โCONGRATULATIONS,โย I say into Pippaโs hair as we hug at her engagement party the next evening. โI love you and Iโm so happy for you two, but if he breaks your heart, Iโll photoshop pictures of him in diapers with a dominatrix and release them on the internet.โ
We pull back and she grins. The intimate restaurant I booked for the event is filled with our family, Vancouver Storm players and their partners, and a few friends from the tour Pippa opened for this summer as a singer- songwriter while she promoted her new album.
โIโm just kidding,โ I tell her, tugging on a lock of her long, wavy, honey-blond hair.
She laughs. โI know.โ
Under the soft, dim lighting in the restaurant, sheโs glowing. Maybe thatโs what happens to people when they fall head over heels like my sister did. Jamie needed an assistant when he moved to Vancouver; little did he know it would be his high school crush who heโd end up engaged to.
Behind her, Jamie looks on with a small smile, leaning down to give me a big hug.
โIโm not kidding,โ I whisper, and he snorts.
โThanks for organizing this.โ His eyes go to Pippa, whoโs deep in conversation with our parents and Jamieโs mom. โIt means a lot to us.โ
Emotion rises up my throat. โYouโre welcome. I really am thrilled for you two.โ I give him a tentative smile. โI know sheโs everything to you and youโll take care of her, and Iโm happy youโre going to be my brother-in- law.โ
He arches an eyebrow, but thereโs a teasing spark in his eyes. โEven if Iโm a hockey player?โ
I huff a laugh. At the beginning of their relationship, I made my thoughts on hockey playersโthat theyโre treated like gods and feel entitled to whatever and whoever they wantโvery clear to Pippa. โYouโre the exception. I wouldnโt let just anyone marry my little sister.โ
That warm, liquid emotion moves up my throat again, stinging my eyes as he gives my shoulder a squeeze.
โLetโs get some photos before dinner,โ my mom says, gesturing at Pippa and Jamie.
โOne second.โ Pippa grabs my hand and starts pulling me away. โI need Hazel to help me with theโฆ something.โ
โWhat something?โ I ask as she hauls me through the restaurant. โIโll take care of it so you can have funโโ
In the quiet foyer area at the front of the restaurant, away from the guests in the main dining area, she whirls on me. โYouโve been avoiding me.โ
โUh.โ I scramble for an excuse for not answering her three texts about the teamโs new trade.
โConnor is on theย teamย now, Hazel.โ
For the tenth time in the last twenty-four hours, my stomach drops through the floor. โI know.โ
Itโs all Iโve fucking thought about. My lying, cheating, manipulative, narcissistic ex is now on the hockey team I work for, and Iโm assigned to be his physiotherapist.
All night, I tossed and turned.
โWhat are we doing about it?โ she asks.
I canโt quit, because working for the team is an incredible experience, and I actually love my job. The senior physios are knowledgeable and kind, and itโs surprisingly rewarding, working with the players. While Iโm saving to open my own inclusive fitness studio one day, working for the Storm is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Iโd be stupid to walk away.
โNothing,โ I tell her, putting on a neutral smile like I donโt care. โWeโre doing nothing.โ
โHe cheated on you.โ
My stomach clenches, and I think about that party back in university when everyone watched, whispering. What he said to me and how itโs stuck
with me for years.
โIโm well aware.โ I keep my voice low and my expression pleasant in case anyone looks over. โEveryone saw that Iโm his physio, including him. If we change it now, everyone will knowโโ
My words hang in the air as I cut myself off. The deeper we get into this, the more erratic my heart beats. Even Pippa doesnโt know the full truth.
I donโt want him to know he got to me and that Iโm still upset about what happened. I donโt even like Pippa knowing, even though sheโs my sister and best friend.
Iโm the one who takes care of her, not the other way around.
โI spent two years in high school working ahead so thatโโ Iโm about to dig deep into my insult arsenal, but Iโm supposed to be convincing Pippa Iโm fine. โSo we could go to university together.โ Connorโs a year older than me. I studied my ass off so that we didnโt have to be apart. I took summer classes to get ahead.
Her eyes soften, and I hate it. I hate that she feels bad for me.
โIโm not going to run.โ I straighten up, push my shoulders back, and fake all the tough, strong energy I need right now. โI was here first, and Iโm not going anywhere.โ
Pippa opens her mouth to say something, but I cut her off.
