Iโve only been on the boat for half an hour, but my stomach is already threatening to empty itself all over the floorboards of my room. Or possibly Corrickโs room. He can decide when he arrives. Weโre not even at sea yet, but Iโm ready to tear apart my apothecary kit, because I could chew through an entire twist of ginger root. I definitely wish Iโd waited for Corrick on the docks. It might have been raining, but at least it wasย stable. I press my hands to my abdomen and wonder whatโs keeping him. I saw the flicker of worry in Captain Blakemoreโs eyes when he looked at the sky.
Rapid footsteps cross the floorboards overhead,
stepping with purpose. I try not to wonder if the storm is worse than they expected, if weโre too late to leave safely. A large porthole sits on the opposite side of the room, heavy glass crossed by steel bars, and rain has been steadily beating at the window since I walked in. Iโve been trying not to look through it because all I can see are the gas lamps on the dock shifting up and down.
When Captain Blakemore showed me to this room, he said, โWeโve given you all the rear quarters since youโre not used to being at sea. The going should be a bit smoother
here.โ He then pointed at the ceiling and said something about the officersโ stations and navigational rooms being above us, but by that point, I was trying to keep from stumbling into him again.
Itโs bad enough that it happened once.
I wonder if Kilbourne will say something to Corrick. I remember the flare of intrigue in the captainโs eyes when he asked if I would be sharing quarters with the prince. It feels like the kind of detail a guardsman wouldnโt leave unremarked.
A knock raps at the door, and Kilbourne calls, โMiss Tessa. An audience has beenโโ
My heart leaps. Oh thank goodness. Heโs here. I donโt even wait for Kilbourne to finish his announcement before I stride to the door and throw it open.
I stop short. Itโs not Corrick. Itโs Lochlan. His eyes are hard and his jaw is set.
My heartโs leap turns into a stumble.
I havenโt seen Lochlan since he caused a scene in the candy shop, and I was doubtful when I learned heโd be on this journey. A willowy young man in palace livery stands behind him, but itโs very obvious that heโs been charged with keeping Lochlan out of trouble. He looks more like a student than a guard.
He also looks just as green as I feel.
Lochlan doesnโt waste time on any pleasantries. He pulls a small woven pouch out of a pocket and holds it out. โHere,โ he says, and while his voice is gruff, itโs not unkind.
โWhat is it?โ
โItโs from Karri. For the seasickness.โ He gives me a quick up-and-down glance. โPeppermint candies. And some ginger caramels. She made them both this morning when she learned we were leaving so soon.โ He pauses. โYou look like you could use some.โ
โOh.โ That tempers some of my wariness. I reach out and take the bag just as the boat gives another surge. I have to grab hold of the doorframe so I donโt crash into Lochlan, too.
My mouth is already watering, and I shove a hand into the bag for one of the caramels. โThank you,โ I say, as I slip one into my mouth. โDonโt you need them?โ
โShe made some for me, too,โ he says. โBut I always catch some summer work on the fishing trawlers. I donโt get seasick.โ He glances at my hand clutching the wood. โItโll be better once we pull away from the dock. Theyโve got the sails up, so weโre fighting the ropes.โ
Thereโs no belligerence in his voice, and Iโm reminded of the way he spoke gently to Karri. Iโve only ever known him as a rebel who tortured Corrick and tried to burn down the palace, but there has to be another side to him that heโs reluctant to show. Karri is too smart, too discerning. She wouldnโt be with a man like him otherwise.
โBe careful,โ I say. โYou might trick me into thinking youโre kind, Lochlan.โ
โI am kind,โ he says simply. The boat sways, and he compensates, then throws a glare at the ceiling. โFigures weโd be made to wait on that stupid, spoiledโโ
โI suggest you not finish that sentence,โ says Kilbourne, and all the warmth that existed in his tone earlier is gone now.
โWhat are you going to do?โ says Lochlan. โThrow me overboard? Donโt think I donโt know why I wasย invited.โ
โYou were invited as an extension ofย trust,โ I say.
Surprise lights in his expression, and he gives a brief, derisive laugh. Any flickers of kindness have vanished. โThe sad thing is that you really believe that. Karri loves you, so Iโm going to have to assume youโre just naive, because anything else would be insulting.โ
โOh, good,โ I say. โIโm glad youโre not going to get
insulting.โ
He takes a looming step toward me, and my heart thumps.
He must see the fear in my expression because he stops. โAgain,โ he says, โyouโre scared ofย me, when you should be scared ofย him. You probably think he brought you for some reason other than keeping him warm at night.โ My cheeks flame, but heโs not done. โSomehow youโre smart enough to make the Moonflower work better, but youโre too stupid to figure out that the Kingโs Justice is a dirty liar who should be chained to the rudderโโ
Kilbourne shoves him into the opposite wall so hard that the doors rattle. The movement is so quick and so violent that I give a little yip and press my hands to my abdomen. He might be good-natured, but heโs still a guardsman. Even Silas looks startled, but he catches up more quickly than I do. He puts a hand against Lochlanโs shoulder to pin him there, then glances at Kilbourne as if to ask if theyโre taking it further.
