JOEY
โAND THEN THEREโSย Ronan McGarry. Heโs a little shit, but heโs relatively harmless,โ Lizzie said, reeling off the last on her list of potential troublemakers that Shannon might run into at her new school. โHonestly, though, aside from the odd gossiper or queen bee, itโs pretty mellow at Tommen. Of course, thereโs Bella Wilkinson to contend with.โ
โWhoโs she?โ I asked, standing in the kitchen alongside her, mentally taking notes. โWould I know her?โ
โDoubtful,โ she shot back. โYouโre hot, but you donโt have the pedigree to get on her radar.โ
I cocked a brow. โWow. Thanks.โ
โSorry, but you donโt.โ She offered me a half-hearted shrug. โYouโre a BCS boy from a council estate, and sheโs a money starved, fame-hungry whore,โ she explained, scrunching her nose up in disgust. โYou might be the next big thing for the GAA, but unless you come with all the trimmings โ and when I say trimmings, I mean money, a flashy car, and a future playing professional rugby โ then she wonโt look sideways at you.โ
โIโm distraught.โ
โYeah, you really sound it.โ Lizzie laughed, slapping my arm. โPut it this way; she would get up on a razor blade if said razor blade came in the form of one of the Academy boys. But sheโs in sixth year and really doesnโt bother with anyone from third year, so Shan shouldnโt have any issues with her. Besides, none of the lads in our year are impressive enough to be on her radar. Sheโs more interested in the older lads, the big-time rugby-heads with godlike status.โ
โLike Johnny Kavanagh?โ
โExactly.โ Lizzie nodded. โOr Cormac Ryan. Theyโre both in The Academy.โ
โIโve seen them both play,โ I mused, rubbing my jaw. โThat Kavanagh lad is seriously impressive, but that Ryan kid isnโt going any further than The Academy.โ
โWant to hear a fun inside scoop going around the rugby circle?โ โNot really.โ
โWell, I was forced to hear it, so you can, too.โ โPlease donโt.โ
โApparently, Bellaโs been sleeping with Cormac since before Christmas, even though sheโs meant to be with Johnny Kavanagh, but heโs out on injury.โ
โOh, the scandal,โ I replied flatly. โWhat life changing information I have been given about three people I couldnโt give one single fuck about. How will I ever contain my excitement?โ
โYouโre sarcastic and blunt to the point of being cruel.โ She threw her head back and laughed. โI love it.โ
โWell, it didnโt take you long to jump back into old habits,โ a familiar voice sneered, and I turned my head to see Casey Lordan glaring up at me. โHaving fun with your new sidepiece, asshole?โ
I narrowed my eyes. โWhat are you talking about?โ
โYou,โ Casey hissed, pointing a finger between us. โAnd this little slut.โ โDid you seriously just call me a slut?โ Lizzie interjected. โAre you
insane?โ
โIf the dick fits, sweetie,โ Casey sneered, giving Shannonโs little pal one of those withering looks, and sloshing wine over the rim of her glass in the process. โAnd it sure looks like it does.โ
โDonโt call meย sweetie, bitch,โ Lizzie warned, hopping down from the island. โBecause you donโt know who the hell youโre dealing with.โ
โPack it in,โ I warned, quickly stepping between my sisterโs best friend and my girlfriendโs one. โWhatever you think you know, you donโt,โ I said, addressing Casey. โSheโs my baby sisterโs friend.โ
โYeah,ย sureย she is.โ
โYeah, I am,โ Lizzie argued from behind me.
โYou,โ I ordered, turning back to face Lizzie. โWalk away.โ โButโฆโ
โWalkย away,โ I barked, waiting for Lizzie to storm off, before turning my attention back to Casey. โAs for you,โ I snapped, tone laced with disgust. โI donโt know whatโs after coming over you, Case, but you need to get your head out of the gutter.โ
โI saw you all over her!โ
โSheโs aย child,โ I bit out. โHave a bit of cop on, will ya? Jesus! And keep your goddamn nose out of my business while youโre at it.โ
Doing the complete opposite, she reached a hand up and slapped me across the cheek, and fuck if it didnโt sting.
