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Chapter no 11

Saving 6 (Boys of Tommen, 3)

Part 3 โ€“ THIRD YEAR

SEPTEMBER 1ST 2001

AOIFE

โ€œWHEREโ€™Dย you want me to toss the old one?โ€

Jerking awake at the sound of the familiar voice, I sprang up in my bed and craned my neck to hear better.

โ€œThrow it out in the yard.โ€ That was my dadโ€™s voice. โ€œIโ€™ll load it into the van later and take it to the dump.โ€

โ€œYou sure?โ€ My eyes widened in horror. โ€œItโ€™s a cast iron tub. Could be worth something if ya take it to Timmy Murphy over in Glenmore? He wheels and deals in scrap.โ€

โ€œHe has a young one in the same year as yourself and the twins, doesnโ€™t he?โ€

โ€œNeasa. Yeah, sheโ€™s in my class. Listen, I could give him a buzz, if you want? He might throw ya a score for it.โ€

โ€œNah, the thing is on its last legs. Itโ€™s red rotten underneath. It wouldnโ€™t make the price of the diesel it would cost me to drive it over there.โ€

Oh my god.

โ€œFair enough.โ€

He did not!

โ€œGood man, Joey, can you carry that downstairs on your own?โ€

He did!

โ€œYeah, Tony, itโ€™s not a bother. Iโ€™ll have to head off around three today, though. Iโ€™ve a match at the pavilion.โ€

Dad brought him home.

โ€œJesus, son, youโ€™re as strong as an ox. And thatโ€™s not a bother. Weโ€™ll have it finished by then.โ€

Again!

And I looked like something that had been dragged through a ditch.

Perfect.

The prospect of seeing Joey, after spending a whole summer of not seeing his face every weekday morning in class, had me throwing the covers off my body, and springing off my bed, only to faceplant the floor in epic fashion, stubbing my toe on the metal corner of my bed as I fell.

โ€œJesus, Mary, Joseph and the donkey,โ€ I cried out, along with an array of colorful curse words. Twisting onto my back, I let out a strangled keening noise, as I grabbed my foot and held it to my chest. โ€œOw, ow, owโ€ฆโ€

My bedroom door swung inwards then, revealing my worried looking father standing in the doorway.

โ€œWhat in the name of Christ are ya doing, Aoif?โ€ he asked, pressing a hand to his chest. โ€œI thought there was a cat on heat in your room with the noises you were making.โ€

โ€œNo cat on heat. Justโ€ฆ me,โ€ I mumbled, letting my head fall back against my bedroom carpet, pride โ€“ and toe โ€“ wounded. โ€œWhat are you doing?โ€

โ€œJoeyโ€™s giving me a hand to replace the old bathroom,โ€ Dad explained. โ€œYour mother wants the bath taken out, and an electric shower put in instead.โ€

โ€œSounds expensive,โ€ I replied, wondering how we could afford a new bathroom. โ€œWhatโ€™s wrong with what we already have?โ€

โ€œYou know your mother,โ€ Dad said with a weary sigh.

Yeah, I did, and I knew my father, too.

What Mam wanted, Dad got for her, regardless of whether he could afford it or not, usually as a form of compensation for his latest slip.

A new bathroom was a small price to pay for his wandering eye, I suppose.

It wouldnโ€™t do me an ounce of good to know the name of my fatherโ€™s latest mistake.

Not when I already knew the names of too many of the ones that had come before this one.

Frowning, Dad said, โ€œAh, Jaysus, Aoife, throw some clothes on, will ya?โ€ He gestured to my bare legs. โ€œYour brotherโ€™s downstairs with his friends, and Iโ€™ve the young fella over from work.โ€

โ€œI was in bed,โ€ I shot back defensively, pulling at the hem of my string top in a piss-poor attempt to conceal my thighs. โ€œAnd Iโ€™m in my own room. I donโ€™t make a habit of walking around in my knickers, Dad.โ€

โ€œStill,โ€ he grumbled, looking embarrassed, as he quickly turned on his heels and disappeared into the bathroom. โ€œDid you ever hear of pajamas? And itโ€™s ten o clock in the morning. Shouldnโ€™t you be out of bed and doing something productive?โ€

Did you ever hear of doing something productive like keeping your dick in your pants?

โ€œIn case it slipped your attention, itโ€™s like twenty-three degrees outside, which is freakishly rare for us, hence the knickers,โ€ I tossed back. โ€œAnd as for the lack of productivity, I have two days left of my summer holidays before school starts back up on Monday, and Iโ€™m thrown into revising for the Junior Cert, father dearest, and I have every intention of making the most of said days.โ€

โ€œSo?โ€ I heard him call out from the bathroom. โ€œThatโ€™s no excuse to laze around all weekend. You should find something productive to do.โ€

โ€œAnd you should find yourself a moral compass.โ€

โ€œWhat was that, love?โ€

โ€œNothing.โ€ Feeling my heart sink into the pit of my stomach, I climbed to my feet. โ€œNothing at all, Dad.โ€

What a lovely way to end the summer holidays,ย I thought to myself dejectedly, as I padded across my room to close my door.ย Your fatherโ€™s fucking around again, and instead of dealing with your fatherโ€™s infidelity, your motherโ€™s spent the savings on a new bloody bathroom.

