionally stopping to shake hands with some of the men at the bar, giving a smile and a nod to a couple at another table.
As she approached our table, I was hit with the full force of her smile. I stood—Mom would have been proud I remembered my manners.
I had never seen a woman so naturally gorgeous in all of my life. I felt a hot pull straight in my groin and had to adjust my hips to hide my growing attraction.
Finn scooped her up and spun in a circle, earning him a quick and genuine laugh. It took actual effort to tear my eyes away from her. Her tight jeans spread across a full, firm ass. Goddamn, she had a nice ass. As if my dick wasn’t on full alert already, I could feel the blood rushing between my legs, and I shifted against the stool to hide my obvious arousal.
“My girl Jo! You made it!” Gently setting her down and earning him a hip check, Finn opened his body and turned to me. “Linc, Joanna—Jo, my big brother, Lincoln. I can’t believe you two have never met!” His dimpled grin spread wide across his face.
Holy shit. Jo. Jo . . . No fucking way. Is this Joanna? She lived here for six years—went to college with Finn. Finn’s girlfriend is Joanna? Fuck. FUCK!
My thoughts shattered in my brain, with no hope of forming a cohesive thought. I couldn’t stand the uncomfortable feeling growing in my chest.
“Hey,” I said.
Real fucking smooth. I sat, elbows on the table, and all I could focus on was my beer in front of me and the fact that the woman I hadn’t been able to shake for the last seven years was not only possibly standing right in front of me but clearly the object of my little brother’s major crush.
“Uh . . . ok.” Finn looked at me suspiciously but turned toward Jo. “All right, honey, let’s get you a drink. Beer?”
Glancing at the table, she grabbed a shot full of dark liquid and slung it back, without answering. “Uggh. Shit . . . whiskey?” She let out a small cough.
Clapping a hand down on her back, Finn shouted, “Hell yeah!” pumping both fists in the air. “Let’s get you a chaser.”
With a head nod, Finn caught the eye of the waitress. Misty? Mandy?
And she winked as he held up his beer and three fingers.
“Hi, Lincoln, it’s nice to finally meet you. Finn’s told me a lot about you.”
Her easy smile lit up her eyes, and for a moment, I was lost in them. Were they green? Gray? It was hard to tell in the dim lighting of the bar, but in that moment, I wanted to drown in their familiarity. Instead of responding like a normal human, I just nodded and looked back out over the dancers on the floor. I had to stop thinking about what that tight body would feel like underneath mine. I was being such a tool.
Finn pulled out the stool between us, and she slipped onto it, her knee gently grazing my thigh. I couldn’t stop thinking about whether Jo had written the letters, and I touched my hand to what remained of the tattered wings tattooed on my forearm. They were barely recognizable, shredded from my injuries, but they were there. The movement of my hand caught her eye, and I took my arm off the table.
Finn kept his hand casually on the back of her chair, and they turned their attention to the dance floor. He leaned in close and whispered something in her ear, and she laughed, shaking her head. It was bubbly and light against the heavy bass of the music. Irrational jealousy flared in my chest. I didn’t even know this girl, and I couldn’t stand the overprotective way I was feeling right now.
Rubbing my damp hands down my thighs, I stood again to stretch my legs and try to get a grip on myself when Finn grabbed Jo by the hand and pulled her toward the crowded dance floor. She pulled back slightly, laughing, but let him lead her out onto the floor, and they swayed to a slow country song. Finn dramatically twirled her and ended with a dip. She laughed again.
Fucker.
Taking a deep pull of my beer, I let my eyes travel down her body and across her curves. I felt the familiar rush of arousal and couldn’t stop myself from appreciating the feminine dip of her waist, the swell of her hips and thighs.
I couldn’t help but wonder how her body would feel against me if I cut into their dance. Wrapped my arms around her waist. Took a deep inhale of her hair, my nose grazing her neck, and letting her scent overtake me. Let my hands glide down over her ass. Or the warmth of her skin under her shirt as my hand moved up her back, pulling her in closer to me. The things I could do to this girl if she were mine.
“Got those beers for ya, handsome.” Interrupting my thoughts, the waitress set the beers at the table with a hard rattle. She followed my eyes to Finn and Jo.
“Well, they look cozy.” She smirked. “She’s a lucky woman, that one. Everyone’s been dying to get a piece of Finn, but he doesn’t seem to have eyes for any of the women around here . . .”
She walked away, her words filling me with a sickening sense of dread as a cold sweat pricked the base of my neck. Even if she was Joanna, which I still didn’t know for sure, and the sexiest woman I’d ever laid eyes on, I could see she was already Finn’s. I could feel my arousal shift back to the uncomfortable tightness in my chest.
This is wrong. You’re better than this. You couldn’t do that to your brother, Marine. Get that shit on lock.
Throwing cash on the table, I grabbed my jacket from my stool and headed for the door. I might have promised Finn we’d hang out tonight and figure out our work shit, but I was damn sure not going to torture myself.
Instead, I’d go home, take a cold shower, and get some rest. I had no idea that I’d lay awake in the dark for hours, staring at the black ceiling, thinking about the woman in the letters, Jo, if they were one and the same,
and wonder if I’d spent the last seven years attached to a woman who was going home tonight with my brother.