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Chapter no 11 – โ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€ŒLipsโ€Œ

ELORA by Beanie Harper

Elora

T

 

he hot water engulfed me, cascading over my shoulders while I brushed the conditioner out of my hair. I still had time to rinse it; Iโ€™d

made sure of that. It was a lazy shower day,ย a Saturday, and I had all the time in the world to get as clean or relaxed as I wanted. It didnโ€™t matter that my schedule was messed upโ€“heck! Falling asleep on the couch last night had messed up my schedule, but I couldnโ€™t be fussed. Normally, I would have been annoyed, but Iโ€™d been so comfortable in Luciferโ€™s arms that Iโ€™d just passed out.

It was pretty early for a weekend, being around 8 in the morning, but I never was the type to sleep in late. I must admit that waking up in last nightโ€™s outfit was a bit annoying. Whoever carried me to bed couldnโ€™t have woken me up long enough so I could change? Then again, I guess I shouldโ€™ve considered myself lucky they didnโ€™t just leave me on the couch.

After turning off the water, I reached out to grab my towel, only to be met with the coldโ€“and rather barrenโ€“towel rod. Knitting my brows together, I pushed my shower curtain aside and looked around my bathroom for my much-needed covering.ย Dang it!ย Another repercussion of falling asleep on the couch last night: I didnโ€™t have the chance to leave a towel out.

I closed the curtain and squeezed the water out of my hair as best I could. โ€œCan someone bring me a towel, please?โ€ I asked, knowing they could hear me.

It wasnโ€™t like me to be so disorganized. I knew it wasnโ€™t a big deal, but I still couldnโ€™t believe I didnโ€™t at least check the towel rod before getting in.

โ€œElora,โ€ Duke called out as he entered my bathroom.

โ€œThank you! Iโ€™m not usually such an airhead,โ€ I joked, giggling softly. I stuck my arm out of the shower, my hand opening and closing in a typical

โ€˜grabbyโ€™ gesture. โ€œI guess it serves me right for passing out on the couch, huh?โ€

His fingertips brushed against my hand as he passed me the after- shower garment, and I felt the strange tingles at the contact. Instantly, my stomach fluttered, but I quickly grabbed the towel and covered myself, trying to ignore it.

Breaking the slight silence, Duke cleared his throat. He sounded uncomfortable, though not incredibly so. โ€œYou were exhausted. I think you should take more time for yourself. I donโ€™t think being as… involved in school activities as you are is good for your well-being,โ€ he commented.

โ€œYou sound like Theo.โ€ I pulled the shower curtain and raised an eyebrow at him, daring him to keep going.

Duke froze for a few seconds, his eyes scanning my form quickly before just as rapidly fixing on the sink. โ€œIโ€™m just saying itโ€™s okay to relax,โ€ he mumbled, though he suddenly seemed tenseโ€“more so than before.

โ€œYou should take your own advice,โ€ I teased, poking him in the stomach with a toothbrush. Iโ€™d only just grabbed it, ready to put toothpaste on the bristles, but I couldnโ€™t resist jabbing him with it.

He was growing more flustered by the second, and I didnโ€™t understand why. Heโ€™d seen me in much less than a towel before, albeit I was little and hadnโ€™t physically matured. Still, I wasnโ€™t flashing him. I was covered by a towel, for goodness sake!

Duke backed up to the door, looking like he was trying to find an escape route. โ€œThis isnโ€™t the most appropriate time to have a conversation,โ€ he fretted before clearing his throat again.

With a shrug, I leaned a hip against the counter and finally started brushing my teeth. That didnโ€™t mean I stopped watching him. As a matter of fact, I smiled, but could anyone blame me? He looked all flustered and cute.ย Cute?ย Bad Elora!

I gave him an amused smile before gesturing to myself. โ€œItโ€™s a towel, Duke. Iโ€™m not naked.โ€ Had he already forgotten the hundreds of baths, showers, and clothing changes heโ€™d given me as a child? What a weirdo.

โ€œFelix is taking us all out on the boat today,โ€ he stated on his way out of my bathroom, ignoring my statement completely. He left the door slightly ajar, nearly closed but not quite.

Good thing he said that, too; I took his words into consideration by picking out a swimsuit and shorts as my outfit for the day. It was a white set

with slightly cheeky bottoms and a decently conservative top. Paired with unbuttoned, light-wash denim shorts, I looked perfect for a nice day by the water.