โ€œThatโ€™s loaded into the van, Tony. Do you want to strip that Lino flooring while weโ€™re at it? That way, we only need to make the one trip to the dumpโ€ฆโ€ Joeyโ€™s voice trailed off when he stopped short in the landing, just outside my bedroom door, and right in front of yours truly.

The minute his eyes landed on my bare legs; I felt a flush of heat wash over my skin. I didnโ€™t feel the need to hide my body, not when I was thrilled that he was finally looking.

Besides, I wasnโ€™t the self-conscious type. I had a nice body, and I wasnโ€™t about to convince myself that I hadnโ€™t, especially when the rest of the world was more than willing to chip away at a teenagerโ€™s self-esteem.

โ€œEnjoying the show?โ€ I teased, planting my hands on my hips, when his eyes continued to trail over me. I thought it was quite poetic that I returned the same sarcastic question heโ€™d asked me once before.

In equally unapologetic fashion, he took his sweet time returning his gaze to my face. โ€œIt beats the view of your fatherโ€™s ass crack, thatโ€™s for sure.โ€

I arched a brow. โ€œIt?โ€

Humor danced in his eyes, a rare change from the usual, generic fuck-the-world-and-everyone-in-it glower he doled out to just about everyone. โ€œYou.โ€

It wasnโ€™t like we hadnโ€™t seen each other during the summer. Iโ€™d swung by the garage on many the occasion to torment him when he was working with Dad, and Iโ€™d been to most of his and Paulโ€™s matches, but we had been surrounded by friends or my dad.

Ridiculous as it sounded, I missed our little one-on-one moments.

Sure, they might have occurred against his will at times, but I knew that he enjoyed my banter as much as I enjoyed his.

Heart bucking wilder than necessary, given the fact that it was only the boyโ€™s eyes that were on me, and not his hands, I reached up and brushed my thumb over his swollen bottom lip, addicted to tormenting him. โ€œWhatโ€™s that on your mouth, Joe; drool?โ€

โ€œDonโ€™t do that.โ€ His green eyes darkened. โ€œNot here.โ€

โ€œDonโ€™t do what?โ€ Tone heavily laced with sarcasm, I traced his bottom lip with my thumb and grinned. โ€œThis?โ€

โ€œPlay your games when your father is across the landing.โ€

โ€œWhy not?โ€ I teased, hell bent on playing games. โ€œAre you afraid heโ€™ll catch you looking at his daughter like you want to eat her up.โ€ I stepped closer, waiting for him to crack and be the first to move away. โ€œDo you, Joe? Do you want to eat me up?โ€

Reaching up, Joey snatched my wrist with his big hand, but instead of pushing me away like I was prepared for him to do, he pulled me towards him โ€“ so close that my body was pressed against his.

โ€œDonโ€™t try to fuck with my head, Molloy.โ€ His voice was low and heated, and held the hint of warning. โ€œI indulge you by playing your little games, but donโ€™t push your luck.โ€

โ€œMy luck?โ€ I breathed, heart racing violently, as I watched him watch me.

โ€œYour luck,โ€ he confirmed. โ€œThereโ€™s only so far you can push me.โ€

I could do nothing but stare at his face and resist the urge to slap it โ€“ or kiss it.

I wasnโ€™t sure which.

โ€œIโ€™m not Ricey. I wonโ€™t kiss your cheek and hold your hand,โ€ he added, tone heated. โ€œYou keep goading me into touching you and thatโ€™s exactly what Iโ€™m going to do.โ€ His pupils dilated and my heart hammered recklessly against my ribcage. โ€œYou might think that youโ€™re brave enough to take me on, to go toe to toe with me, but make no mistake about this.โ€ Leaning in close, he pressed his lips to my ear, and whispered, โ€œYouโ€™re not the wolf in our story, Molloy.โ€œ His breath fanned my cheek, causing my pulse to skyrocket. โ€œYouโ€™re the lamb.โ€

โ€œWhatโ€™s that, Joey, lad?โ€ my father called out from where he was kneeling in the bathroom, with his back to the landing.

โ€œNothing, Tony,โ€ Joey called back, not moving one muscle, as he turned his attention back to me. โ€œYouโ€™re the sweet, innocent lamb thatโ€™s hellbent on playing with fire,โ€ he said, walking me backwards until my legs hit my bed. โ€œSo, you might want to stop hunting me, Molloy.โ€ His hands moved to my hips, and he literally tossed me down on the mattress. โ€œBecause if you donโ€™t?โ€ With my wrists pinned to the mattress above my head, he stepped between my legs and leaned in close, so close that his nose brushed mine. โ€œThen one of these days, Iโ€™m going to hunt you back.โ€

Oh fuck.