โOr what, huh?โ She pushed at my chest with a surprising amount of force considering she barely reached my chest in height. โWhat are you going to do if I donโt, asshole?โ
โCasey,โ I warned, backing up a few steps, only to have her close the space between us. โBack off.โ
โWhyโd you do it, Joey?โ she demanded, pushing and shoving at my chest until she had me cornered with nowhere to go. โYou could have left her alone,โ she slurred, wobbling in her heels, and I, for some unknown reason, reached a hand out to steady her.
Thatโs right; I was the eejit who stopped the girl who was attacking me from falling over.
As a thank you, she slapped me again.
Lovely.
โListen here, you good-looking son of a bitch,โ she slurred as she poked me in the chest with her finger. โI donโt care how slick you can move your hips on a pitch โ or on a mattress, for that matter โ we both know that you are punchingย wayย above your weight with my girl.โ
โWhat the hell are you talking about?โ I demanded, feeling my temper rise. โYou sound like a head-case.โ
โIโm talking about you breaking my best friendโs heart,โ she hissed, poking me again. โAoife is worth ten of every other girl at this party, and
youโre a stupid asshole if you canโt see that.โ
โYou think Iโm fucking around?โ I gaped at her. โAre you insane?โ โOh, Iย knowย you are. I just caught you red-handed.โ
โTalking,โ I spat back. โYou caught me red-handedย talkingย to my sisterโs childhood friend.โ
โDeny it all you want. I know what I saw.โ โYouโre deluded.โ
โAnd youโre a dickhead,โ she continued her rant. โAoife wasย fineย with Paul. She wasย okay. Her life was stable. It was consistent. He wasย goodย for her. But you just couldnโt leave her alone, could you? No, you just had to keep chipping away at her heart, until she threw it all away for you. And look where it got her.โ
โNow, you listen to me,โ I seethed. โIf you so much as think about trying to sink your toxic claws in Aoife, and twisting this into something itโs not, then I swear to Christ, Case, I will lose my mind.โ
โYou lost your mind the minute you decided to break my best friendโs heart,โ she snapped. โAoife Molloy is the singleย bestย thing thatโs ever happened to you, Joey Lynch, and everyone knows it. Sheย lovesย you, asshole, despite your reputation and all of the horrible things youโve done in your past, and instead of treating her with the love and respect she deserves, you trample all over her with your bullshit.โ
โYou donโt know a damn thing about it,โ I snarled, furious. โYou have no clue of whatโs happening between us, so donโt start harping on to me about shit that doesnโt concern you.โ
โI know that you fed her some asshole line about needing space, and then sauntered off without a backwards glance,โ she replied, sounding just as furious.
โCasey, stop it!โ Molloyโs achingly familiar voice echoed through my head, causing every hair on my body to stand on end.
โStop it right now,โ she ordered, dragging her friend away from me. โDonโt do this.โ
โHe deserves it.โ
โYou donโt know anything about it, now stop.โ โI know he hurt you.โ
โCasey! I mean it. Letโs go.โ
Struck fucking dumb at the sight of Molloy in a skin-tight, backless, red dress, I could do nothing but watch as she completely ignored me, focusing on her friend instead.
โBut he hurt you,โ Casey continued to slur, pointing her finger in my direction. โYouโre so sad, and eating all that chocolate, and itโs all his fault.โ
โIt doesnโt matter,โ Molloy bit out, wrapping an arm around Caseyโs waist and pulling her towards the door, never once looking at me the entire time. โCome on,โ she continued to say, coaxing her bitchy gal pal away. โIโll get us a spin home.โ
โMolloy?โ
โNot right now, Joe.โ
My heart bucked wildly in protest. โMolloy.โ
โNo,โ she choked out, before hurrying out of the kitchen with Casey draped around her. โI canโt do this right now, okay?โ
No, it wasnโt okay.
It wasnโt fucking okay at all.