Honestly, I loved boat days! It had been so long since Felix had taken us out on the lake. I assumed weโ€™d be taking his pontoon; that was my favorite.

After styling my hair by putting it in two loose braids, I went downstairs. Everyone was already in the kitchen, clad in swim trunks and t- shirts, typical for a day out in the sun. Theo and Felix were the exceptions (being that they were completely shirtless). For a second, I found myself ogling their muscles.

Quin was busy cooking breakfast, so naturally, I gravitated to him. He always let me taste-test his creations, and I was hungry. I padded over to him, peeking around his body to see what was on the stove.

A green glob of grossness sizzled in the pan in place of eggs or bacon, and I widened my eyes at the sight of it. โ€œWhatโ€™s that?โ€ I asked politely, not wanting to show my reservations about theโ€ฆ vegetable?

Quin glanced down at me. โ€œItโ€™s a healthy breakfast, making up for your ice cream dinner last night.โ€

I crossed my arms and shot him a sharp look. โ€œIs it… edible?โ€

โ€œDonโ€™t give me sass,โ€ Quin reprimanded, his eyes narrowed as he mimicked my stance. Oops. โ€œOf course, itโ€™s edible. I wouldnโ€™t give you something you canโ€™t eat.โ€

โ€œItโ€™s poisoned,โ€ Theo mumbled, even though everyone could hear him just fine.

Out of curiosity, I looked at Theo only to find him smirking as he smugly awaited Quinโ€™s reaction.

The vampire in question pointed the spatula at him. โ€œJust your portion.โ€

A question popped into my head at his retort. โ€œCanย vampires be poisoned?โ€ I thought nothing could kill them.

There was a mix of yeses and nos, including a โ€˜sort ofโ€™ somewhere in the chaos. I pressed my lips together. โ€œThat was super clear, thanks,โ€ I deadpanned.

Dane shook his head. โ€œVampires cannot be poisoned. Nothing lethal to us would survive in our blood,โ€ he explained.

โ€œYes, we canโ€“thereโ€™s one herb that makes us feel like we are on the brink of death but does not kill us,โ€ Felix argued.

Quin turned and looked between his friends. โ€œSilphium went extinct thousands of years ago,โ€ he dismissed.

Accepting that answer, I walked over and sat between Eugene and Lucifer. I tried to tell myself it was because I wanted their company, but we all knew it was because they had sweets on their plates. I honestly didnโ€™t know if I could actually stomach Quinโ€™s โ€˜healthy breakfast.โ€™

As they continued to bicker over my question, I tried to sweet-talk myself into whatever goodie Lucifer was eating. It looked like a cream cheese danish.

With the best puppy-dog eyes I could muster, I blinked up at him. โ€œGood morning,โ€ I chirped with a cutesy smile.

As expected, he peered down at me but said nothing back. I felt both his and Eugeneโ€™s hands rest just above my knees, and a faint tickling feeling followed. It shot through my legs, warmth spreading along my thighs. My brain tried to figure out what that feeling was; It was so unfamiliar, but I probably just needed to pee.

โ€œAre you excited to go on the boat?โ€ I asked playfully.

Eugene nodded. โ€œBoats have never been my favorite, but seeing as todayโ€™s going to be scalding, yes.โ€

Bringing my full attention back to Lucifer, I urged him to answer too. I didnโ€™t know why, but I had wanted to hear his voice lately. It had such a calming tone to it now, much different than I remembered.

He looked at me for a few seconds, clearly calculating whether he should reply or not. I kept patiently waiting. โ€œNo,โ€ he murmured, but the corners of his mouth turned slightly up in (what looked like) an amused smile.

Lucifer was lying; I could tell. He had always refused to go boating with us before. Why go now if he wasnโ€™t happy about it?โ€™ It didnโ€™t make any sense.

Whateverโ€“it didnโ€™t matter; what did matter was pastries. I was about to jokingly beg Lucifer for a crumb of his danish but stopped myself. There was a time in my life that I had to beg people for the tiniest morsel of food. I wasnโ€™t always as lucky as I was now, so I should have been grateful for the food Quin made me, even though it looked absolutely disgusting.

My shoulders slumped in surrender, and I looked away from the pastry as Quin walked over to me with a plate. With a forced smile, I mumbled a โ€˜thanksโ€™ and took a bite of the green gelatinous mass.