โ€œYou got that?โ€ Releasing one wrist, he swiftly cupped my chin and forced me to look at him. โ€œFriend?โ€

โ€œIโ€™ve got it.โ€ Breathless and feeling faint, I felt myself nodding. โ€œFriend.โ€

โ€œGood girl.โ€

I narrowed my eyes. โ€œYou dick.โ€

He grinned victoriously down at me before releasing me and walking out of my room to rejoin my father in the bathroom.

On shaky legs, I hurried towards my bedroom door and slammed it shut, before blowing out a ragged breath. โ€œHoly shit.โ€

Did that just happen?


A few hours later,ย after a whole lot of soul-searching and not a lot of job hunting, I found myself sprawled out on a towel on the lawn in our back garden, soaking in the last of the sunrays from the unusual heatwave, with the family dog curled up on the grass beside me.

Still mentally chewing over my earlier altercation with my classmate, I had been ordered by my father to go downstairs and stay out of their way.

My father had hit his limit this morning, when I had continued to hover in the bathroom doorway, making smart-ass comments about their shoddy work, and tormenting his precious apprentice.

It wasnโ€™t my fault.

The boy was too damn distracting to not stare at, and too sharp-tongued to not play with, but that didnโ€™t matter to Dad.

Banished from my own bedroom doorway for distracting my fatherโ€™s, and I quote, โ€˜poor young fellaโ€™, I had retreated to the garden with the dog.

Ugh.

โ€œWhat do you think, Spud?โ€ Reaching down, I stroked his neck. โ€œHmm? Iโ€™m not a lamb, am I?โ€

Spud, who was a mix between a boxer and at least three other breeds, let out a groan of contentment, rolling onto his back and kicking wildly when I scratched his ear.

โ€œExactly,โ€ I cooed. โ€œA lamb could never give you such good ear scratches. That boy is full of crap.โ€ย And sexy as hell.

โ€œDo you mind?โ€ A dark shadow fell over me, blocking the sun. โ€œMy friends are here.โ€

โ€œAnd?โ€ I drawled, using my foot to kick my brother out of my way of the sunshine.

โ€œAnd Iโ€™m trying to play WWE,โ€ Kevin growled, shoving me back with his foot. โ€œBut they keep coming downstairs for drinks.โ€

โ€œDonโ€™t touch me with your freaky fungus feet,โ€ I warned. โ€œAnd so? What do your creepy little friends have to do with me?โ€

โ€œItโ€™s called athletes foot,โ€ Kev shot back defensively. โ€œAnd theyโ€™re not coming downstairs for drinks, dickhead, theyโ€™re coming down to gawk at you.โ€

Sliding my sunglasses off, I pulled myself onto my elbows and glared up at the scrawny little shit. โ€œDonโ€™t call me a dickhead, dickhead.โ€

โ€œAoife, come on,โ€ he said, gesturing to where I was sprawled out. โ€œCanโ€™t you do that inside?โ€

โ€œCanโ€™t I sunbathe inside? Why no, Kevin, sorry but I canโ€™t. Thatโ€™s not how sunbathing works,โ€ I deadpanned, readjusting the strap of my yellow bikini top.

โ€œThen cover yourself up.โ€

โ€œThatโ€™s not how sunbathing works either, Kev.โ€

โ€œAoife,โ€ he groaned, tone whiny now. โ€œCome on, youโ€™re embarrassing me. Just go inside or put some clothes on.โ€

โ€œHow many days of sunshine do we get in Ireland, Kev?โ€ I asked my half-twin.

Yeah, we might have shared a womb for nine months, but that was all we had in common. The truth was that we couldnโ€™t have been any different from each other.

โ€œThe answer is not enough,โ€ I told him. โ€œNot enough by half. Besides, Dadโ€™s upstairs, putting a new bathroom in with Joey, and Iโ€™ve already been banished.โ€

โ€œYeah, I saw he brought him over again,โ€ my brother grumbled. โ€œHe could have asked me to help him with the bathroom.โ€

โ€œHa,โ€ I laughed. โ€œLike you know the first thing about manual labor.โ€

โ€œHe could show me,โ€ Kev snapped in a defensive tone. โ€œIโ€™m a faster learner than that thick fucker upstairs.โ€

โ€œDonโ€™t call him thick,โ€ I warned, hackles rising. โ€œHeโ€™s more world wise than youโ€™ll ever be.โ€

Kev rolled his eyes. โ€œOh yeah, because knowing where to score drugs takes a real genius.โ€

โ€œSo, he smokes weed occasionally,โ€ I heard myself defend. โ€œBig deal, Kev. So do a lot of other people in our year. It doesnโ€™t make him a bad person.โ€

โ€œIt doesnโ€™t make him a good one either,โ€ he shot back. โ€œWhy are you always defending him?โ€

