Twenty Weeks Pregnant. Baby is the size of a banana.
I
โm frozen, standing on the front step. Iโve been here for enough time that a child riding their bike outside has now passed behind me twice.
It is deceptively nice for Marchโa foolโs spring, if you will. Fellow Canadians will ditch the heavy winter jackets and boots and inevitably fall into a deep, dark depression when the snow returns someday next week. Every year, weโre shocked by such a thingโas if the collective memory develops amnesia. But I like that about us humans. How willfully blind we can be to the gloomy realities ahead.
In reality, we arenโt safe until April. Or maybe even until after my birthday, in May.
Still, at least Iโm notย literallyย frozen on the front stepโdreading meeting Boโs dad.
While I was at work today, Bo picked his dad up from the airport. Heโs staying with us for four days before he goes back to France, enough time to see his son ring in his thirtieth birthday. Bo, on the night we met, called his
father, Robert, his best friend. Heโs also his only living family member. So zero pressure to impress the guy. Nope, none whatsoever.
Heโs going to love you.
Damn, I sure hope so.
When the little girl on her bike passes a third time, eyeing me suspiciously, I decide enough is enough.
โHello?โ I call out, stepping inside the front entryway.
I hear music coming from the dining room and the electric whirl of some sort of machine from the kitchen. A stand mixer, I think. Do we even own one of those? God, I should probably offer to cook some time.
I shrug off my jacket and shoes and follow the sounds of laughter coming from the kitchen.
โHi, just me,โ I say, turning the corner. In the kitchen is the most gorgeous man Iโve ever seenโฆ and his son.
Holy mother ofโNo, actually.ย Holy father of Bo.
โHey!โ Bo says, circling the counter to stand next to me, smiling brightly as always. โWin, this is my dad, Robert. Dad, this is Win.โ Bo pronouncesย Robertย with a French accent, and I nearly swoon. Thereโs not enough oxygen in this room. He should have prepared me. I should have requested family photos.
โIt isย soย good to meet you, Winnifred,โ Robert says in a thick accent, lifting his flour- and dough-covered hands in the air. โIโd shake your hand, but Iโve been kneading bread.โ
โDad went to make himself a sandwich and saw we were out of bread,โ Bo says, bending to speak into my ear. โIย didย offer to go to the store.โ
Robert has all of Boโs similarities in height, natural charm, and build, but his hair and beard are peppered black and grey and trimmed shorter. They
also have different eyes in shape and colourโBoโs wide hazel eyes to Robertโs smaller deep brown. The deep lines and creases around Robertโs lips and eyes speak to a man, like his son, who loves to laugh. Ifย thisย is a sneak preview of what Bo will look like in thirty-ish years, then I better get to work locking that shitย down.
Too bad Bo doesnโt have the accent.
Thoughโฆ I wonder if heโd speak French in bed if I asked nicely.
Oh my god, Win. Focus! Itโs your turn to speak!
โItโs good to meet you too,โ I squeak, swallowing. โBoโs told me so many wonderful things. And please, call me Win or Fred.โ
I donโt miss Boโs crooked smirk when I offer his father the nickname that, until very recently, I was not fond of. I donโt miss, either, the warm affection in Robertโs eyes as they land on my stomach.
Robert picks up the ball of dough, passing it back and forth between his hands, an eyebrow quirked toward his son, the same lopsided smile under his moustache that I know well. โHe also speaks of you very,ย veryย wellโฆโ
Bo clears his throat. โHow was work?โ he asks, walking behind me toward the dining room.
I peek my head around the corner to watch as he pulls his work chair away from his desk and brings it over to me. โOh, uh, fine.โ I say as he gestures for me to sit. My feet wereย killingย me, but this might be a tad over the top. โThe to-go guy came back,โ I say, giving in and sitting.
โThatโs the third time this week!โ Bo says excitedly. Robert looks between us blankly.
โThereโs a man who comes into the cafรฉ and orders everything to go but always stays for hours and works.โ As soon as I say it out loud, I realise how mundane that story really is. When I told Bo about him, he sort of
picked it up and ran with it. We created a whole backstory for the stranger. Bo theorised that heโs secretly in love with one of our other patrons and is waiting for the right time, and I agreed.