Lochlan doesnโt fight him; he just looks at me. โDo you see?โ
โI gave you fair warning,โ Kilbourne says.
Footsteps echo from the opposite direction, and I turn to see Captain Blakemore approaching, followed by Corrick and Rocco.
The captainโs steps slow as he sizes up the situation. The hallway is narrow, but he waits for Corrick to draw abreast. โYour Highness. Are your people going to be a problem?โ
Corrickโs eyes flick from me to Lochlan. โIt doesnโt look like my people were the onesย causingย the problem. Silas, see that he returns to his quarters.โ
Lochlan draws himself up like heโs going to retort, but then he lets out a breath and shakes his head. He looks at me. โJust wait. Youโll see.โ He pauses, then throws a look of pure hatred Corrickโs way. โAnd when it happens,โ he says to me, โbe sure to tell Karri I loved her.โ Then he shoves past the prince and the captain and slips into a room just a bit down the hall.
Corrick looks at me. His hair is damp, his clothes shining where rain soaked into the shoulders of his jacket. His eyes, as usual, are piercing. โDid he hurt you?โ
โNo,โ I say. I realize my fingers are still clutched around the candies that Karri sent. โHe wasnโt doing anything wrong.โ As I say the words, I canโt decide if theyโre true. Too much happened in a short span of time. โHe brought me medicine from Karri.โ
โAre you unwell, Miss Cade?โ says Captain Blakemore. โI just need to get used to the motion of the boat,โ I say.
Thereโs too much tension in the hallway, and I want to undo it. I just have no idea how. โCorrick, I โฆ I didnโt know which room youโd want.โ
โAny room will do,โ he says. His eyes havenโt left mine. โCaptain, you have my thanks.โ Then, without hesitation, he takes my hand, leads me into the room at my back, and closes us inside.
Before I learned the truth about Weston Lark, I never saw the prince up closeโif I ever saw him at all. But the few times Iย didย see Prince Corrick, I remember that he always looked distant and aloof, his eyes cold and unforgiving. The perfect Kingโs Justice. The perfect executioner.
The night he caught me sneaking into the palace was the first time I knew him for who he truly was, and Iโll
never forget the look of panic and fear and uncertainty that was etched into his features for one brief second, before going cold and hard and unreadable, the truest mask he ever wears.
Those are the same eyes looking at me right now. โAre you sure?โ he says to me, and thereโs a demand in his tone, a demand backed by concern. โI saw the guard shove him away. You werenโt hurt?โ
โNo,โ I say. โHe didnโt hurt me. He was just โฆ just mouthing off. Kilbourne shouldnโt have hit him.โ The first small caramel has dissolved, and my stomach already feels better. I take one of the peppermints next.
Corrick watches my action, but he says nothing. I wish I could read his expression.
I hold out the bag. โWould you like one?โ
He hesitates, then shakes his head. โNo. Thank you.โ
The cabin is dim, lit only by an oil lantern hung suspended along the wall. Itโs light enough for me to see his tension, the tight set of his shoulders.
I should have waited on the dock.
After a moment, this candy settles my stomach enough for me to take a deep breath, and maybe that eases the tension in the room, because Corrick sighs, too. He runs a hand back through his damp hair, then begins roughly jerking at the buttons of his jacket. Once itโs loose, he shrugs free to toss it over the back of a chair.
โSo youโd like this room?โ I say to him. His eyes snap to mine. โWhat?โ
โCaptain Blakemore asked me which room Iโd like, and I told him I ought to wait for you to choose yours first.โ
His eyes narrow the tiniest bit. โDid he.โ
Much like his eyes, I canโt read his voice at all. โYouโre the Kingโs Justice. I only thought it appropriateโโ
โLord, Tessa. I donโt care which room I have.โ
Heโs so uneasy. The worst part is that I donโt know what worries him the most. Leaving his brother? Going to Ostriary? Lochlan? Captain Blakemore?
The ship sways, and my stomach dips, and once again, I stumble. Corrick lightly catches my waist.
โWe must be shoving off,โ he says.
โWhy is everyone else so sure-footed?โ I say, aggrieved. โOh, Iโm not,โ he says. โI grabbed hold of you for
balance.โ
Heโs teasing, but his voice is too grave for it to be funny. I swat him on the arm anyway, and he half smiles, but he doesnโt let go of me. A hand lifts to stroke a stray lock of hair back from my cheek.