โ€œBecause heโ€™s my friend, Kevin.โ€

โ€œYeah? Well, your friend does a lot more than smoke weed.โ€

โ€œLike youโ€™d know.โ€

โ€œIย would, actually,โ€ he replied. โ€œIโ€™m in his year, too, remember. I know what goes on just as well as you do.โ€

โ€œYeah, in the swot class,โ€ I snorted. โ€œAndย sureย you do, Kev. Youโ€™re right in there with the big guns, arenโ€™t ya? Mister popularity himself.โ€

โ€œYou think your looks and popularity are going to get you far in life?โ€ he laughed. โ€œYouโ€™re so stupid that itโ€™s pitiful.โ€

โ€œLook at you, getting all riled up and catty.โ€ I grinned. โ€œNo need to pity me, dear brother, because Iโ€™m doing just fine for myself.โ€

โ€œNo, Aoife,ย Iโ€™mย doing fine.ย Iโ€™mย the one going places. The only way youโ€™re getting out of this council estate is if you marry up,โ€ he sneered. โ€œBecause you sure as shit wonโ€™t make it on your own. So, you might want to hold onto Paul Rice, because heโ€™s looking like your best shot.โ€

โ€œOh, whatever, you dick.โ€

โ€œItโ€™s the truth.โ€œ

โ€œKeep talking shit to me and I just might have to take my top off and give those gamer buddies of yours a real special show.โ€

He narrowed his eyes. โ€œYou wouldnโ€™t dare.โ€

โ€œTry me.โ€ Narrowing my eyes right back at him, I reached for the string behind my neck and said, โ€œIโ€™m told I have perky nipples.โ€

โ€œYouโ€™re such a bitch,โ€ he spat before storming back to the house.

โ€œTakes one to know one, you little pussy,โ€ I called after him and then sighed in contentment, thrilled to have gotten the better of him. โ€œGood one, huh?โ€ I cooed, tickling Spud on his belly. โ€œYeah, I know you think heโ€™s a dope, too. I donโ€™t need a boy, do I? No, I donโ€™t. Iโ€™ll make my own way in life.โ€

โ€œAoife Christina Molloy!โ€ my mother called out a few minutes later. Pushing the kitchen window open, she leaned out and shook a wooden spoon at me. โ€œGet into the house and cover yourself up before I come out there and drag you inside.โ€

โ€œAre you serious?โ€ I growled, giving Spud one final belly rub, before reluctantly climbing to my feet. โ€œHeย toldย on me?โ€

โ€œThere are teenage boys in this house, Aoife,โ€ Mam shot back. โ€œAnd youโ€™re sprawled out in the garden like Pamela fecking Anderson herself. Do you want to be the cause of giving them a turn?โ€

โ€œI know how old they are, Mam. Most of them are in my year at school.โ€ I laughed. โ€œAnd youโ€™re afraid Iโ€™ll give them a turn? More like a horn โ€”โ€œ

โ€œDonโ€™t you dare finish that sentence,โ€ Mam warned, still waving around the wooden spoon like a demented housewife.

โ€œYeah, well, Dad told me to stay out of his way,โ€ I shot back. โ€œSo, guess what Iโ€™m doing?โ€

โ€œEnough of the cheek, young lady. Inside right now, or youโ€™re grounded for the rest of the month. And that also includes having friends over. No phone, either. And noโ€”โ€

โ€œJesus, fine,โ€ I huffed, stalking to the back door. โ€œRelax, would you. Itโ€™s not that serious.โ€

โ€œThank you,โ€ Mam said when I stomped into the kitchen. โ€œNow, go upstairs and throw on some clothes, like a good girl, before your brother has a conniption fit.โ€

โ€œIs it okay if I get a drink before Iโ€™m exiled from the family home for possessing a pair of boobs?โ€ I asked sulkily, as I reached into the fridge and grabbed a carton of orange juice. โ€œOr is rehydrating a crime now, too?โ€

โ€œDrama queen.โ€ Rolling her eyes, Mam smirked and turned back to her ironing. โ€œPour me a glass, too.โ€

Grabbing two glasses out of the press, I poured a glass of orange juice and quickly gulped it down before refilling my glass and pouring one for Mam.

โ€œThanks, love.โ€

โ€œYouโ€™re not welcome,โ€ I teased, setting a glass down on the counter beside her.

โ€œTrish, weโ€™ve the bathroom just about done, love. Iโ€™m off to the dump with that old bath before they close,โ€ my father called from the front hall. โ€œI wonโ€™t be long.โ€

โ€œIโ€™ll see ya, Trish. Thanks for the sandwich.โ€

โ€œYouโ€™re welcome, Joey, love.โ€

Resisting the urge to rush out into the hallway and take one last look at Joey Lynch before he left with my dad, I held firm, and took another sip of orange juice instead.

โ€œMake sure you take that old Lino with you, Tony,โ€ Mam called back, not bothering to look up from her ironing board. โ€œAnd thereโ€™s a few bags of rubbish at the side of the house that could do with being cleared out.โ€

โ€œAlready taken care of.โ€

โ€œGood man yourself.โ€

โ€œA little heads up that Joey was coming over wouldโ€™ve been nice,โ€ I said once as the front door closed behind them.