Little close to home, actually, now that I think about it.
But regardless, Bo is good at that. Taking something little and making it feel grand and important. Just like heโs done with every step of the pregnancy. Every answer to our nightly questions. Everything is worth celebrating to Bo. Worth getting excited about.
โBut yeah, good day.โ I turn to look at Robert. โHow was your flight?โ
He nods several times, covering a glass bowl with a tea towel. โGood, good, fine. The food on the plane was terrible, but it was a smooth journey.โ
โI see where Bo gets his cooking skills,โ I say, pointing to the bowl. Robert smiles proudly, his face pointed down to his feet. โAh, well.โ โIโm not half as good,โ Bo says, throwing a chocolate chip into his
mouth, cradling the jar from the pantry against his chest.
โI donโt know. Iโm still thinking about that soup you made on day one,โ I reply.
โThe butternut squash?โ he asks, and I nod. โWhy didnโt you say so? Iโd have made it again.โ
โOh, wellโฆ you already cook for me every day. Iโm not going to start making requests.โ
โIโll make it this week,โ he says, throwing another chocolate chip into the air and catching it between his teeth. I clap for him as he curtsies back at me, his hand still gripped around the jar.
Robert laughs under his breath, glancing quickly between us. I realise immediately that Iโve probably interrupted their time together and should make myself scarce.
โIโll give you two some space,โ I say, pushing off the chairโs armrests to stand.
โNo,โ Robert says, halting me, his eyebrows pressed together in obvious offence. โNo, no, no. Sit, please. Please,โ he repeats, opening the fridge. โThis is what Robbie and I do. We talk and cook. You must stay and provide us with some fresh material,โ he says, pulling out the egg carton and milk. โHow does quiche sound?โ
I settle back into the chair. Boโs hand falls to my shoulder, patting gently before he walks toward a cabinet and pulls out a cutting board and places it on the counter next to his dad and ditches his jar of chocolate chips.
โQuiche sounds delicious,โ I say, smiling at both men and crossing my legs under me, settling back against the chair.
The quicheย wasย delicious. I had three servings, and I could have had more if my stomach would allow it. It took about an hour to prepare after Bo convinced his dad to use the crust we had in the freezer instead of making it from scratch. All the while, I got a front-row seat to their familyโs dynamic.
Theyโre surprisingly affectionate for father and son. A lot of hands across shoulders to pass by one another, a few quick pats of Robertโs hand against Boโs cheek to encourage him or tease him in equal measure.
Robert is less timid than Bo is. He has a booming, throaty voice and isnโt afraid to talk with his hands. Or his whole body, for that matter. But heโs still got a gentle presence about him too, like Bo. The way they interact
makes me even more excited to have a kid to throw into their dynamic. It would beย veryย funny to add a third character to their routine.
After dinner, the men choose a record together and begin cleaning up, insisting I rest some more. I fetch a bottle of nail polish from my room and set myself up on the floor in front of the coffee table as Edith Piaf plays from the adjoining room.
Robert joins me soon after, kicked out of the kitchen by his son, balancing a glass of wine as he dances into the room, his body walking in time with the dramatic French singer.
โShe was my wifeโs favourite,โ he says, pointing to the other room. โThatโs how I knew Joanna was the one. Excellent taste. In men too,ย obviously,โ Robert says, his voice echoed by the wineglass heโs speaking into.
I laugh, folding a piece of paper towel to put my hand over top of. โBo told me that you and Joanna fell in love very fast. Ten days, right?โ
โYes. Ten days is all it took to go from strangers to married.โ He takes a long sip, his eyes held on mine and teasing just like his sonโs. โSeems youโre both taking aย slowerย pace.โ
I bite my lip, looking back down at my nail polish on the table, opening
it.
โYes, ignore the old manโs silly comments. Very wise.โ
I smile, shaking my head as I dip the applicator into the mauve polish,
pinching it between my thumb and the side of my palm in my right hand.
โWas this from an accident? Or sickness like Bo?โ he asks, pointing at my right hand.