Ick! Ick ick ick. It tasted like he blended eggs with kale, celery, cucumber, and every other green vegetable we had in the kitchen, cooked it, and made an omelet. Still, I reluctantly ate the entire dish, earning a pleased look from Quin.

Theo looked disturbed at my empty plate. โ€œI canโ€™t believe you ate that thing.โ€

โ€œIt wasnโ€™t my favorite, but it wasnโ€™t horrible,โ€ I lied with a shrug, not wanting to hurt Quinโ€™s feelings.

Quin shot me a soft look, somehow knowing I wasnโ€™t telling the truth. โ€œIf you didnโ€™t like it, you didnโ€™t have to eat it,โ€ he replied.

Fair enough. I grabbed one of Luciferโ€™s sweets, not bothering to ask permission, before I took a bite and savored the pastryโ€™s sugary taste. โ€œNever make that again,โ€ I said.

 

 

โ€œHave you decided on what you want to do yet?โ€ Dane asked me, seemingly out of nowhere.

Weโ€™d been on the boat for a few hours, just chatting and having fun. They were all shirtless while I was shorts-less, hoping to get tanโ€“though it seemed my eyes had a mind of their own, sneaking peeks at the men without my permission.

I shifted in my seat, stretching my legs out as I did so. โ€œIโ€™ve wanted to be an anesthesiologist since I was ten, you know that,โ€ I responded. Iโ€™d make a lot of money and not have to deal with any actual blood; it was a win-win.

โ€œFor your birthday, Elora,โ€ he clarified with a chuckle.

โ€œOh, right.โ€ I blushed, shrugging while I thought about it for a second. โ€œI donโ€™t know. As long as I get a cake, Iโ€™m happy.โ€

Duke leaned forward with a small smile. โ€œThere isnโ€™t anything specific you want? You only get one nineteenth birthday.โ€

โ€œItโ€™s just another year older,โ€ I replied with another shrug. โ€œAs long as I get cake, Iโ€™m happy.โ€

My โ€˜birthdayโ€™ was the day that Duke found me. He decided that since I didnโ€™t know my actual birthday, we would replace it with my โ€˜adoptionโ€™ day. I knew I was already older than four when he saved me, so I was probably closer to twenty, but no one was really counting.

โ€œYouโ€™ll actually be able to vote this year!โ€ Theo faked enthusiasm, clearly not caring about politics. Last year wasnโ€™t an election year, so sadly, I missed out. However, I was delighted that Iโ€™d be able to contribute this year.

It always seemed like they were more excited about my birthday than I was; it seemed like this year was no different.

โ€œYouโ€™re eighteen?โ€ Lucifer added in his usual hushed tone. I could tell he was thinking hard, probably calculating the years theyโ€™d been gone. โ€œYouโ€™re legal,โ€ he said, primarily to himself, but the rest of the group easily heard him.

Everyone gave him a sharp look. Dane and Duke appeared especially irked. On the other hand, Theo was smirking and shaking his head; clearly amused by whatever Lucifer had said.

I felt my brows furrow. Legal? โ€œWhat does that mean?โ€ I questioned.

Eugene groaned, running his hands down his face before glaring at his friend. โ€œThanks, Lucifer.โ€

Theo scoffed. โ€œHow did the education system fail you this badly?โ€ He asked in disbelief.

Confused, I shrugged.

Felix sighed from where he sat, still seemingly focused on steering the boat. โ€œLegal means youโ€™re of age to consent,โ€ he remarked, briefly glancing my way. โ€œYou know what that means, right?โ€

Oh. Thatโ€™s awkward. Thatโ€™s very awkward.ย Why the heck would Lucifer say that?! Sex made me very uncomfortable, and I tried not to think about it, much less talk about it, especially with them.

โ€œIt means if we donโ€™t change the subject, Iโ€™m going to throw myself overboard,โ€ I mumbled.

Dane sucked in a breath. โ€œMe tooโ€“anyways, you really donโ€™t want to have your friends over for a party or something?โ€ He quicklyโ€“and successfullyโ€“changed the subject.

โ€œNot really,โ€ I replied with a shake of my head. Iโ€™d never been invited to anyone elseโ€™s parties, so I didnโ€™t feel the need to include them in mine. I

didnโ€™t have any close friends I wouldโ€™ve wanted there anyway. With a bright smile, I added: โ€œIโ€™m just happy with it being usโ€“and aย hugeย cake.โ€

Wanting to move on as well, I stood up and walked over to Felix. โ€œCan I steer?โ€

Felix eyed me briefly before nodding, gesturing for me to sit in his lap.