โ€œAh, heโ€™s a lovely boy, isnโ€™t he? Such a hard little worker,โ€ Mam gushed, smiling into her ironing. โ€œI thought youโ€™d be delighted to see him. The two of you are great little friends at school, isnโ€™t that right?โ€

โ€œYeah, weโ€™re buds,โ€ I agreed, suppressing a laugh. โ€œA headโ€™s up wouldโ€™ve been nice, though.โ€

โ€œItโ€™s a shame that he and your brother donโ€™t seem to gel,โ€ Mam added with a sigh.

โ€œThatโ€™s not on Joey, Mam. Kev doesnโ€™t gel with anyone,โ€ I snorted, resting my hip against the counter. โ€œHeโ€™s too stuck-up.โ€

โ€œAoife.โ€

โ€œWhat?โ€ I threw a hand up. โ€œItโ€™s true.โ€

โ€œIt would do your brother no harm to get off that computer and spend some time at the garage. Iโ€™m sure if he gave it a chance, theyโ€™d find some common ground.โ€

โ€œCommon ground with who? Dad or Joey? Because, no offense, Mam, but your darling baby boy thinks heโ€™s above the both of them. Kev doesnโ€™t have any intention of getting his hands dirty. He has too high of an opinion of himself to slum it with us normal folk.โ€

โ€œHe does not,โ€ she scolded. โ€œDonโ€™t be mean.โ€

โ€œSo, whatโ€™s the story with the new bathroom?โ€ I decided to change the subject by asking, unwilling to give my dope of a brother another second of airtime.

โ€œWhat do you mean?โ€

โ€œYou know what I mean, Mam.โ€

โ€œNothing, love.โ€ My mother, who looked a lot like what I presumed the forty-something-year-old version of me would look like, smiled brightly.ย Too brightly. โ€œIt was just time for a change.โ€

โ€œMam,โ€ I sighed, reaching over to stroke her leg with my foot. โ€œAre you okay?โ€

I knew she wasnโ€™t.

Her heart had been broken by my father for what had to be the fourth time in a matter of years โ€“ that I was aware of.

โ€œI will be,โ€ she replied, tone forcefully cheerful, as she tucked a blonde wisp of hair behind her ear. โ€œIโ€™m looking forward to a nice hot shower tonight.โ€

โ€œSo, who was it this time?โ€ I asked then, poking the bear. I didnโ€™t really want to know, or at least, I shouldnโ€™t want to know, but I asked her anyway because I was a glutton for punishment. Reaching into her pile of neatly folded ironing that was stacked on the kitchen table, I retrieved a t-shirt and pulled it on. โ€œWas it a one-off, or was it going on for a while?โ€

โ€œI donโ€™t want to talk about it, Aoife,โ€ Mam replied quietly. โ€œAnd I donโ€™t want you to think badly of him, either. Heโ€™s a good man, deep down, and a wonderful father.โ€

โ€œYeah, he is a good father,โ€ I agreed, setting my empty glass in the sink. โ€œBut heโ€™s a shitty husband, Mam.โ€

She, on the other hand, was a good wife, and a great mam, but that didnโ€™t change the fact that her constant stream of forgiveness looked an awful lot like weakness in my eyes.

Sure, they seemed to have a decent relationship โ€“ when Dad wasnโ€™t letting his wandering eye get in the way. In a weird way, they were pretty stable, and never seemed to let any discourse in their marriage interfere with mine or Kevโ€™s lives.

โ€œHe makes a lot of mistakes,โ€ Mam agreed, handing me the denim shorts she had just finished ironing.

โ€œToo many mistakes,โ€ I offered, stepping into my shorts and dragging them up my hips. โ€œToo many times.โ€

โ€œI know you have your own thoughts and opinions on how I should react to this,โ€ she said evenly. โ€œBut itโ€™s a lot easier to know what to do when itโ€™s another personโ€™s life youโ€™re judging.โ€

โ€œIt seems pretty black and white to me.โ€

โ€œThatโ€™s because youโ€™re young.โ€ She smiled. โ€œThe whole world isnโ€™t black and white, Aoife. Thereโ€™s a whole lot of grey in the middle.โ€

โ€œI donโ€™t understand,โ€ I admitted with a frustrated sigh. โ€œI donโ€™t get how you can stay with him when heโ€™s proven that he canโ€™t be trusted.โ€ I shook my head and pointed to her. โ€œLook at how ridey you are, Mam.โ€

โ€œRidey?โ€

โ€œIt means desirable,โ€ I explained. โ€œBeautiful, gorgeous, fuckable โ€”โ€œ

โ€œOkay,โ€ Mam laughed softly. โ€œThank you for compliment, but thatโ€™s enough of the bad language.โ€

โ€œWell, itโ€™s true. You are stunning, Mam,โ€ I pushed. โ€œKev thinks his weirdo buddies are coming downstairs to see me, when half of the time itโ€™s to sneak a peek at you.โ€

โ€œAoife,โ€ she chuckled.