โOh, no. From birth.โ
โItโs funny. Bo didnโt mention it. Even though he speaks of youย a lot.โ
I raise a brow at him, shaking my head at his blatancy. โIโm sure it wouldโve come up.โ But I sort ofย loveย that it didnโt.
โDieu, jโadore cette chanson!โ Robert exclaims, jumping from his seat. โMonte le son, mon fils!โ
I dropped French after grade ten, but Iโm fairly certain Robert just said he loves the song and asked Bo to turn it up. Or that he loves cats and asked Bo for a slice of pie. One of those two things. Based on the fact that Bo appears from the kitchen and moves to turn the volume up, I think I got it right the first time.
Bo flips a tea towel over his shoulder before leaning against the archway to the kitchen, smirking at Robert performing withย gusto.
Robert dances over to Bo, clasping a hand around his shoulder as the song builds toward the chorus. Then both men sing, or ratherย shout,ย the chorus together. Robert somehow manages to not spill any of his wine as he shakes both arms up in the air above his head, using his whole body as an instrument.
I laugh, bobbing my head along to the music, as they start performing some sort of terrible can-can routine side by side.
โYou must imagine it with all four legs, you see!โ Robert shouts to me over the song. โAnd also the feathers and jewels and whatever else,โ he adds, gesturing to his torso.
Bo kicks him hard with his prosthetic foot, and Robert gapes at his son, wincing as he laughs.
โSeems like it kicks just fine,โ Bo says, shrugging away from him and going back to the kitchen as he smiles to himself.
I twist the lid of my nail polish closed and begin blowing on my nails. Robert lingers next to the record player, tracing one finger along his wifeโs
collection, pulling out a few and inspecting them as he goes.
Once the music ends, Robert and Bo join me in the living room. After a few stories about the jazz band heโs playing with back in Paris and a handful of suggestive comments alluding to the relationship between Bo and meโor lack thereofโRobert excuses himself for bed. Claiming heโs evaded his jetlag long enough.
Which is exactly the moment I spot the extra pillow and blankets laid out on the corner chair and realise Robert has Boโs room for the next few days. Until now, I havenโt thought of our sleeping arrangements for the visit, but thereโs no way Bo should be on the couch. He wonโt fit.
โYouโre not seriously considering sleeping on the couch, right?โ
โDonโt act like you havenโt discovered the magical sleeping powers of this couch.โ
โFor a nap, maybe, but itโs not at all big enough for you to sleep on.
Youโll mess up your back.โ
โI did find myself wishing I could detach both bottom halves of my legs.โ He laughs, bringing his glass of water to his lips.
โSeriously, though, youโll be miserable.โ
โIโll go to the store after our appointment tomorrow and pick up an air mattress.โ
โI can take the couch tonight,โ I offer. โWhat? No way.โ
I roll my eyes at his immediate dismissal. โWhy not?โ
โI donโt know,โ he says, dripping with sarcasm, โmaybe because Iโm not making my pregnantโโ He stops and tenses, then with a quick shake of his head, starts again. It was less than a second for the whole series of movements, but I noticed it all in agonising detail. Whatย wasย he going to
say?ย Myย what? โIโm not going to make a pregnant woman sleep on the couch,โ he says firmly.
Cโmon, Win.ย Three seconds of bravery. An innocent enough offer. You can do this.
โWell, we could share my bedโฆโ I say, forcing my voice to sound indifferent. But then Bo studies me far too intently. His brows knitted together and his head tilted. And I feel myself struggling to not take it back or chase it with some overwrought disclaimer.
โWeย could,โ Bo says, nodding, his eyes still narrowed on me. โAre you sure? You wouldnโt mind?โ
Iย thinkย I can find the kindness in my heart to share a bed with you, sure. โYeah, why not?โ
โTotally sure?โ
โYep,โ I say, clearing my throat.
โAt least until tomorrow, when I go to the store.โ
I shrug one shoulder. โSounds goodโฆ Iโm going to take a shower before bed. Umโฆ feel free to set up your stuff in my room. Iโll sleep tucked against the wallโI like it better that way.โ I have to consciously stop my feet from running to the bathroom Road Runner style once Iโm done speaking.