โIโm so glad youโre here,โ he says softly. In his tone, I hear a dozen things unsaid: his longing, his hope โฆ his fear. It reminds me of that moment with Harristan in my quarters.
Corrick quietly adds, โHarristan snuck into my carriage for the drive here.โ
My eyebrows go up. โHe did?โ Corrick nods.
I want to be surprised, but โฆ Iโm really not. Iโm touched. One of my favorite things about the brothers is their endearing closeness. I wish they would allow others to see it. Itโs the most humanizing thing about them.
โHe confronted Captain Blakemore and demanded my safe return,โ Corrick says. โI thought the guards might have a fit.โ
That makes me smile, but itโs fleeting, because I can hear the worry in his voice. โHarristan is afraid.โ
I expect Corrick to say something bold, like,ย The king fears nothing.
He doesnโt. โWe all are, Tessa.โ
I want to touch him, but I hesitate, because Iโm so used to guarding my emotions when Iโm with him in public. But weโre alone. Weโre out of the palace. What heโs riskingโ what theyโreย bothย riskingโis profound. I wonder what the king said to him before watching his brother climb onto a ship to an unknown country. I wonder if I can ask.
Maybe I donโt have to. The emotion is right there in his gaze.
I reach out and put a hand to his cheek.
He takes a breath, then closes his eyes. His hands are still on my waist, but heโs not steadying me anymoreโheโsย holdingย me, which is altogether different. Something about it reminds me of our days in the workshop, when we were listening to the sector alarms blare and we were worried about the night patrol.
I sigh and lean into his strength. โIโm glad youโre here, too.โ
His eyes open to find mine, and his hands shift, his thumbs skirting along my abdomen. Itโs such a tiny movement, but my heart kicks.
Iโm not sure if I make a sound or take a breath or if thereโs just a spark in the air, but Corrickโs blue eyes seem to darken a shade, and then his mouth is on mine.
At first heโs slow, controlled, gauging my response. After weeks of chaste walks and courtly manners and light kisses at sundown, I nearly melt right into his arms. When I yield to his touch, he grows more sure, his lips chasing mine, and I feel the bare edge of his teeth, then the brush of his tongue. He tastes like peppermintโor maybeย Iย taste like peppermint, sharp and sweet. He pulls me closer, until Iโm all but flush against him, and a bolt of warmth shoots through my belly. The only time heโs ever kissed me like this was in the Wilds. In the workshop. He keeps so much
of himself hidden that I somehow forgot he could be like this, all wildfire attraction and unbound passion.
His hand shifts higher, growing more daring, until his thumb brushes across the bodice of my dress, lighting a fire in my belly and stealing every clear thought from my head. I shiver and make a tiny sound, and thatโs all the encouragement he needs to tug the laces a bit looser. His mouth finds my neck, and his fingers slip past the laces of my bodice to trace the swell of skin.
I inhale sharply. โOh,โ I whisper, because I canโt think of any other words. Iโm sure someone will be knocking at the door for the prince at any moment, but right now, I donโt care. Butterflies scatter in my abdomen. โOh.โ
He smiles at my reaction, lifting his head to kiss me again. His arm snakes around my back to pull me even closer, and this time weโre clutched so tightly that I can feelย everything. The boat sways again, and I press against him, and itโsย hisย turn to make a low sound in his throat.
โIโve wanted to be alone with you for so long,โ he says, and thereโs no disguising the intense longing in his voice. I donโt know if he means the time weโve been together in the palace, where watching eyes and listening ears were everywhere, or if he means the time we spent together in the Wilds as Wes and Tessa, when he was so afraid of discovery that heโd never let me catch a glimpse of him without his mask.
Either way, it doesnโt matter. He kisses me again, his fingers slipping under my corset in a way that makes me whimper into his mouth.
โHush,โ he whispers, and a wicked light sparks in his eyes like weโre co-conspirators. โWe shouldnโt give Rocco and Kilbourneย tooย much to think about.โ
My cheeks burn fiercelyโbut my thoughts have stalled on his comment, tempering some of my flames. A part of
me doesnโt want him to stop. I crave the strength of his hands and the warmth of his mouth. I want him to keep going until every last stitch of fabric is on the floor.
But another part of me knows heโs only being so free because weย areย out of the palace, where Prince Corrick would never be caught bedding a โฆ a commoner.
We shouldnโt give Rocco and Kilbourne too much to think about.
The words seem to have a lot of different meanings, and Iโm sure he means to protect me from the listening ears of the guards.
But just now, on the tail of Lochlanโs comments about Corrickโs reasons for bringing me along, itโs enough to chase all my warmth away. Because thereโs a part of that sentence that sounds like heโs protectingย himself.