Sighing, I asked, โ€œWhy do you put up with it, Mam?โ€

โ€œI love him,โ€ she replied. โ€œI have invested more than twenty years of my life into the man and had my children with him. And believe it or not, he loves me, too.โ€

โ€œThen maybe he needs to love you better,โ€ I told her. โ€œBecause his words and his actions arenโ€™t exactly aligning, Mam.โ€

โ€œNo marriage is perfect.โ€

โ€œNo,โ€ I agreed. โ€œBut not all wives are cheated on, either.โ€

โ€œWhat about Paul?โ€ Mam asked, steering the conversation towards me, tone defensive. โ€œYou love him, donโ€™t you? Imagine having spent most of your life raising a family together and then having toโ€”โ€

โ€œNo.โ€

Mam blinked in surprise. โ€œNo?โ€

โ€œNo,โ€ I confirmed, with a shake of my head. โ€œI donโ€™t love Paul, and I have no plans on that status changing.โ€

โ€œWhy not?โ€

โ€œBecause I have no intention of giving a boy that kind of power over me,โ€ I replied simply. โ€œFrom my viewpoint, men let you down โ€“ even the good ones like dad canโ€™t be trusted. So, why would I ever expose myself to that kind of pain? It would be emotional suicide.โ€

Mam looked flabbergasted as she let out a small laugh. โ€œAoife, if you donโ€™t have feelings for the poor boy, then why in Godโ€™s name have you been going out with him for the past year and a half?โ€

โ€œBecause Iย chooseย to,โ€ I explained. โ€œNot because Iย needย to.โ€

โ€œAnd what about Paul?โ€ she demanded. โ€œHave you spared a thought for his feelings?โ€

โ€œI never said I didnโ€™t care about him, Mam, of course I care.โ€ Shrugging, I added, โ€œIโ€™m fond of him โ€“ obviously. I just donโ€™t have those crazy deep feelings that cloud common sense.โ€

She arched a brow. โ€œFond?โ€

I shrugged. โ€œWhatโ€™s wrong with fond?โ€

โ€œFond isnโ€™t a word a girl normally uses to describe her feelings towards her boyfriend.โ€

โ€œWell, thatโ€™s all I have, Mam.โ€

โ€œBut โ€”โ€œ

โ€œAnd if you think that Paul Rice is in love with me, then youโ€™re wrong,โ€ I was quick to point out. โ€œHis feelings are as replaceable to him as I am. If we broke up in the morning, I could guarantee you that it wouldnโ€™t take him more than a week, two tops, to move on to someone else.โ€

โ€œAoife,โ€ Mam gasped.

โ€œWhat? Itโ€™s true.โ€ Laughing, I waved a hand idly in the air. โ€œThatโ€™s how fleeting boysโ€™ feelings are โ€“ and I donโ€™t just mean Paul, either. Thatโ€™s all boys. Sure, he might be pride-hurt, but he would forget about me pretty quickly.โ€

โ€œButโ€”โ€œ

โ€œCome on, Mam, itโ€™s like youโ€™ve just said; youโ€™ve been married to Dad for twenty years, and that hasnโ€™t stopped him from forgetting about you every time he strays.โ€

โ€œSo, this way of thinking is because of our marriage?โ€

โ€œMaybe?โ€ I shrugged. โ€œI donโ€™t know.โ€

โ€œI hope not.โ€

โ€œBut even if it is, Iโ€™m glad because it prepared me for the inevitable. Donโ€™t catch feelings and you wonโ€™t get hurt.โ€ I smiled. โ€œSimple.โ€

โ€œSo, youโ€™re saying that you never want to fall in love and get married?โ€

โ€œItโ€™s not like Iโ€™m one hundred million percent opposed to the idea of marriage and motherhood. If the right guy came along and proved me wrong, then sure, I could do it,โ€ I admitted. โ€œBut I could never cope with the crap youโ€™ve had to deal with. I could never do that, Mam. And certainly not with your grace. If I loved a man, and I mean truly, madly, deeply loved him, then I could never handle knowing that he was with another woman. It would destroy me. I would go insane. I could never forgive that level of betrayal. Hence why taking that chance seems too risky to me. So yeah, Iโ€™m probably going remain ring-free for the foreseeable forty plus years.โ€

โ€œSo, you wouldnโ€™t care if say Paul went off with another girl?โ€ Mam questioned. โ€œYou know, since you donโ€™t love him and all?โ€

โ€œHonestly, Iโ€™d probably be pissed off, but mostly relieved.โ€

Mam gaped. โ€œRelieved?โ€

โ€œYeah,โ€ I replied. โ€œBecause he would have proven what Iโ€™ve known all along; that no man can be trusted.โ€

โ€œOh, I donโ€™t know, Aoife, love,โ€ Mam said, worrying her lip. โ€œThatโ€™s an awfully cynical way of thinking.โ€

โ€œPractical.โ€ I winked. โ€œItโ€™s aย practicalย way of thinking โ€“ and clearly the right way of thinking, considering the rumors Iโ€™ve heard.โ€

Mam gave me a disconcerting look. โ€œWhatย kindย of rumors?โ€

I arched a brow and gave her aย what do you thinkย look.

