After scrubbing myself half raw in what had to be the fastest shower known to mankind, I tore my wardrobe apart trying to find something other than a jersey and hoodie to wear. Jesus Christ, my heart hadn’t stopped racing since I received that text from Shannon earlier this evening.

S: You can pick me up instead. I’m at Claire’s house. I’ll be waiting for you. Xx

I had no fucking idea what was happening here, and I cared even less, because the concept of spending time with my girlfriend outside of school had my head in a spin. All week, I had to make do with seeing her in the halls and a few scanty minutes at lunch, but now? Now I got to have her to myself for a night. Thanking Jesus that today was the day my mother had decided to relinquish the keys of my car back to me, I whizzed around my bedroom with a toothbrush hanging out of my mouth and paste dripping down my chin, trying to find something respectable to wear.

Was this a date?

Did she want me to take her out?

Should I?

What the fuck was I going to do?

What about a condom?

Should I?

No!

Stop it!

Don’t even tempt yourself.

Fuck…

‘You look very handsome,’ Mam announced when I walked into the kitchen five minutes later to grab my keys and wallet.

‘Indeed.’ Gibsie, who was perched on a stool at the island, snickered loudly. ‘Very handsome, Jonathon.’

I shot him a look that said don’t you fucking dare open your mouth, regretting not dropping him straight home after the gym. I should have, but I’d been so thrown off kilter that I took the big eejit home with me. I also told him about my plans, which was a rookie mistake, one I only made because, again, I had been thrown by that text. To be fair, I felt like I owed him an explanation for almost decapitating him at the gym earlier when I stopped spotting him to text Shannon back.

Gibsie smirked and gestured that his lips were sealed.

That would be a first.

‘I look the same as always, Ma,’ I grumbled, knowing I needed to get in and out of this room before the woman gave me the mothering version of the Spanish Inquisition. ‘I’ll be home late tonight,’ I added in as breezy a tone as I could muster, slipping my wallet and keys into my back pocket. ‘So, don’t be panicking, okay?’ Or blowing up my bleeding phone.

‘Is that a new shirt?’ Mam, ignoring my statement, asked as her gaze traveled over my body.

Ugh.

Too fucking late…

‘No.’ Self-conscious, I pulled at the black fabric currently welded to my chest and shrugged. ‘It was in my wardrobe.’

Mam smirked. ‘And new aftershave?’

‘It’s the bottle I got at Christmas.’ I shifted uncomfortably. ‘Why?’

‘Oh, no reason, love,’ she replied with a knowing smirk. ‘Did you get your hair cut today?’

‘Yes,’ I bit out impatiently, feeling on full display. ‘I stopped off at the barbers after the gym and got a haircut.’

Her eyes sparkled with mischief. ‘Did you gel it, too?’

‘Jesus Christ, Ma,’ I muttered, patting my hair. ‘So what if I did?’

‘You’ve made such an effort with your appearance,’ she mused, arching a brow. ‘You must be going somewhere special tonight.’

‘With someone very special,’ Gibsie, the fucking turncoat, threw petrol on the fire by adding.

‘You got a haircut, too,’ I reminded him.

‘True, but I’m not the one with a date.’

I glared at Gibsie.

He raised his hands and grinned sheepishly.

‘Oh, love, take off your pants,’ Mam said then, dragging my attention back to her. ‘There’s a crease down the front of your jeans.’ Hopping down from her stool, she moved for the ironing board. ‘Whip them off and I’ll run the iron over them.’

‘What?’ I gaped at her. ‘It’s grand, Ma. I have to go.’

‘Jeans off,’ she ordered sharply, plugging in the iron. ‘No child of mine is going outside the front door in creased clothes.’

‘Jesus Christ.’ Muttering out a string of curse words, I kicked off my boots and dropped my jeans. ‘I need to go,’ I muttered, as I stepped out of my jeans and handed them to her. ‘Like, right now, Ma.’