โThis is your engagement party. Please,ย pleaseย donโt make it about me, or Iโll plan another one.โ I tap my finger on my lip, narrowing my eyes. โIโm picturing images of you on tour plastered all over the walls. Jamie would love it.โ
She snorts. โYouโre a menace.โ Her expression turns reluctant as she studies my face. โAre you sure youโre okay?โ
โOne hundred percent fine.โ I put on a bright smile. From the way she winces, I went too hard, but I give her a gentle push into the restaurant. โGo. Socialize. Flash your big engagement ring around.โ
She sticks her tongue out at me, and I stick mine out in return before she heads back into the restaurant. Jamie holds his hand out as she approaches, and for a moment, I watch them. His hand resting on her waist, keeping her close. Her soft, affectionate smile as she gazes up at him.
Whatโs it like, I wonder, to be everything to someone? To trust someone like that?
Thereโs a sharp clench around my heart. Girls like Pippa get love like that. Girls like me? We do casual. I sleep with guys once and only once. Itโs safer that way. No one gets their hopes up and no one gets hurt.
I walk back into the restaurant but bump right into a broad, hard chest. โSorryโโ
Rory Miller tilts his arrogant, amused grin down at me. All the air gets sucked out of the room, and my stomach does that annoying flip-flop fluttery thing.
โThere you are, Hartley.โ
This reaction? Itโs not my fault. Itโs his goddamned charisma. I blink up at his crushing deep blue eyes the color of a moody ocean. Heโs almost a foot taller than me, with dark blond hair thatโs a little too long. Hockey hair, the guys call it. With his lazy overconfidence, he pulls it off.
Not that Iโd ever admit that.
Itโs his grin that riles me, though. A perpetually amused, flirtatious slant to his lips. Itโs exactly the way a hockey superstar would smile, like he knows he can have anything.
I hate Rory Millerโs stupid fucking arrogant grin. I hate it so much that I think about it all the time.
He steps back, rakes his gaze down my outfitโa dark red midi dress with a sweetheart neckline and a soft, curve-hugging skirt that makes my ass look incredibleโand lets out a low whistle.
โYou look very pretty tonight,โ he says.
He gives me that flirty grin again, and nerves flutter through me. Iโm calm, cool, and totally disinterested in Rory Miller, and if I tell myself that enough times, it might actually become true.
Heat flushes up my neck and cheeks, and I clear my throat. โThank you. Excuse me.โ I move to get around him, but he steps into my path, blocking it.
โAdmit it. You wore this dress for me.โ
โWow, Miller.โ My laugh is light. โIt sure is crowded in here with that enormous ego of yours.โ
He gives me a scolding, teasing expression. โNow, Hartley, play along and tell me I look good, too.โ
My eyes flick over him in his suit. Tailored perfectly to his tall, broad frame, it screamsย custom-madeย andย expensive, but itโs the rich navy fabric I struggle to look away from. Itโs the exact shade of his eyes.
โYou donโt need the ego boost.โ I should walk away, but instead, I smack my head in mock-disappointment. โOh my god. I forgot to reserve a seat for your sex doll.โ
His grin broadens, and sparks dance in my stomach. He doesnโt actually have a sex dollโI donโt thinkโbut this is one of my favorite bits.
โI gave her the night off,โ he says in a low voice, leaning in with a rakish grin and glittering eyes. โSheโs earned it.โ
A revolted laugh threatens to slip out, but I hold it down. I will not laugh at Rory Millerโs jokes. Heโs basically a child, and itโll just encourage him.
โRory.โ Donna, Jamieโs mom, appears with the photographer I hired. โYouโre here.โ She gestures at the two of us. โLetโs get a photo.โ
Before I can protest that weโre not together, he slips his hand around my waist, pulling me against him. His scent surrounds meโwarm, spicy, and woodsy, like sandalwood and cloves. From either the intensely masculine way he smells or the way his body heat warms me, my stomach dips.
โRelax,โ he murmurs into my ear, giving my waist a squeeze. โYouโre so tense.โ
The photographer lines up the focus and I count the seconds until dinner, where Iโve placed Rory on the opposite end of the table from me.