My legs were moving after her before my brain had a chance to catch up. โPatrick Feely is outside with the car,โ her neighbor told her, as she
looped an arm around Casey and helped Molloy cart her outside to a nearby running car. โHeโll make sure that you guys get home safely. Heโs one of the good guys, Aoif. You can trust him.โ
โThanks, Katie,โ I heard Molloy reply, as she opened the back door and maneuvered Casey inside. โSorry about this.โ
โItโs totally fine, girlie,โ Katie replied, giving her a side hug. โYou didnโt do anything wrong.โ
โI donโt want to go home,โ Casey slurred, slumping into the back seat. โIโm having fun.โ
โYeah,โ Molloy growled. โRuining my life.โ
โDonโt be mad at me,โ her friend whined. โIโm trying to mind you.โ โI can mind myself, Case.โ
โBut he made you so sad.โ
โJust scoot over and let me in. We can talk about this later.โ
โMolloy,โ I interjected, grabbing ahold of the door when she moved to climb in beside her friend. โDonโt leave yet.โ
โI have to.โ โWhy?โ
โIโm playing by your rules here, Joe,โ she croaked out, still averting her gaze from me. โYou do your thing and I do mine, remember?โ
โYeah,โ Casey slurred from her perch on the backseat. โLeave her alone, asshole.โ
โCasey, itโs grand, stop,โ Molloy muttered, cheeks flushed. โJust leave it, okay?โ
โDonโt leave,โ I repeated, ignoring the evil eyes her friend was giving me. โDonโt go, Aoife.โ
โI have to,โ she replied quietly. โSheโs drunk and I need to make sure she gets home.โ
โIโll take her home, Aoif,โ Katie offered up, and I instantly knew which one of her friends was my favorite. โIf you want to stay and, uh, talk things out or whatever, then Iโd be happy to go with Patrick and drop her home.โ
โThanks, Katie, but thatโs putting you out.โ
โI donโt mind,โ Katie was quick to counter. โI think you should stay and talk to him.โ She offered me a smile โ albeit a warning one. โNicely.โ
โHey.โ I held my hands up, letting her know that I was fully prepared to comply with her wishes.
โNoโฆโ Casey whined. โDonโt do it, Aoif, heโll only feed you more bullshit.โ
โShush, you!โ Katie snapped, quickly climbing into the backseat alongside Casey before swiftly closing the car door.
Moments later, the car pulled away from the path, leaving us standing in a thick, strained silence.
โSo, you were just going to leave without speaking to me?โ
โI donโt want to argue with you, Joe,โ she whispered, arms moving to wrap around her waist protectively. โIโm too tired.โ
โI donโt want that, either.โ
She nodded stiffly and continued to stare down at her stiletto clad feet. โAre you going to look at me?โ
โNot right now.โ
โWhy not?โ
โBecause it hurts too much.โ
My heart constricted in my chest. โBaby.โ
She swiftly changed the subject by asking, โSo, what are you doing at a Tommen party, Joey Lynch?โ
โBelieve it or not, I was invited.โ โBy who?โ
โHugh Biggs,โ I replied before quickly turning the tables. โWhat areย you
doing at a Tommen party, Aoife Molloy?โ โI was invited.โ
โBy who?โ
โKatie Wilmot.โ
I thought about it for a moment before awareness dawned on me. โWait, your next-door neighbor, Katie, is with Hugh Biggs?โ
โYeah,โ she mumbled. โYou already knew that.โ
I had a vague recollection of Molloy telling me about her friend having a boyfriend on the rugby team at Tommen, but Iโd been too strung out to pay
much heed to the conversation at the time. โNo, no, no, you told me her name was Katie Horgan.โ That, Iย didย remember.
โSheโs Katie Horgan-Wilmot,โ Molloy replied. โHer parents arenโt married, remember? Her mamโs Horgan and her dadโs Wilmot. She has a double-barreled last name, but she mostly goes by her dadโs name.โ
โSo,ย Katieย is with Hugh.โ
โYeah, theyโve been together for a while now.โ
โWell shit.โ My thoughts reverted back to the conversation I had with Lizzie, and a pang of sympathy hit me in the chest, before I abruptly stripped all memory of that conversation from my mind.
Not my monkeys, not my circus.
