Her head bobs dangerously close to the sharp needle slipping from between her 1ngers.
She startles, swallowing her gasp as she blinks awake. Tired eyes meet mine from where Iโm leaning over my work table, sketching a new knife design.
I turn back to my work, unsurprised by anything she does at this point. โYouโre going to stab yourself again.โ
โIโve worked through the night before,โ she says defensively, though actively 1ghting a yawn. โIโll be 1ne.โ
โThis time itโll be your eye.โ I sigh. โMaybe your throat. De1nitely a couple 1ngers.โ
โIโm not going to stab anything, Mak.โ She breathes my name and Iโm surprised by the aIect it has on me from a person so pretty.
I straighten, striding towards her. โNo, you will not.โ She sputters when I pluck the needle from her 1ngers. โBecause I am taking this for the night.โ
โNo, thereโs so much left to do,โ she argues, gesturing to the assortment of pinned fabric. โIโve barely begun the stitching, and donโt even get me started on how long the paneling will take on theโโ
โYouโve been working for two full days now.โ I cross my arms over my chest. โAnd Iโve heard enough words for today. I canโt imagine how exhausted you must be after speaking them all.โ
Her dull look could rival one of the many in my arsenal. โIs this you kicking me out for the night?โ
I Rash her a mocking smile. โDonโt let the door hit you on the way out.โ โFine.โ She stands, staring up at me sternly. Itโs comically endearing.
โHopefully some sleep will make you less grumpy for me tomorrow.โ โDid that work for me last night?โ
โClearly not, but I wonโt lose hope. Yet.โ
โWhatever helps you sleep better tonight,โ I say pleasantly.
She brushes past me, walking swiftly towards the door. Then, without warning, she spins on her heel. โIโll be here, bright and early.โ
โOh, you certainly were this morning,โ I mutter. She turns back to the door.
I sigh when her head whips back around.
โAnd I expect to be greeted with a smile and a sticky bun.โ She nods curtly, as though 1nalizing this demand.
I cross my arms. โI thought we were done with the demands, hun?โ โGet me my sticky bun, and we will be.โ
With that, sheโs sealed from view when the wooden door swings shut behind her with a squeal.
Itโs only then that I take my 1rst deep breath since meeting her.
She is an intoxicating sort of exhausting, like running until youโve lost your breath but enjoying the feeling all the while. And I feel as though Iโve been sprinting for days.
Even worse, I fear that I am, in fact, beginning to enjoy her.
What a terrifying realization, to admit oneโs admiration for another.
I run my hands through the strands of hair falling around my face, sighing as I make my way over to the disheveled bed I so desperately want to fall face-1rst into. Instead, I sit on the edge of it, lost in thoughts Iโd rather not entertain. Thoughts of a girl Iโve only just met, of all things. How very pathetically poetic.
Shaking myself from a stupor of inevitable self-destruction, I stand to begin my nightly routine. This consists of 1rst peeling the coal-stained clothes from my body. Once that task is complete, I slip oI the partially leathered pants still hugging my legs. And after rummaging through one of the many crooked cabinets in my boxers alone, I manage to 1nd a thin pair of pants to pull on.
This all happens in a timely manner, as routines typically do. Because next, Iโm wetting a cloth to wipe the soot from my skin. In all honesty โ a relatively foreign concept โ I tend to keel over on my work table at this hour, dead asleep. But tonight, the interruption in my routine has ensured that my mind is plenty awake to actually 1nish it for once.
Soot clings to the damp cloth I drag across my skin, each swipe revealing the scars beneath.
That is when the pounding at my door begins. And, Plagues, it doesnโt stop until I swing it open.
Itโs her I see standing before me. Though, perhaps a version I never thought Iโd witness. Her face is splotchy, striped with tears that leak from the hazel eyes above. Every inch of her is shaking, quaking beneath the fear smothering her frail form.
Panic clogs her throat, leaving only actions to speak on her behalf. She falls into me, wrapping thin arms round my bare waist before pressing a tear-stained face into my skin.
I hesitate, feeling unsurety stiIen my body. It seems to pass at the acknowledgment of it, as though only remaining long enough for me to recognize these newfound emotions sheโs instilled in me. Because uncertainty implies that I care enough to question how I should act.
With that horrifying realization, my arms fold round her, pulling her tightly against my chest. She sni es against me, splattering my skin with an assortment of liquids Iโd rather not consider at the moment.
โI-Iโm sorry,โ she whispers, choking on the words. โI had nowhere else to go.โ
My hand tilts her face up towards mine, allowing me full view of her distraught complexion. โWhat happened? Whatโs going on?โ
Another sniI. โI was on my way to the F-Fort, and there was this group of men in the alley.โ My blood begins to boil before sheโs even 1nished her sentence. โThey started sayingโฆ things. And then they were f-following me and
โโ Her eyes well with angry tears. โI started running. I-I didnโt know what to do
โโ
โShh.โ I run a hand down the length of her curls, feeling a hiccup jostle her body. โYou did the right thing. Run to me. Always run to me.โ
Except that I wonโt be here much longer. If everything goes according to plan.
