Part 3 โ THIRD YEAR
SEPTEMBER 1ST 2001
AOIFE
โWHEREโDย you want me to toss the old one?โ
Jerking awake at the sound of the familiar voice, I sprang up in my bed and craned my neck to hear better.
โThrow it out in the yard.โ That was my dadโs voice. โIโll load it into the van later and take it to the dump.โ
โYou sure?โ My eyes widened in horror. โItโs a cast iron tub. Could be worth something if ya take it to Timmy Murphy over in Glenmore? He wheels and deals in scrap.โ
โHe has a young one in the same year as yourself and the twins, doesnโt he?โ
โNeasa. Yeah, sheโs in my class. Listen, I could give him a buzz, if you want? He might throw ya a score for it.โ
โNah, the thing is on its last legs. Itโs red rotten underneath. It wouldnโt make the price of the diesel it would cost me to drive it over there.โ
Oh my god.
โFair enough.โ
He did not!
โGood man, Joey, can you carry that downstairs on your own?โ
He did!
โYeah, Tony, itโs not a bother. Iโll have to head off around three today, though. Iโve a match at the pavilion.โ
Dad brought him home.
โJesus, son, youโre as strong as an ox. And thatโs not a bother. Weโll have it finished by then.โ
Again!
And I looked like something that had been dragged through a ditch.
Perfect.
The prospect of seeing Joey, after spending a whole summer of not seeing his face every weekday morning in class, had me throwing the covers off my body, and springing off my bed, only to faceplant the floor in epic fashion, stubbing my toe on the metal corner of my bed as I fell.
โJesus, Mary, Joseph and the donkey,โ I cried out, along with an array of colorful curse words. Twisting onto my back, I let out a strangled keening noise, as I grabbed my foot and held it to my chest. โOw, ow, owโฆโ
My bedroom door swung inwards then, revealing my worried looking father standing in the doorway.
โWhat in the name of Christ are ya doing, Aoif?โ he asked, pressing a hand to his chest. โI thought there was a cat on heat in your room with the noises you were making.โ
โNo cat on heat. Justโฆ me,โ I mumbled, letting my head fall back against my bedroom carpet, pride โ and toe โ wounded. โWhat are you doing?โ
โJoeyโs giving me a hand to replace the old bathroom,โ Dad explained. โYour mother wants the bath taken out, and an electric shower put in instead.โ
โSounds expensive,โ I replied, wondering how we could afford a new bathroom. โWhatโs wrong with what we already have?โ
โYou know your mother,โ Dad said with a weary sigh.
Yeah, I did, and I knew my father, too.
What Mam wanted, Dad got for her, regardless of whether he could afford it or not, usually as a form of compensation for his latest slip.
A new bathroom was a small price to pay for his wandering eye, I suppose.
It wouldnโt do me an ounce of good to know the name of my fatherโs latest mistake.
Not when I already knew the names of too many of the ones that had come before this one.
Frowning, Dad said, โAh, Jaysus, Aoife, throw some clothes on, will ya?โ He gestured to my bare legs. โYour brotherโs downstairs with his friends, and Iโve the young fella over from work.โ
โI was in bed,โ I shot back defensively, pulling at the hem of my string top in a piss-poor attempt to conceal my thighs. โAnd Iโm in my own room. I donโt make a habit of walking around in my knickers, Dad.โ
โStill,โ he grumbled, looking embarrassed, as he quickly turned on his heels and disappeared into the bathroom. โDid you ever hear of pajamas? And itโs ten o clock in the morning. Shouldnโt you be out of bed and doing something productive?โ
Did you ever hear of doing something productive like keeping your dick in your pants?
โIn case it slipped your attention, itโs like twenty-three degrees outside, which is freakishly rare for us, hence the knickers,โ I tossed back. โAnd as for the lack of productivity, I have two days left of my summer holidays before school starts back up on Monday, and Iโm thrown into revising for the Junior Cert, father dearest, and I have every intention of making the most of said days.โ
โSo?โ I heard him call out from the bathroom. โThatโs no excuse to laze around all weekend. You should find something productive to do.โ
โAnd you should find yourself a moral compass.โ
โWhat was that, love?โ
โNothing.โ Feeling my heart sink into the pit of my stomach, I climbed to my feet. โNothing at all, Dad.โ
What a lovely way to end the summer holidays,ย I thought to myself dejectedly, as I padded across my room to close my door.ย Your fatherโs fucking around again, and instead of dealing with your fatherโs infidelity, your motherโs spent the savings on a new bloody bathroom.