โ€œHeย cheatedย on you?โ€ she demanded, immediately catching my drift. โ€œThen what are you doing with him?โ€

โ€œHa!โ€ I folded my arms across my chest. โ€œPot, meet kettle.โ€

She sighed heavily. โ€œAoife, love, you donโ€™t have to put up with that sort of thing.โ€

โ€œI know that I donโ€™t,โ€ I agreed. โ€œAnd donโ€™t worry, Iโ€™ve confronted Paul about the rumors.โ€

โ€œAnd?โ€

I shrugged. โ€œHe says itโ€™s all a pack of lies.โ€

โ€œBut you donโ€™t believe him?โ€

โ€œWould you?โ€

Mam gave me a sympathetic look.

โ€œI donโ€™t believe a single word that comes out of a single boyโ€™s mouth,โ€ I told her.

Thatโ€™s not technically true.

You believeย oneย boy.

โ€œAnd how long have theseย rumorsย been circling?โ€

Longer than I cared to admit to my mother. โ€œA while.โ€

โ€œDo you know for sure that he hasnโ€™t cheated on you?โ€

โ€œCan anyone know that for sure?โ€

โ€œNo, I suppose not.โ€

โ€œExactly.โ€

โ€œThen why would you stay with him, Aoife?โ€

โ€œWhy do you stay with Dad?โ€

โ€œThatโ€™s not a fair comparison,โ€ she replied. โ€œWeโ€™re married.โ€

โ€œExactly,โ€ I agreed. โ€œYouโ€™reย married,ย committed,ย in love,ย investedย in one another, and itย stillย happens. He still fucks you overย repeatedly. So, if Iโ€™ve learned anything from you and Dad, itโ€™s that no man, no matter how perfect he seems, can be trusted.โ€

โ€œYou shouldnโ€™t be afraid to love a boy, Aoife.โ€ Sadness filled her voice as she spoke. โ€œPlease donโ€™t let our mistakes hold you back in life. It would break my heart to think that our relationship affected you to the point where you struggle to commit your heart to someone.โ€

โ€œIโ€™m not afraid of loving a boy,โ€ I told her honestly. โ€œIโ€™m afraid of losing myself in one.โ€

โ€œI hate to tell you this, but more often than not, the two go hand in hand.โ€

โ€œI know.โ€ย Thatโ€™s what scares me.

โ€œAoife.โ€

โ€œEnough of the heavy.โ€ Patting my motherโ€™s shoulder, I gave her a bright smile before heading for the door. โ€œIโ€™m hot and sticky and in dire need of a shower.โ€

โ€œDonโ€™t you dare use that shower before I do,โ€ Mam called after me. โ€œI mean it, young lady, Iโ€™m having the first go of it.โ€

โ€œUnderstood,โ€ I replied as I hurried up the staircase, with every intention of doing just that.

Whipping off my t-shirt, I snatched a towel out of the hot-press, and legged it into the bathroom, cackling mischievously to myself.

โ€œI mean it, Aoife Molloy, donโ€™t even think about it!โ€

โ€œI wonโ€™t,โ€ I laughed, closing and locking the door shut before my mother could finish her threat.

Feeling smug, I stripped off the rest of my clothes and rubbed my hands together in gleeful anticipation, as I stepped into the fancy new shower and switched it on.

The motor roared to life, but nothing came out.

Not so much as a drop of water.

โ€œWhat the hell?โ€ I growled, twisting and turning the knobs in front of me. โ€œWork, dammit, work.โ€œ

A knock sounded on the bathroom door then, and I blew out a frustrated breath.

Stomping over to my towel, I quickly wrapped it around my body, and unlocked the door before swinging it open. โ€œI know what it looks like, but I swear I wasnโ€™t going to use it before youโ€ฆโ€

My words trailed off when my eyes landed on Joey.