I say none of that, of course, in an eIort to conceal my cowardliness. She blinks up at me, tears clinging to her thick lashes. โDid I wake you? Iโm sorry, I should haveโโ
โKicked their asses?โ I 1nish with a sigh. โYes, but you donโt know how to do that, do you?โ
She shakes her head, sni ing with the movement. โPae was always there to kickโฆ asses for me.โ
She hesitates at the profanity, as though considering if this situation warrants it. Her internal dilemma almost makes me smile.
โYes, well, sheโs not here anymore,โ I say slowly. โSo, maybe itโs time for you to learn for yourself.โ
She steps out of my hold, a look of uncertainty on her face. โYou see, Iโm really more of a lover than a 1ghter.โ
โYes, Iโve gathered that.โ My words are much softer than anticipated, as though sheโs somehow coaxed the compassion out of me. She turns away, hiding her face in the shadow Iโm casting over her. โLook at me.โ Again, each word is soft enough to comfort, but stern enough to steal her attention. Her head tilts back towards me. โAre you all right?โ
She nods vigorously. โI am now.โ
โGood.โ I step aside, oIering the room to her. โBecause it looks like youโll be sleeping here until further notice.โ
โOh, no, I couldnโtโโ โYou can. And you will.โ โNo, really, itโsโโ
โExtremely generous, Iโm aware,โ I 1nish for her.
Wiping a stray tear from her cheek, she straightens with determination. โFine.
Only if you promise to spend a night in the Fort.โ I nod curtly. โSure.โ
โShake on it,โ she insists, shoving her uninjured hand at me. โYou really think that is what will make me keep my promise?โ
She wiggles her 1ngers despite my words, and I shake her soft hand if only so we can move on from this conversation.
โOkay. Itโs settled, then.โ She sniIs again before thoroughly clearing her face of any fallen tears. Then her gaze lands expectantly on me.
โRight,โ I say, less than enthusiastically. โTake the bed.โ
She looks bashfully at the crumpled sheets. โOh, Iโm used to sleeping on the ground anyway, so Iโll justโโ
โAccept my continued generosity?โ She opens her mouth, but itโs my voice that 1lls the room. โGreat. Take the bed.โ
Her hands are suddenly planted 1rmly on her hips. โCould I get a please with that demand?โ
โAw, look whoโs 1nally standing up for themselves.โ I tap my 1nger against her nose. โBut no.โ
Hu ng bangs out of her eyes, she walks hesitantly towards the bed. After a long moment of contemplation, she sits sti y on the edge of it.
Standing over her, I begin pulling at one of the wrinkled blankets sheโs currently sitting on. She all but tips over, sputtering. In response to her objection, I spread the soft fabric on the Roor beside the bed. โSurely you can sacri1ce a single blanket for me.โ
โSurely you could have asked me to stand up,โ she mumbles with a forced smile.
โSurely you know there is no fun in that.โ
Her gaze prickles my skin as I crumple clothing into a makeshift pillow. I struggle to ignore the feel of it, the look on her face. Even in the midst of crying, she managed to glow, as though each tear was a drop of sunlight.
โYou missed a spot.โ
My head lifts at the sound of her voice. I raise my eyebrows in question. โThe coal dust,โ she clari1es. โThereโs still some on your elbow.โ
โDo stay away, then.โ I frown. โIโd rather not be sneezed on again.โ
She smiles, snatching the damp cloth from the counter sitting opposite the bed. โOh, donโt be ridiculous.โ Grabbing my arm, she attempts to tug me towards her. And, begrudgingly, I allow it.
She hesitates slightly before swiping the cloth across my arm. The fabric is rough against my skin, though her touch is unsurprisingly gentle. โIโm far from fragile.โ I say this in response to each of her tender touches.
โI know,โ she says softly. โThere is quite the diIerence between fragility and delicacy.โ
These words are nothing like the hundreds of bubbly ones prior. These words are deliberate, insightful in a way that only she is. โSo, you think Iโm delicate?โ
She tilts her head in question. โDonโt you want to be handled with care?โ This leaves me speechless.
Itโs only when she sets the stained cloth down that I clear my throat, making my 1rst sound in a multitude of moments. I watch her sink back onto the mattress, burrowing into the blankets beneath her.
That is when I begin striding towards the door, shoving daggers into the band of my pants.
I can hear the concern in her voice. โWhere are you going?โ The door swings open. โTo 1nd them.โ