I beamed, wasting no time sitting on his legs. Tingles erupted on my back where our skin touched. They were just like the ones Iโ€™d gotten from Duke yesterday, and while I wanted to ask about them, I was also embarrassed. Luckily, the tingles felt… good; not quite like the feel of the sun kissing my skin, but something else entirely. Iโ€™d never felt anything like it and liked it, but I thought it best to keep it to myself for the time being.

Interrupting my thoughts, Felix wrapped his arm around my stomach, resting his large hand resting on my hip. I knew it was not aย realย hug, and he was acting more as a seatbelt than anything, but I was going to count it as a hug.

โ€œKeep it straight for now. Iโ€™ll tell you when to turn,โ€ he instructed. โ€œYou got it, captain,โ€ I joked with a dramatic salute.

The idea of being able to vote made me think. Vampires didnโ€™t really have presidents. At least, not that I knew about. Their world was very different from mine, and Iโ€™d never really questioned it before. โ€œIn your world, do you have a president? Is someone in charge of all vampires? Or do you all just do whatever you want?โ€ I asked, glancing at everyone.

โ€œNot exactly,โ€ Theo replied with his signature smirk. โ€œThousands of years ago, when the very first vampires came into existence, they were declaredโ€ฆย royals.ย They ruled for thousands of years, but eventually, they were killed by rogue werewolves, starting the feud between our kind and theirs.โ€

โ€œSo, there was never another person chosen as a leader?โ€ I inferred.

Eugene turned towards me. โ€œThereโ€™s no election or choosing. Power and status are dependent on age. The older we are, the stronger we are. We can develop abilities with age that others will never have,โ€ he clarified.

โ€œLike superpowers?โ€ I teased.

My back moved while Felix laughed behind me. โ€œLucifer can get into peoplesโ€™ heads and read their minds. Back in the day, when we needed information, we… persuaded our enemies into allowing him into their minds. Itโ€™s incredibly advantageous. I donโ€™t know another vampire whoโ€™s

developed an ability quite like his,โ€ he disclosed as he grabbed the wheel from me, seeing as I wasnโ€™t paying attention.

My eyebrows rose. โ€œLucifer, you can read minds?โ€ I asked in awe.

Thatโ€™s cool!

Lucifer looked at me through his dark sunglasses and nodded. He somehow had found the only shaded area on the boat and hadnโ€™t received a drop of sunlight during our sailing.

โ€œIsnโ€™t that what you already do, though? You can talk to each other in your heads,โ€ I mused aloud. Mind reading wasnโ€™t that useful if he could already do that as a vampire.

Duke shook his head. โ€œNo, the mind-link is different. We choose what we say to one another, like talking. If someone allows Lucifer in their mind, he has access to every thought they have. With that access, he could take over their mind, senses, and body, essentially using them as a puppet.โ€

I eyed Lucifer curiously. I never really thought anything mean about anyone and doubted I would in the future. Why not test it? โ€œOkay, prove it,โ€ I challenged while turning sideways in Felixโ€™s lap. โ€œTell me what Iโ€™m thinkingโ€“โ€

โ€œElora, you donโ€™t want to do that,โ€ Dane cautioned, his expression severe and stern.

โ€œI agree. You donโ€™t want someone prying into your head. Donโ€™t give him permission so easily,โ€ Duke advised.

โ€œOh, come on,โ€ I dismissed their worries with a smile and roll of my eyes. โ€œIโ€™m not worried.โ€

โ€œYouโ€™ll never be able to kick him out once heโ€™s in. Wherever you are, he has full access to your mind. Usually, Iโ€™d be all for it, but trust me, this is aย bad idea,โ€ Theo stated, giving me a similar discouraging look.

What were they so worried about? It was Lucifer! He would leave me and my mind alone if I asked him to; I was sure of it. With a smile, I gave Lucifer my permission to enter my head. โ€œDo it. Tell me what Iโ€™m thinking.โ€

Lucifer straightened, seeming intrigued as he watched me before satisfaction washed over his face. โ€œAs you wish,โ€ he whispered.