โThatโs loaded into the van, Tony. Do you want to strip that Lino flooring while weโre at it? That way, we only need to make the one trip to the dumpโฆโ Joeyโs voice trailed off when he stopped short in the landing, just outside my bedroom door, and right in front of yours truly.
The minute his eyes landed on my bare legs; I felt a flush of heat wash over my skin. I didnโt feel the need to hide my body, not when I was thrilled that he was finally looking.
Besides, I wasnโt the self-conscious type. I had a nice body, and I wasnโt about to convince myself that I hadnโt, especially when the rest of the world was more than willing to chip away at a teenagerโs self-esteem.
โEnjoying the show?โ I teased, planting my hands on my hips, when his eyes continued to trail over me. I thought it was quite poetic that I returned the same sarcastic question heโd asked me once before.
In equally unapologetic fashion, he took his sweet time returning his gaze to my face. โIt beats the view of your fatherโs ass crack, thatโs for sure.โ
I arched a brow. โIt?โ
Humor danced in his eyes, a rare change from the usual, generic fuck-the-world-and-everyone-in-it glower he doled out to just about everyone. โYou.โ
It wasnโt like we hadnโt seen each other during the summer. Iโd swung by the garage on many the occasion to torment him when he was working with Dad, and Iโd been to most of his and Paulโs matches, but we had been surrounded by friends or my dad.
Ridiculous as it sounded, I missed our little one-on-one moments.
Sure, they might have occurred against his will at times, but I knew that he enjoyed my banter as much as I enjoyed his.
Heart bucking wilder than necessary, given the fact that it was only the boyโs eyes that were on me, and not his hands, I reached up and brushed my thumb over his swollen bottom lip, addicted to tormenting him. โWhatโs that on your mouth, Joe; drool?โ
โDonโt do that.โ His green eyes darkened. โNot here.โ
โDonโt do what?โ Tone heavily laced with sarcasm, I traced his bottom lip with my thumb and grinned. โThis?โ
โPlay your games when your father is across the landing.โ
โWhy not?โ I teased, hell bent on playing games. โAre you afraid heโll catch you looking at his daughter like you want to eat her up.โ I stepped closer, waiting for him to crack and be the first to move away. โDo you, Joe? Do you want to eat me up?โ
Reaching up, Joey snatched my wrist with his big hand, but instead of pushing me away like I was prepared for him to do, he pulled me towards him โ so close that my body was pressed against his.
โDonโt try to fuck with my head, Molloy.โ His voice was low and heated, and held the hint of warning. โI indulge you by playing your little games, but donโt push your luck.โ
โMy luck?โ I breathed, heart racing violently, as I watched him watch me.
โYour luck,โ he confirmed. โThereโs only so far you can push me.โ
I could do nothing but stare at his face and resist the urge to slap it โ or kiss it.
I wasnโt sure which.
โIโm not Ricey. I wonโt kiss your cheek and hold your hand,โ he added, tone heated. โYou keep goading me into touching you and thatโs exactly what Iโm going to do.โ His pupils dilated and my heart hammered recklessly against my ribcage. โYou might think that youโre brave enough to take me on, to go toe to toe with me, but make no mistake about this.โ Leaning in close, he pressed his lips to my ear, and whispered, โYouโre not the wolf in our story, Molloy.โ His breath fanned my cheek, causing my pulse to skyrocket. โYouโre the lamb.โ
โWhatโs that, Joey, lad?โ my father called out from where he was kneeling in the bathroom, with his back to the landing.