Corrick notices immediately, because heโs drawn back to look at me. โTessa?โ
โIโjustโwe shouldโโ Iโm choking on my words because my thoughtsโto say nothing of myย bodyโwerenโt ready for such an abrupt change in direction. I have to take a deep breath to steady myself. I tug at the laces of my corset, pulling it tight again. โYouโre right. We shouldnโt give the guards reasons to gossip.โ My cheeks feel hot, and I already know Iโm going to have trouble looking Rocco in the eyes. โWeโve been in here too long. Surely itโs inappropriateโโ
โTessa.โ His hands fall on mine, forcing them still.
For a moment, I let him. My eyes are on the collar of his shirt, on the smooth column of his neck. His fingers are warm against my own.
He ducks his head, his eyes seeking mine. โTalk to me,โ he says. Quietly. Gently. No command in his tone.
I pull my hands free and fuss with the laces, dodging his gaze. I donโt know what to say. My emotions are all tied up
in knots, my stomach churning again. This time, it has nothing to do with the rocking of the ship. All my thoughts are crashing into each other, and I hateโhateโthat Lochlan put these doubts in my mind.
But now they exist, and they cling to the inside of my head and refuse to let go.
โLochlan thinks you brought him along just so you can make sure he falls overboard,โ I say. โPlease tell me thatโs not true.โ
Corrick blinks and draws back. It takes him a moment to answer. โI wouldnโt shed a tear if it happened. That shouldnโt be a surprise.โ
Itโsย notย a surprise. But itโs also not the answer I want to hear. โIs that why you brought him? Are you and Harristan getting rid of him?โ
I donโt know whatโs making me demand answers onย this, of all things. Thereโs no love lost between me and Lochlan either. But despite all his promises, I know everything Corrick has done. The Kingโs Justice was feared throughout Kandala for a reason.
And maybe the thought of asking questions aboutย myself
is too frightening to bear.
Corrickโs eyes have locked down so quickly that itโs like Iโve been thrust into a room with a stranger. โI could have put a rope around his neck on the docks, Tessa.โ His voice is cold and flat when he says it. โI couldโve had the guards put an arrow in his chest in that candy shop. I could have had him chained to a post and set on fire during theโโ
โStop it!โ I say sharply. โStop!โ
โAs Iโve said in the past, I bring nightmares to life. If I wanted him dead, I didnโt need to drag him aboard a ship. Trust me, Iโd rather have another guard with us.โ
My heart keeps clipping along, and Iโm completely flushed for an entirely different reason from five minutes
ago. I donโt know how he can shut down his emotions so quickly. Right now, itโs a talent I wish I shared. โAny of those things would have been public,โ I say. โOn a ship, you could claim heย fell, or that he was killedโโ
โDo you mean to accuse me of something?โ
His voice is low and dangerous, and for a brief second, I remember Captain Blakemoreโs voice on the dock when he worried that he might be putting me at risk.
I hate the path all my thoughts have chosen to follow. I have to swallow and square my shoulders, and I knot my corset tightly. โNo,โ I say. โI hope you find this cabin acceptable. Iโll โฆ Iโll retire to my own.โ I turn for the door.
Corrick catches my arm, and I gasp, expecting him to grab me, but he doesnโt. His fingers are gentle, which shouldnโt be startling, but itย is. When he hears my indrawn breath, he lets me go instantly. Something fractures in his gaze. โTessa. Please. Stop. Tell me what just happened.โ
โYou said youโve waited so long.โ He frowns, but he nods.
โIย didnโt make you wait,โ I say.
Heโs frozen in place for the longest time, his jaw tight as he regards me. Heโs the brother to the king. He canโt make promises or declarations. Iย knowย he canโt.
My cheeks are hot again, but I hold his gaze. โI donโt deserve to be treated like a secret, Corrick.โ
A muscle in his jaw twitches. I wish he would say something. I wish he wouldย doย something.
โForgive me,โ he finally says, and his voice is as proper and courtly as Iโve ever heard it. โThat wasnโt my intent.โ
I know, I want to say, but I donโt know. Just like with the man in the candy shop, or with Lochlanโs presence on this ship, Iย donโtย know. Not for sure.
So I curtsy just as formally, as if I werenโt just drowning in the taste of his mouth. โThank you, Your Highness.โ
That hits him like a dart. I can almost see the impact. He takes a step back and gives me a nod. โI bid you a pleasant evening, Miss Cade.โ
That hitsย meย like a dagger. My throat swells and my eyes blur, and I have to turn on my heel and stride for the door.
Just as I open it, I hear his voice, soft and beseeching. โTessa.โ
But the door is already open, Rocco and Kilbourne both standing at attention in the hall.
I donโt look at either of them. I allow the door to fall closed behind me, and I step across the corridor to close myself alone in the last remaining room.