Suddenly, there was the softest flutter in the back of my mind. It was strange and felt odd, but (somehow) I knew he was there. I could feel his consciousness prodding gently, and I wasnโ€™t sure whether or not I liked the feeling of it. It was definitely bizarre.

Everyone seemed tense, but my gaze was fixed on Lucifer. He tilted his head. โ€œIโ€™ve never had access to a human mind before. Itโ€™s mystifying,โ€ he mumbled.

I raised my eyebrows, surprised by his comment. How was my mind different from anyone elseโ€™s? I knew there were vampires and werewolves, but they were still cognitive beings with thoughts and feelings like I did.

Lucifer shook his head. โ€œYouโ€™reย cold, exhausted, your thoughts are slow, you canโ€™t smell the salt in the air, and youโ€™re still mad at Duke.โ€

Immediately, I flinched back. Luciferโ€™s voice in my mind shocked the smile right off my face. Heโ€™d just spoken to me… telepathically. I didnโ€™t like that and pushed myself back into Felix as I could, as though he could protect me. A personโ€™s mind was their own; they were never supposed to hear someone elseโ€™s voice in their thoughts. It was beyond unsettling and my own dang fault.

โ€œI told you,โ€ Duke grumbled, shaking his head at my reaction.

โ€œSheโ€™s annoyed because no one ever answered her question,โ€ Lucifer revealed as he relaxed, resting his head against the back of his seat.

Was I? I guess I must have been. It was true; no one had ever told me who was in charge.

Felix tightened his arm around me. โ€œAs the last vampire with royal blood, I am the ruler over vampires,โ€ he confessed with pride.

โ€œYou? How did I not know that?โ€ My eyes widened, and all of my attention was instantaneously on him. I shouldnโ€™t have been surprised; Felix had always been stern, exuding power just by demeanor alone. For him to be the leader of vampires… that mustโ€™ve meant all of them were in positions of power.

Felix smirked at my surprised reaction. โ€œIt wouldnโ€™t have made a difference if you knew or not,โ€ he answered.

He was right. Nothing could ever change how much I loved them. I felt uneasy knowing that the most powerful vampires in the world chose to helpย me. They went on missions that I now understood were part of their leadership duties, making themselves responsible for peace and war alike. Wouldnโ€™t I have been a burden?

โ€œYouโ€™reย overthinking. Duke took you in because you needed help. Itโ€™s the best decision weโ€™ve ever made. Donโ€™t doubt that for a second,โ€ย Luciferโ€™s voice echoed in my mind.

I brought my eyes to meet his, only to see him already looking at me. I smiled at him before turning to look at the sunset.

A mix of pinks and oranges painted the sky, and I felt happy. No matter what Lucifer thought, I wasnโ€™t mad at Duke. I just wished heโ€™d never left and I didnโ€™t miss all those years with him.

Now that they were all back and I had all my guys with me, I felt complete. All of my missing puzzle pieces were falling into place. I just wish I knew why it felt different than before.

 

 

Walking into the kitchen the next day, I saw Dane sitting on his usual stool at the counter. He was typing away at his laptop, as usual. Sometimes I wondered if he worked too hard, but then I remembered that they couldnโ€™t really get exhausted. They didnโ€™t even have to work; they were billionaires, after all. Anything extra they chose to do was just to build their own equity.

Lazy Sundays had always been a tradition everyone respected in our house, and Iโ€™d always appreciated it. Today, I enjoyed it even more. Unfortunately (and despite Dukeโ€™s repeated insistence for sunscreen), Iโ€™d gotten a slight sunburn on my shoulders. To avoid agitating the burn, Iโ€™d dressed in a sports bra with a white camisole and soft gray sweatpants to complete my โ€˜loungeโ€™ look.

โ€œWhatcha doing?โ€ I asked as I sat beside Dane, absentmindedly grabbing a mandarin orange to peel.

His dark red eyes shifted from his screen to mine, and he smiled. โ€œNothing interesting. Whereโ€™s Quin? Shouldnโ€™t he be whipping you up something to eat?โ€ He teased me.

โ€œHe chooses to cook for me. I neverย expectย anything,โ€ I giggled, though my words were honest. With a shrug, I continued: โ€œIโ€™m not very hungry anyway.โ€

We sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes as I picked all those gross white stringy things off of my orange. If it was not perfect, I couldnโ€™t

eat it. One time, I spent half an hour peeling one only to throw it away when pulling the top didnโ€™t pull the entire stringy core out.