โ€œYouโ€™re back.โ€

โ€œIโ€™m back.โ€

โ€œWell good.โ€ Tightening my hold on my towel, I gripped the door and tried to play it cool. โ€œBecause youโ€™ve done a crappy job installing this shower. The stupid thing doesnโ€™t even work.โ€

โ€œI know,โ€ he replied, as he stepped around me and walked over the toilet. โ€œThatโ€™s why Iโ€™m back.โ€ Crouching down in front of the toilet, he reached behind the cistern. โ€œForgot to switch the stopcock back on.โ€

โ€œThe stopcock?โ€ I laughed. โ€œWhat the hell is that?โ€

Twisting the knob on a valve, Joey reached up and flushed the toilet and then hovered over the bowl, watching the water circle. Seemingly satisfied with that, Joey stood up and walked over to the shower and switched it on. This time, when the motor roared to life, it was accompanied by a steady spray of water coming from the jets. โ€œTa-da.โ€

โ€œYay!!โ€ I clapped in delight. โ€œMy hero.โ€

โ€œEasy to please you, Molloy.โ€

โ€œThatโ€™s impressive, Joe.โ€

He snorted. โ€œI turned the water back on.โ€

โ€œI wouldnโ€™t have known how to do that.โ€

He shrugged and moved for the sink, turning on the tap to wash his hands. โ€œWell, enjoy your shower.โ€

โ€œOh, donโ€™t worry, I plan to. Thanks again, Joe.โ€

โ€œAnytime.โ€

Switching the tap off, he looked around for a towel, and when he couldnโ€™t find one, he walked over to where I was standing and dried his hands on the bottom of my towel.

โ€œHey,โ€ I growled, slapping at his hands. โ€œRude.โ€

โ€œNice towel,โ€ he shot back with a cheeky wink before moving for the door. โ€œIโ€™ll be seeing ya, Molloy.โ€

โ€œHold up.โ€ My heart pounded loudly in my chest as I followed him to the door, slipping around him to press my back to the wood.ย And keep him for a little bit longer.ย โ€œAre you going to your match now?โ€

He didnโ€™t look happy when he said, โ€œThatโ€™s the plan.โ€

โ€œDo you even want to play?โ€

My question seemed to throw him because his furrowed his brow in confusion. โ€œWhy would you even ask that?โ€

โ€œBecause you never look happy on the pitch,โ€ I replied, readjusting my hold on my towel. Looking up at his face, I offered him a sad smile. โ€œYou never look happy anywhere.โ€

โ€œAnd youโ€™d know all about that, wouldnโ€™t you?โ€ he was quick to counter, immediately on the defense, as his walls shot up around him. โ€œWatching everything I do like a fucking stalker.โ€

โ€œLower the gun, Joe.โ€ Knowing every one of his tricks, I kept my tone even when I said, โ€œIโ€™m not the enemy.โ€

Joey glowered at me for a long moment before the hostility in his eyes eventually gave way to resignation. โ€œI know.โ€ Blinking, he released a harsh breath and shook his head. โ€œI know, Molloy.โ€

โ€œI know you do,โ€ I replied, reaching up to rub the prickly fuckerโ€™s shoulder. โ€œItโ€™s okay. I forgive you.โ€

Heat blazed in his dark eyes when he snapped, โ€œIโ€™m not sorry.โ€

Yes, he was.

โ€œI know.โ€ Reaching up, I ruffled his blond hair and grinned. โ€œI still forgive you.โ€

Unable to conceal his discomfort, or his agitated state in general, he ran a hand through his hair and gestured to where I was standing. โ€œCan you move aside so I can leave? Iโ€™m going to be late for the match.โ€

โ€œIโ€™ll move aside,โ€ I told him. โ€œIf you promise to wait for me.โ€

He frowned. โ€œWait for you?โ€

โ€œYeah.โ€ I smiled. โ€œIโ€™m coming with you.โ€

โ€œComing with me?โ€ Another frown. โ€œWhere?โ€

โ€œYouโ€™re going to the GAA pitch. Iโ€™m going to the GAA pitch. We can keep each other company on the walk.โ€

โ€œNo.โ€

โ€œYes.โ€

โ€œYouโ€™re not coming with me.โ€

โ€œOh, yes I am.โ€

Joey stared at me in horror, walls shooting back up at a rapid rate. โ€œIn what alternative universe did I give you the impression that I would want you to come with me?โ€

โ€œHow about the universe where you quit pretending that my mere presence irritates you and admit that you adore the ground I walk on.โ€

His mouth fell open. โ€œI do not.โ€

โ€œYou do, too.โ€ Smiling up at him, I patted his shoulder. โ€œFriend.โ€

โ€œIโ€™m not yourโ€”โ€œ

โ€œDonโ€™t even think about finishing that sentence.โ€

Swiftly clamping his mouth shut, he swallowed. He stared at me for the longest time before growling, โ€œYou have five minutes and then Iโ€™m leaving.โ€

Grinning in victory, I patted his chest before stepping aside and moving for the shower. โ€œIโ€™ll be ready in twenty minutes.โ€

โ€œTen,โ€ he bit out, swinging the bathroom door open. โ€œOr Iโ€™m leaving without you.โ€

โ€œTwenty,โ€ I called over my shoulder as I dropped my towel and climbed into the shower. โ€œYou can wait in my room.โ€

The bathroom door slammed behind him, and then I heard him say, โ€œFifteen and thatโ€™s final.โ€

โ€œTwenty,โ€ I crooned, thoroughly enjoying his agitation.

โ€œYouโ€™re a pain in my hole.โ€

I laughed.

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