โNothing, Tony,โ Joey called back, not moving one muscle, as he turned his attention back to me. โYouโre the sweet, innocent lamb thatโs hellbent on playing with fire,โ he said, walking me backwards until my legs hit my bed. โSo, you might want to stop hunting me, Molloy.โ His hands moved to my hips, and he literally tossed me down on the mattress. โBecause if you donโt?โ With my wrists pinned to the mattress above my head, he stepped between my legs and leaned in close, so close that his nose brushed mine. โThen one of these days, Iโm going to hunt you back.โ
Oh fuck.
โYou got that?โ Releasing one wrist, he swiftly cupped my chin and forced me to look at him. โFriend?โ
โIโve got it.โ Breathless and feeling faint, I felt myself nodding. โFriend.โ
โGood girl.โ
I narrowed my eyes. โYou dick.โ
He grinned victoriously down at me before releasing me and walking out of my room to rejoin my father in the bathroom.
On shaky legs, I hurried towards my bedroom door and slammed it shut, before blowing out a ragged breath. โHoly shit.โ
Did that just happen?
A few hours later,ย after a whole lot of soul-searching and not a lot of job hunting, I found myself sprawled out on a towel on the lawn in our back garden, soaking in the last of the sunrays from the unusual heatwave, with the family dog curled up on the grass beside me.
Still mentally chewing over my earlier altercation with my classmate, I had been ordered by my father to go downstairs and stay out of their way.
My father had hit his limit this morning, when I had continued to hover in the bathroom doorway, making smart-ass comments about their shoddy work, and tormenting his precious apprentice.
It wasnโt my fault.
The boy was too damn distracting to not stare at, and too sharp-tongued to not play with, but that didnโt matter to Dad.
Banished from my own bedroom doorway for distracting my fatherโs, and I quote, โpoor young fellaโ, I had retreated to the garden with the dog.
Ugh.
โWhat do you think, Spud?โ Reaching down, I stroked his neck. โHmm? Iโm not a lamb, am I?โ
Spud, who was a mix between a boxer and at least three other breeds, let out a groan of contentment, rolling onto his back and kicking wildly when I scratched his ear.
โExactly,โ I cooed. โA lamb could never give you such good ear scratches. That boy is full of crap.โย And sexy as hell.
โDo you mind?โ A dark shadow fell over me, blocking the sun. โMy friends are here.โ
โAnd?โ I drawled, using my foot to kick my brother out of my way of the sunshine.
โAnd Iโm trying to play WWE,โ Kevin growled, shoving me back with his foot. โBut they keep coming downstairs for drinks.โ
โDonโt touch me with your freaky fungus feet,โ I warned. โAnd so? What do your creepy little friends have to do with me?โ
โItโs called athletes foot,โ Kev shot back defensively. โAnd theyโre not coming downstairs for drinks, dickhead, theyโre coming down to gawk at you.โ
Sliding my sunglasses off, I pulled myself onto my elbows and glared up at the scrawny little shit. โDonโt call me a dickhead, dickhead.โ
โAoife, come on,โ he said, gesturing to where I was sprawled out. โCanโt you do that inside?โ
โCanโt I sunbathe inside? Why no, Kevin, sorry but I canโt. Thatโs not how sunbathing works,โ I deadpanned, readjusting the strap of my yellow bikini top.
โThen cover yourself up.โ
โThatโs not how sunbathing works either, Kev.โ
โAoife,โ he groaned, tone whiny now. โCome on, youโre embarrassing me. Just go inside or put some clothes on.โ
โHow many days of sunshine do we get in Ireland, Kev?โ I asked my half-twin.
Yeah, we might have shared a womb for nine months, but that was all we had in common. The truth was that we couldnโt have been any different from each other.