I glanced up at Dane again, noticing his hair was a little longer than he usually kept it. For as long as I could remember, he never let his hair touch his ears. Now, it was almost half an inch past his ears. I knit my brows together. โ€œAre you okay?โ€ I asked.

Dane stopped typing and turned to me, tilting his head once his eyes met mine. โ€œOf course. Why do you ask?โ€

โ€œI think youโ€™re stressed out about something. You never let your hair get this long,โ€ I observed, reaching out to touch his locks as I spoke.

It seemed my words had broken through his walls because his shoulders sagged ever so slightly in reply. He stared at me for what seemed like forever as my fingers absentmindedly played with his mane. My eyes roamed his face, trying to figure out what was troubling him and what was making him look at me the way he currently was. There was something he wanted to tell me; I could see it in his eyes.

My eyebrows rose as I wondered if I had done something to cause his stress. He knew my schedule better than I did. If memorizing my games and club meets was too much on his plate, he should have just told me. โ€œDid I do something?โ€ I questioned softly.

With a gentle smile, he cupped his hand on my cheek and ran his thumb along my cheekbone. โ€œNo, sweetheart. Not intentionally,โ€ he added before he closed his laptop, got up, and walked out of the kitchen.

My hand fell in my lap, and I realized my fingertips feltย normal.ย I didnโ€™t notice it, but the tingles were there again when I touched his hair.

At first, I thought the feeling might have been a weird coincidenceโ€“that whatever part of my body touched them got sensitive and fuzzy. Now, I didnโ€™t know what to think. Iโ€™d never felt those little sparks before the others came home, but I had recently caught myself wanting to touch them more since feeling them. I liked how it feltโ€“how I felt when they touched me.

I stared at my hand, wondering what Dane meant. He didnโ€™t seem mad at me for whatever Iย unintentionallyย did. He looked more cautious than anything.

Hearing someone enter the room, I snapped out of my thoughts. Looking up, I smiled at Duke, who appeared in the doorway. He was wearing gray sweatpants and a white t-shirt. โ€œWeโ€™re matching,โ€ I noticed.

He nodded and held a hand out for me. โ€œI dressed for a day in the library. Would you like to join me?โ€

Hopping off my stool and grabbing his hand, I felt the same tingles. Despite everything, I really missed him. โ€œWhat are we going to read?โ€ I asked.

He led us through the house until we finally reached the gigantic library. Iโ€™d always loved it here. The architecture throughout the whole house was beautiful. Still, the high arches and woodwork in the library had always been breathtakingly beautiful and unique.

The castleโ€™s library held hundreds of thousands of books and was three times the size of our local town library. While I did love the room, I alsoย despisedย it. Every single book was out of order. Iโ€™d tried many times to begin organizing it, but with shelves so high (nearly twenty feet off the ground!) and the sheer number of books, it was impossible. Truthfully, I felt uneasy in this room because of it. I hated thinking about the disorganization; it made my skin crawl.

โ€œWhatever you choose. I just wanted to spend time with you,โ€ he admitted.

My chest warmed up at his words, and I felt happy.ย About time. I knew we needed to talk; weโ€™d been avoiding it. Now, I think I knew what to say to him.

โ€œWe should pick a random one!โ€ I beamed up at him. I didnโ€™t have anything particular in mind, and Eugene said it was always good to try new things.

โ€œPick one,โ€ Duke chuckled as he let go of my hand.

I looked up and down the aisles, trying to find an interesting book that I typically wouldnโ€™t have picked. โ€œThis one looks good; what do you think?โ€ I held it up to him.

Before we knew it, we were seated on one of the leather couches in the library. Duke was sitting on the loveseat, and I was in his lap. Why sit by myself when he was right there?

Theo frequently called me a โ€˜level-ten-clinger.โ€™ Quin blamed my touchy-feely nature on Duke carrying me too much as a kid. I didnโ€™t care, though; I just liked being around them. The guys never complained, so I was going to continue invading their personal space as much as I wanted.

Stretching my legs onto the cushion, I rested my head on his shoulder. The book was in my hands as I read aloud. I wasnโ€™t sure Duke was even

listening, not when I was also having difficulties focusing. He was running his hand through my hair like he used to when I was younger, and it was making my head fuzzy.

Duke knew me inside and out. He had learned all my soft spots, recognizing them better than I ever could.