โWhyโs she at Tommen again?โ I asked, searching my mind and coming up empty. โSheโs from Rosewood. Her folks arenโt exactly flush with cash.โ Without trying to sound like too much of a dick, I asked, โShouldnโt she be at BCS with us?โ
โYou know why sheโs at Tommen, Joe,โ she muttered, kicking at a stone with her foot. โIโve told you all about it before, remember?โ
Yeah, but I was on another planet and couldnโt hear you.
โOh, yeah,โ I lied, disgusted by just how many ways Iโd let this girl down. โI remember.โ
โHave you been drinking?โ
โIโve had one drink the whole night.โ
โWow,โ she said softly. โThat must be a personal best for you.โ
Ouch.ย โI deserve that.โ
โI didnโt say that to hurt you,โ she squeezed out, shaking her head. โI wouldnโt blame you if you had.โ
โYeah.โ
Another strained silence settled between us, and it made me feel uneasy.
โYou do know that Casey was completely off the mark earlier, right? That girl I was talking to back there is a friend of Shannonโs,โ I heard myself hurry to explain, heart gunning in my chest. โYou get that, right?โ
โYeah.โ Her voice was barely more than a whisper when she said, โKatie mentioned something about that.โ
โSo, youโre okay then?โ I pushed gently. โYou know that there was nothing going on.โ
โNo, Iโm notย okay,โ she choked out, voice thick with emotion now. โI havenโt beenย okayย in weeks.โ This time she did look at me, and it cut like a knife when I saw the tears pooling in her eyes. โBut you seem like youโre doing a lot better, so clearly this break up is working for one of us.โ
โAre you serious?โ I took a step back, feeling like she had just knifed me in the gut. โYou think Iโm not hurting?โ
โI donโt know how you feel anymore.โ โIn love,โ I bit out. โWith you.โ โDonโtโฆโ
โNothingโs changed for me, Molloy,โ I interrupted, needing her to know. โNothing.โ
โI canโt do this,โ she admitted, voice torn. โI canโt.โ
โCanโt do what?โ I asked, feeling panicked. โCanโt talk to me?โ
โBe here with you and not beย withย you,โ she strangled out, pressing a hand to her forehead. โItโs too much. Itโs too hard.โ Shaking her head, she turned to walk away. โI canโt.โ
โAoife.โ A fucked-up combination of guilt and fear coursed through me as I watched her leave. โAll Iโm trying to do is protect you.โ
“No โ” Swinging around, she stalked back to me, looking mad as hell. “No,” she repeated through clenched teeth, pointing her finger at me. “This is not protecting me, Joey. Walking away isย notย protecting me. Leaving me isย notย protecting me, dammit!โ Furious, she blinked back her tears and glared up at me. “That isย notย how you treat the person you love, which goes to show that you never loved me the way I loved you.โ
โNever loved you?โ I gaped at her. โAre you fuckingย crazy? Youโre the only person on this planet Iย doย love!โ
“No,” she snapped, shaking her head. “You donโt get to do that. You don’t get to come back and wreck me.” Placing her hands on my chest, she pushed me back when I reached for her. โYou donโt get to tell me you love me and then go right back to breaking my heart!โ She choked out another pained sob when I cupped her cheek. โYou donโt love me, Joey.โ Eyelids fluttering, she leaned into my touch and sniffled. “You don’t know how to love anyone.”
“Maybe I do it badly,” I strangled out, as my heart splintered apart. “But I do love you.โ
โYouโre a shithead.โ โI know.โ
โI canโt live like this.โ โI know.โ
โNo, I mean it, Joey,โ she breathed, jerking away from me with a shiver. โI canโt take another second of it.โ With that, she turned on her skyscraper heels and marched back inside the house, tossing the words, โIt hurts too much,โ over her shoulder as she went.
I knew that I should turn in the opposite direction and walk my ass away from her, but that wasnโt what I did.
No, because like the sick, masochistic fuck-up I was, I followed her back into the Biggsโ house, knowing that Molloy wasnโt one to take being scorned lying down.
There wasnโt a doubt in my mind that she had every intention of making me pay for not giving her what she wanted, which, just so happened to be exactly the same thing as I wanted.
Fuck my life.