โThe answer is not enough,โ I told him. โNot enough by half. Besides, Dadโs upstairs, putting a new bathroom in with Joey, and Iโve already been banished.โ
โYeah, I saw he brought him over again,โ my brother grumbled. โHe could have asked me to help him with the bathroom.โ
โHa,โ I laughed. โLike you know the first thing about manual labor.โ
โHe could show me,โ Kev snapped in a defensive tone. โIโm a faster learner than that thick fucker upstairs.โ
โDonโt call him thick,โ I warned, hackles rising. โHeโs more world wise than youโll ever be.โ
Kev rolled his eyes. โOh yeah, because knowing where to score drugs takes a real genius.โ
โSo, he smokes weed occasionally,โ I heard myself defend. โBig deal, Kev. So do a lot of other people in our year. It doesnโt make him a bad person.โ
โIt doesnโt make him a good one either,โ he shot back. โWhy are you always defending him?โ
โBecause heโs my friend, Kevin.โ
โYeah? Well, your friend does a lot more than smoke weed.โ
โLike youโd know.โ
โIย would, actually,โ he replied. โIโm in his year, too, remember. I know what goes on just as well as you do.โ
โYeah, in the swot class,โ I snorted. โAndย sureย you do, Kev. Youโre right in there with the big guns, arenโt ya? Mister popularity himself.โ
โYou think your looks and popularity are going to get you far in life?โ he laughed. โYouโre so stupid that itโs pitiful.โ
โLook at you, getting all riled up and catty.โ I grinned. โNo need to pity me, dear brother, because Iโm doing just fine for myself.โ
โNo, Aoife,ย Iโmย doing fine.ย Iโmย the one going places. The only way youโre getting out of this council estate is if you marry up,โ he sneered. โBecause you sure as shit wonโt make it on your own. So, you might want to hold onto Paul Rice, because heโs looking like your best shot.โ
โOh, whatever, you dick.โ
โItโs the truth.โ
โKeep talking shit to me and I just might have to take my top off and give those gamer buddies of yours a real special show.โ
He narrowed his eyes. โYou wouldnโt dare.โ
โTry me.โ Narrowing my eyes right back at him, I reached for the string behind my neck and said, โIโm told I have perky nipples.โ
โYouโre such a bitch,โ he spat before storming back to the house.
โTakes one to know one, you little pussy,โ I called after him and then sighed in contentment, thrilled to have gotten the better of him. โGood one, huh?โ I cooed, tickling Spud on his belly. โYeah, I know you think heโs a dope, too. I donโt need a boy, do I? No, I donโt. Iโll make my own way in life.โ
โAoife Christina Molloy!โ my mother called out a few minutes later. Pushing the kitchen window open, she leaned out and shook a wooden spoon at me. โGet into the house and cover yourself up before I come out there and drag you inside.โ
โAre you serious?โ I growled, giving Spud one final belly rub, before reluctantly climbing to my feet. โHeย toldย on me?โ
โThere are teenage boys in this house, Aoife,โ Mam shot back. โAnd youโre sprawled out in the garden like Pamela fecking Anderson herself. Do you want to be the cause of giving them a turn?โ
โI know how old they are, Mam. Most of them are in my year at school.โ I laughed. โAnd youโre afraid Iโll give them a turn? More like a horn โโ
โDonโt you dare finish that sentence,โ Mam warned, still waving around the wooden spoon like a demented housewife.
โYeah, well, Dad told me to stay out of his way,โ I shot back. โSo, guess what Iโm doing?โ
โEnough of the cheek, young lady. Inside right now, or youโre grounded for the rest of the month. And that also includes having friends over. No phone, either. And noโโ
โJesus, fine,โ I huffed, stalking to the back door. โRelax, would you. Itโs not that serious.โ
โThank you,โ Mam said when I stomped into the kitchen. โNow, go upstairs and throw on some clothes, like a good girl, before your brother has a conniption fit.โ
โIs it okay if I get a drink before Iโm exiled from the family home for possessing a pair of boobs?โ I asked sulkily, as I reached into the fridge and grabbed a carton of orange juice. โOr is rehydrating a crime now, too?โ
โDrama queen.โ Rolling her eyes, Mam smirked and turned back to her ironing. โPour me a glass, too.โ
Grabbing two glasses out of the press, I poured a glass of orange juice and quickly gulped it down before refilling my glass and pouring one for Mam.
โThanks, love.โ
โYouโre not welcome,โ I teased, setting a glass down on the counter beside her.
โTrish, weโve the bathroom just about done, love. Iโm off to the dump with that old bath before they close,โ my father called from the front hall. โI wonโt be long.โ
โIโll see ya, Trish. Thanks for the sandwich.โ
โYouโre welcome, Joey, love.โ
Resisting the urge to rush out into the hallway and take one last look at Joey Lynch before he left with my dad, I held firm, and took another sip of orange juice instead.