โLetโs go out,โ he says quietly as the camera clicks.
I snort, even as delight shoots through me. โYouโre joking. Your sex doll will be so jealous.โ
His quiet laugh tickles my cheek. โNah, Iโll bring her.โ
I really do laugh this time, and the flash goes off. Stars burst in my vision.
โLovely,โ the photographer says, snapping away. โWhat a beautiful couple.โ
I open and close my mouth like a fish. The camera clicks again and I step away from him, putting distance between us.
His hands slip into his pockets as he regards me, gaze dipping down to my neckline, so fast I barely catch it. โCome on, Hartley.โ
โI donโt date hockey players, and Iโm pretty sure you donโt even know my first name.โ
His gaze sharpens, his smile turning flirty. โYou want me to say your name more,ย Hazel?โ
A shiver of something weird rolls down my back. The last thing I need is him pulling outย thatย low, seductive voice again. โNo.โ
โThen letโs be friends.โ
The tilt of his mouth and the way his eyes drag over me make me shake my head. He doesnโt want to be friends. He loves the chase. A person doesnโt get to where he is in his hockey career without being insanely competitive, and me turning him down is like catnip.
With guys like Rory and Connor, itโs only a matter of time before they get bored and move on to the next thrill.
โIn high school, Miller, you blackmailed me into tutoring you. You used your hot, talented hockey player status to get what you wanted.โ He spoke to the hockey coach, who spoke to the principal, who spoke to the teachers. โFor all of grades eleven and twelve, you used up two of my afternoons per week.โ I stare him down, ignoring the lock of hair thatโs fallen into his eyes. โFriends donโt do that.โ
It isnโt the whole truth about why I want nothing to do with him, but itโs as much as Iโll ever admit out loud, especially to him.
Thereโs a pause before his eyebrow arches. โYou think Iโm hot?โ My face burns. โThatโs what you got from that?โ
He shrugs, baffled. โI made sure you got extra credit out of the tutoring thing.โ
I scramble for something to say, momentarily tripped up, because I didnโt actually know that was his doing. I just thought they were trying to sweeten the deal for me.
I glance around, searching for Pippa, Jamie, Hayden, Alexei, anyone.
People are taking their seats for dinner. โIโm going to sit down now.โ
His hand comes to my arm to stop me. โHold on.โ The cocky smirk falls away, leaving something serious and sincere in his eyes. โDid you see the email Ward sent out last night?โ
โYes. Youโre captain now. Congratulations.โ
He frowns, shaking his head. โAbout McKinnon,โ he says, watching me intently.
โOh my fuckingย god,โ I sigh in exasperation. โDo I have a sign on my back that saysย Ask me about my shitty ex-boyfriend!ย or something? Iโm fine. Itโs fine.โ I clap my hands together. โEverything is fine.โ
He crosses his arms over his broad chest. โYou said โfineโ too many times there.โ
I huff a laugh.
He searches my eyes, and my heart jumps into my throat at the concern on his face. Heโs so close to seeing the truthโthat Iโm not fine, that Iโm freaking the fuck out.
โDo you still have a thing for him?โ
I make a choking noise of disbelief, and people glance over. โAbsolutely not. I donโt want this.โ
Shame churns in my stomach. Is that what people think? That Iโve been carrying a torch for Connor for years?
โIโll speak to Ward,โ he says quietly, so gentle and careful, nothing like his normal arrogant self. โMcKinnon can work with one of the other physios. Iโll take care of it for you.โ
If I didnโt know him better, Iโd read the worry in his eyes as protectiveness. My pulse blips at the thought of Rory Miller hovering over me like Jamie hovers over Pippa, but I catch myself.
He wants what he canโt have. Itโs just another move in a game I donโt want to play.
โI donโt need your help,โ I tell him. โI donโt need a bodyguard, and I donโt want you interfering with my job.โ
He makes a frustrated noise and runs his hand through his hair. The determination in his eyes makes me feel like heโs going to fight me on this, but his Adamโs apple bobs and he dips his chin in a nod.
โOkay,โ he says simply. โI wonโt interfere.โ โThank you.โ
For the rest of the night, Iโm busy with Pippa, Jamie, and our family, but every time I glance down at the other end of the table, Roryโs watching me, still wearing that protective, concerned frown.