I closed the book after a few chapters. Turning towards him, I positioned myself so that my legs were on either side of him in an effort to meet his eyes. โ€œDuke?โ€ I started.

He narrowed his eyes at me but hummed a soft, โ€œHm?โ€

With my bottom lip pulled between my teeth, I peered at the collar of his shirt and attempted to gather my thoughts. I looked up at him. โ€œWhy did you stop calling?โ€ I asked.

His eyes softened as he studied me and sucked in a breath. โ€œI wanted to. When time zones and schedules changed, it got hard. And after months of no contact, I couldnโ€™t bear the thought of you watching the phone ring as I called,โ€ he explained.

โ€œI wouldnโ€™t have ignored you, though.โ€ I looked away again. Heโ€™d thought I was mad at him and purposely dodging his calls. That was why heโ€™d stopped callingโ€“because it hurt him too much.

He began to rub my back gently. โ€œHearing your voice made me want to drop everything and go home. I couldnโ€™t do that. Thatโ€™s another reason I stopped calling. The sooner I finished my duties there, the sooner I could get back to you…โ€ He trailed off sadly.

With his other hand, he grabbed my chin and made me look back at him. โ€œElora, there wasnโ€™t an hour that went by that I didnโ€™t regret leaving. I promise youโ€™ll never feel that way again,โ€ Duke whispered, his crimson eyes filled with sincerity.

To stop it from wobbling, I bit my bottom lip again and nodded. A ball swelled in my throat, and I couldnโ€™t speak. I wished I had known that a long time ago. Iโ€™d spent years thinking that being away was easy for him. Now, I knew he was hurting just as much as I was.

Before, it was Duke and me against the world. In his absence, Iโ€™d gained that same respect with all my other guys. As much as Iโ€™d missed him, there was good thatโ€™d come from it. If he had never left, I wouldnโ€™t have gotten as close as I had with Eugene, Quin, Theo, and Dane.

I swallowed the lump and smiled. โ€œI love you, Duke.โ€ I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him tight.

He hugged me back. โ€œI love you too, Baby.โ€

I stayed in his arms for (what seemed like) a long time, letting tingles spread through me like wildfire. I could have stayed in his arms foreverโ€“if I wouldnโ€™t have missed my other guys. Duke had always been warm and comforting.

Pulling away, I looked up at him through my eyelashes. His prominent jawline made his lips look soft and inviting. His hands rested on my hips, and at that moment, I felt relaxed; I felt happy.

Dukeโ€™s eyes roamed my face before settling on my lips, and I felt a blush creep up my neck. He was very attractive, and his staring at me like he was made me nervous.

Slowly, he began to lean down as though trying to get nearer and close the gap between us, making my brain short-circuit in the process. My heart was hammering in my chest while his lips inched closer to mine, and my hands gripped the front of his shirt to help him.

Duke was going to kiss meโ€“and I wanted him to. I knew that was wrong of me, but I didnโ€™t care.

My eyes fluttered shut when I felt his breath mingle with mine. I sucked in softly, just barely feeling his soft lips brush against mine.

I prepared myself for the full impact of his lips on my own but felt nothing instead.

Duke inhaled deeply before he pulled away, and when I opened my eyes, I saw pain in his. He looked like he was struggling with something. I hoped it was the same thing I was: the urge to kiss him that seemingly came out of nowhere.

He looked away from me quickly. โ€œIโ€™m sorry, I shouldnโ€™t have done that,โ€ he murmured. He didnโ€™t look at me as he gently lifted me off of him and began to walk away.

Part of me wanted to stop him, but I didnโ€™t know what to say. We almost kissed, and it felt natural. Duke was a millimeter away from kissing me!ย Bad Elora!ย I should have known better; I just got caught up in the moment and wasnโ€™t thinking.

Well, Iย wasย thinking… but not about what I should have been. โ€œDuke,โ€ I called out to get him to come back.

“Dinner’s almost readyโ€”we should head out,” he said, giving me one last look before leaving the library, his face still etched with that familiar, troubled expression.

I lingered for a moment, my fingers brushing my lips as I tried to make sense of these new emotions. I already had a crush on Duke, which was complicated enough. But now it seemed like I was developing feelings for all of them. I needed to suppress these emotions before they jeopardized what I had with them.

No matter how strong my feelings were, I wasnโ€™t about to risk losing them over something I was sure would pass soon. Right?

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