โMake sure you take that old Lino with you, Tony,โ Mam called back, not bothering to look up from her ironing board. โAnd thereโs a few bags of rubbish at the side of the house that could do with being cleared out.โ
โAlready taken care of.โ
โGood man yourself.โ
โA little heads up that Joey was coming over wouldโve been nice,โ I said once as the front door closed behind them.
โAh, heโs a lovely boy, isnโt he? Such a hard little worker,โ Mam gushed, smiling into her ironing. โI thought youโd be delighted to see him. The two of you are great little friends at school, isnโt that right?โ
โYeah, weโre buds,โ I agreed, suppressing a laugh. โA headโs up wouldโve been nice, though.โ
โItโs a shame that he and your brother donโt seem to gel,โ Mam added with a sigh.
โThatโs not on Joey, Mam. Kev doesnโt gel with anyone,โ I snorted, resting my hip against the counter. โHeโs too stuck-up.โ
โAoife.โ
โWhat?โ I threw a hand up. โItโs true.โ
โIt would do your brother no harm to get off that computer and spend some time at the garage. Iโm sure if he gave it a chance, theyโd find some common ground.โ
โCommon ground with who? Dad or Joey? Because, no offense, Mam, but your darling baby boy thinks heโs above the both of them. Kev doesnโt have any intention of getting his hands dirty. He has too high of an opinion of himself to slum it with us normal folk.โ
โHe does not,โ she scolded. โDonโt be mean.โ
โSo, whatโs the story with the new bathroom?โ I decided to change the subject by asking, unwilling to give my dope of a brother another second of airtime.
โWhat do you mean?โ
โYou know what I mean, Mam.โ
โNothing, love.โ My mother, who looked a lot like what I presumed the forty-something-year-old version of me would look like, smiled brightly.ย Too brightly. โIt was just time for a change.โ
โMam,โ I sighed, reaching over to stroke her leg with my foot. โAre you okay?โ
I knew she wasnโt.
Her heart had been broken by my father for what had to be the fourth time in a matter of years โ that I was aware of.
โI will be,โ she replied, tone forcefully cheerful, as she tucked a blonde wisp of hair behind her ear. โIโm looking forward to a nice hot shower tonight.โ
โSo, who was it this time?โ I asked then, poking the bear. I didnโt really want to know, or at least, I shouldnโt want to know, but I asked her anyway because I was a glutton for punishment. Reaching into her pile of neatly folded ironing that was stacked on the kitchen table, I retrieved a t-shirt and pulled it on. โWas it a one-off, or was it going on for a while?โ
โI donโt want to talk about it, Aoife,โ Mam replied quietly. โAnd I donโt want you to think badly of him, either. Heโs a good man, deep down, and a wonderful father.โ
โYeah, he is a good father,โ I agreed, setting my empty glass in the sink. โBut heโs a shitty husband, Mam.โ
She, on the other hand, was a good wife, and a great mam, but that didnโt change the fact that her constant stream of forgiveness looked an awful lot like weakness in my eyes.
Sure, they seemed to have a decent relationship โ when Dad wasnโt letting his wandering eye get in the way. In a weird way, they were pretty stable, and never seemed to let any discourse in their marriage interfere with mine or Kevโs lives.
โHe makes a lot of mistakes,โ Mam agreed, handing me the denim shorts she had just finished ironing.
โToo many mistakes,โ I offered, stepping into my shorts and dragging them up my hips. โToo many times.โ
โI know you have your own thoughts and opinions on how I should react to this,โ she said evenly. โBut itโs a lot easier to know what to do when itโs another personโs life youโre judging.โ
โIt seems pretty black and white to me.โ
โThatโs because youโre young.โ She smiled. โThe whole world isnโt black and white, Aoife. Thereโs a whole lot of grey in the middle.โ
โI donโt understand,โ I admitted with a frustrated sigh. โI donโt get how you can stay with him when heโs proven that he canโt be trusted.โ I shook my head and pointed to her. โLook at how ridey you are, Mam.โ
โRidey?โ
โIt means desirable,โ I explained. โBeautiful, gorgeous, fuckable โโ
โOkay,โ Mam laughed softly. โThank you for compliment, but thatโs enough of the bad language.โ
โWell, itโs true. You are stunning, Mam,โ I pushed. โKev thinks his weirdo buddies are coming downstairs to see me, when half of the time itโs to sneak a peek at you.โ
โAoife,โ she chuckled.
Sighing, I asked, โWhy do you put up with it, Mam?โ
โI love him,โ she replied. โI have invested more than twenty years of my life into the man and had my children with him. And believe it or not, he loves me, too.โ
โThen maybe he needs to love you better,โ I told her. โBecause his words and his actions arenโt exactly aligning, Mam.โ
โNo marriage is perfect.โ
โNo,โ I agreed. โBut not all wives are cheated on, either.โ
โWhat about Paul?โ Mam asked, steering the conversation towards me, tone defensive. โYou love him, donโt you? Imagine having spent most of your life raising a family together and then having toโโ
โNo.โ
Mam blinked in surprise. โNo?โ
โNo,โ I confirmed, with a shake of my head. โI donโt love Paul, and I have no plans on that status changing.โ
โWhy not?โ
โBecause I have no intention of giving a boy that kind of power over me,โ I replied simply. โFrom my viewpoint, men let you down โ even the good ones like dad canโt be trusted. So, why would I ever expose myself to that kind of pain? It would be emotional suicide.โ
Mam looked flabbergasted as she let out a small laugh. โAoife, if you donโt have feelings for the poor boy, then why in Godโs name have you been going out with him for the past year and a half?โ
โBecause Iย chooseย to,โ I explained. โNot because Iย needย to.โ
โAnd what about Paul?โ she demanded. โHave you spared a thought for his feelings?โ
โI never said I didnโt care about him, Mam, of course I care.โ Shrugging, I added, โIโm fond of him โ obviously. I just donโt have those crazy deep feelings that cloud common sense.โ
She arched a brow. โFond?โ
I shrugged. โWhatโs wrong with fond?โ
โFond isnโt a word a girl normally uses to describe her feelings towards her boyfriend.โ
โWell, thatโs all I have, Mam.โ
โBut โโ
โAnd if you think that Paul Rice is in love with me, then youโre wrong,โ I was quick to point out. โHis feelings are as replaceable to him as I am. If we broke up in the morning, I could guarantee you that it wouldnโt take him more than a week, two tops, to move on to someone else.โ
โAoife,โ Mam gasped.
โWhat? Itโs true.โ Laughing, I waved a hand idly in the air. โThatโs how fleeting boysโ feelings are โ and I donโt just mean Paul, either. Thatโs all boys. Sure, he might be pride-hurt, but he would forget about me pretty quickly.โ
โButโโ
โCome on, Mam, itโs like youโve just said; youโve been married to Dad for twenty years, and that hasnโt stopped him from forgetting about you every time he strays.โ
โSo, this way of thinking is because of our marriage?โ
โMaybe?โ I shrugged. โI donโt know.โ
โI hope not.โ
โBut even if it is, Iโm glad because it prepared me for the inevitable. Donโt catch feelings and you wonโt get hurt.โ I smiled. โSimple.โ
โSo, youโre saying that you never want to fall in love and get married?โ
โItโs not like Iโm one hundred million percent opposed to the idea of marriage and motherhood. If the right guy came along and proved me wrong, then sure, I could do it,โ I admitted. โBut I could never cope with the crap youโve had to deal with. I could never do that, Mam. And certainly not with your grace. If I loved a man, and I mean truly, madly, deeply loved him, then I could never handle knowing that he was with another woman. It would destroy me. I would go insane. I could never forgive that level of betrayal. Hence why taking that chance seems too risky to me. So yeah, Iโm probably going remain ring-free for the foreseeable forty plus years.โ
โSo, you wouldnโt care if say Paul went off with another girl?โ Mam questioned. โYou know, since you donโt love him and all?โ
โHonestly, Iโd probably be pissed off, but mostly relieved.โ
Mam gaped. โRelieved?โ
โYeah,โ I replied. โBecause he would have proven what Iโve known all along; that no man can be trusted.โ
โOh, I donโt know, Aoife, love,โ Mam said, worrying her lip. โThatโs an awfully cynical way of thinking.โ
โPractical.โ I winked. โItโs aย practicalย way of thinking โ and clearly the right way of thinking, considering the rumors Iโve heard.โ
Mam gave me a disconcerting look. โWhatย kindย of rumors?โ
I arched a brow and gave her aย what do you thinkย look.
โHeย cheatedย on you?โ she demanded, immediately catching my drift. โThen what are you doing with him?โ
โHa!โ I folded my arms across my chest. โPot, meet kettle.โ
She sighed heavily. โAoife, love, you donโt have to put up with that sort of thing.โ
โI know that I donโt,โ I agreed. โAnd donโt worry, Iโve confronted Paul about the rumors.โ
โAnd?โ
I shrugged. โHe says itโs all a pack of lies.โ
โBut you donโt believe him?โ
โWould you?โ
Mam gave me a sympathetic look.
โI donโt believe a single word that comes out of a single boyโs mouth,โ I told her.
Thatโs not technically true.
You believeย oneย boy.
โAnd how long have theseย rumorsย been circling?โ
Longer than I cared to admit to my mother. โA while.โ
โDo you know for sure that he hasnโt cheated on you?โ
โCan anyone know that for sure?โ
โNo, I suppose not.โ
โExactly.โ
โThen why would you stay with him, Aoife?โ
โWhy do you stay with Dad?โ
โThatโs not a fair comparison,โ she replied. โWeโre married.โ
โExactly,โ I agreed. โYouโreย married,ย committed,ย in love,ย investedย in one another, and itย stillย happens. He still fucks you overย repeatedly. So, if Iโve learned anything from you and Dad, itโs that no man, no matter how perfect he seems, can be trusted.โ
โYou shouldnโt be afraid to love a boy, Aoife.โ Sadness filled her voice as she spoke. โPlease donโt let our mistakes hold you back in life. It would break my heart to think that our relationship affected you to the point where you struggle to commit your heart to someone.โ
โIโm not afraid of loving a boy,โ I told her honestly. โIโm afraid of losing myself in one.โ
โI hate to tell you this, but more often than not, the two go hand in hand.โ
โI know.โย Thatโs what scares me.
โAoife.โ
โEnough of the heavy.โ Patting my motherโs shoulder, I gave her a bright smile before heading for the door. โIโm hot and sticky and in dire need of a shower.โ
โDonโt you dare use that shower before I do,โ Mam called after me. โI mean it, young lady, Iโm having the first go of it.โ
โUnderstood,โ I replied as I hurried up the staircase, with every intention of doing just that.
Whipping off my t-shirt, I snatched a towel out of the hot-press, and legged it into the bathroom, cackling mischievously to myself.
โI mean it, Aoife Molloy, donโt even think about it!โ
โI wonโt,โ I laughed, closing and locking the door shut before my mother could finish her threat.
Feeling smug, I stripped off the rest of my clothes and rubbed my hands together in gleeful anticipation, as I stepped into the fancy new shower and switched it on.
The motor roared to life, but nothing came out.
Not so much as a drop of water.
โWhat the hell?โ I growled, twisting and turning the knobs in front of me. โWork, dammit, work.โ
A knock sounded on the bathroom door then, and I blew out a frustrated breath.
Stomping over to my towel, I quickly wrapped it around my body, and unlocked the door before swinging it open. โI know what it looks like, but I swear I wasnโt going to use it before youโฆโ
My words trailed off when my eyes landed on Joey.
โYouโre back.โ
โIโm back.โ
โWell good.โ Tightening my hold on my towel, I gripped the door and tried to play it cool. โBecause youโve done a crappy job installing this shower. The stupid thing doesnโt even work.โ
โI know,โ he replied, as he stepped around me and walked over the toilet. โThatโs why Iโm back.โ Crouching down in front of the toilet, he reached behind the cistern. โForgot to switch the stopcock back on.โ
โThe stopcock?โ I laughed. โWhat the hell is that?โ
Twisting the knob on a valve, Joey reached up and flushed the toilet and then hovered over the bowl, watching the water circle. Seemingly satisfied with that, Joey stood up and walked over to the shower and switched it on. This time, when the motor roared to life, it was accompanied by a steady spray of water coming from the jets. โTa-da.โ
โYay!!โ I clapped in delight. โMy hero.โ
โEasy to please you, Molloy.โ
โThatโs impressive, Joe.โ
He snorted. โI turned the water back on.โ
โI wouldnโt have known how to do that.โ
He shrugged and moved for the sink, turning on the tap to wash his hands. โWell, enjoy your shower.โ
โOh, donโt worry, I plan to. Thanks again, Joe.โ
โAnytime.โ
Switching the tap off, he looked around for a towel, and when he couldnโt find one, he walked over to where I was standing and dried his hands on the bottom of my towel.
โHey,โ I growled, slapping at his hands. โRude.โ
โNice towel,โ he shot back with a cheeky wink before moving for the door. โIโll be seeing ya, Molloy.โ
โHold up.โ My heart pounded loudly in my chest as I followed him to the door, slipping around him to press my back to the wood.ย And keep him for a little bit longer.ย โAre you going to your match now?โ
He didnโt look happy when he said, โThatโs the plan.โ
โDo you even want to play?โ
My question seemed to throw him because his furrowed his brow in confusion. โWhy would you even ask that?โ
โBecause you never look happy on the pitch,โ I replied, readjusting my hold on my towel. Looking up at his face, I offered him a sad smile. โYou never look happy anywhere.โ
โAnd youโd know all about that, wouldnโt you?โ he was quick to counter, immediately on the defense, as his walls shot up around him. โWatching everything I do like a fucking stalker.โ
โLower the gun, Joe.โ Knowing every one of his tricks, I kept my tone even when I said, โIโm not the enemy.โ
Joey glowered at me for a long moment before the hostility in his eyes eventually gave way to resignation. โI know.โ Blinking, he released a harsh breath and shook his head. โI know, Molloy.โ
โI know you do,โ I replied, reaching up to rub the prickly fuckerโs shoulder. โItโs okay. I forgive you.โ
Heat blazed in his dark eyes when he snapped, โIโm not sorry.โ
Yes, he was.
โI know.โ Reaching up, I ruffled his blond hair and grinned. โI still forgive you.โ
Unable to conceal his discomfort, or his agitated state in general, he ran a hand through his hair and gestured to where I was standing. โCan you move aside so I can leave? Iโm going to be late for the match.โ
โIโll move aside,โ I told him. โIf you promise to wait for me.โ
He frowned. โWait for you?โ
โYeah.โ I smiled. โIโm coming with you.โ
โComing with me?โ Another frown. โWhere?โ
โYouโre going to the GAA pitch. Iโm going to the GAA pitch. We can keep each other company on the walk.โ
โNo.โ
โYes.โ
โYouโre not coming with me.โ
โOh, yes I am.โ
Joey stared at me in horror, walls shooting back up at a rapid rate. โIn what alternative universe did I give you the impression that I would want you to come with me?โ
โHow about the universe where you quit pretending that my mere presence irritates you and admit that you adore the ground I walk on.โ
His mouth fell open. โI do not.โ
โYou do, too.โ Smiling up at him, I patted his shoulder. โFriend.โ
โIโm not yourโโ
โDonโt even think about finishing that sentence.โ
Swiftly clamping his mouth shut, he swallowed. He stared at me for the longest time before growling, โYou have five minutes and then Iโm leaving.โ
Grinning in victory, I patted his chest before stepping aside and moving for the shower. โIโll be ready in twenty minutes.โ
โTen,โ he bit out, swinging the bathroom door open. โOr Iโm leaving without you.โ
โTwenty,โ I called over my shoulder as I dropped my towel and climbed into the shower. โYou can wait in my room.โ
The bathroom door slammed behind him, and then I heard him say, โFifteen and thatโs final.โ
โTwenty,โ I crooned, thoroughly enjoying his agitation.
โYouโre a pain in my hole.โ
I laughed.