‘You look good,’ Gibsie stated, tone serious, as he eyed the scar trailing down my thigh. The other one was thankfully concealed by my jocks. ‘It’s really clearing up.’

‘Thanks?’ I replied, giving him a WTF look as I shifted from foot to foot, waiting for my jeans. ‘Can you hurry it up, Ma?’ I begged. ‘I need to go.’

‘Are you taking Shannon to the pictures, love?’ Mam asked, smiling knowingly.

‘It’s called the cinema, Ma,’ I growled, rubbing a hand over my jaw. ‘No one – and I mean no bleeding one – calls it the pictures anymore.’

‘I do,’ Mam chirped back happily. ‘So, is that where you’re taking her?’

‘I don’t know yet,’ I muttered. ‘I was going to let her decide.’

‘Ah, that’s lovely, that is.’ Turning to Gibs, Mam smiled. ‘Isn’t that lovely, Gerard?’

‘It sure is.’ Gibsie snickered.

‘You should be taking that young one to the pictures,’ Mam added. ‘What’s her name – the Biggs girl.’

Gibsie reddened and I smirked.

Ha fucking ha.

‘Claire,’ he said, clearing his throat.

‘Ah, yes, Hughie’s sister.’ Mam smiled to herself as she ran the iron over my jeans. ‘You’ve been chasing after that girl since the day Johnny brought you home here, looking like a little blond, chubby cherub.’

I snorted, and it was Gibsie’s turn to glare at me.

‘You were such a gorgeous little boy.’ Setting the iron down, Mam picked up my jeans and shook them out, inspecting her work, before thankfully handing them back to me. ‘Do you remember the summer back in primary school when you all camped out in the acre? You fell into that bush of nettles trying to lift her over the electric fencer because she was afraid of the neighbor’s bull?’ Mam laughed softly to herself. ‘You were all stung and nettled but you still managed to get her out of that field.’

‘Oh yeah,’ Gibsie chuckled, scratching his chin. ‘I forgot about that.’

‘I said it to Sadhbh and Sinead back then that they would have to keep an eye on the pair of you,’ Mam mused. ‘ You were supposed to be Hughie’s friend, but you and that young-one were always inseparable. Joined at the hip with that little girl, you were.’

‘Well, thanks for the walk down memory lane, Ma,’ I said impatiently as I yanked my jeans back on and slipped on my boots. ‘But we have to go.’ Placing my hands on Gibsie’s shoulders, I steered him towards the back door. ‘Night.’

‘Johnny, be good,’ Mam called after me.

‘That’s a song,’ I called over my shoulder.

‘And a warning,’ she shot back. ‘Keep it in your pants.’

Jesus.

Fifteen minutes later, I had dropped Gibsie off and was parked outside the Biggs house with sweaty palms and a solid semi in my jeans. Jesus Christ, the anticipation of just seeing Shannon was driving me half demented. Excitement and nervousness thrummed in my veins, making me feel all fucked-up, but that’s what she brought out in me. Closing my eyes, I breathed deep and slow for several moments, wrangling my emotions into submission before attempting to get out.

When I felt slightly calmer, I climbed out and walked up the driveway, fighting an internal battle on what the fuck I was supposed to do when I reached the front door. Did I knock? Did I just walk in like I usually did? Jesus, I didn’t know. I had no fucking clue what I was doing.

Thankfully, the front door opened inwards when I was halfway up the garden path and Shannon was physically shoved outside by two blondes before the door slammed shut behind her.

Holy fuck.

My feet faltered as my eyes drank her in. She was wearing a tiny, red dress, with a black, leather jacket, and matching black heels that made her legs look like they went on for days. Her hair was pulled back in a pony-tail and flowing down her right shoulder, and her face? Jesus Christ, her lips…her eyes… fuck, I was in so much trouble.

Clasping a carrier bag in front of her, she smiled shyly. ‘Hi, Johnny.’

Giving my head a little shake, I closed the space between us and pressed a kiss to her cheek. ‘Hi, Shannon,’ I said gruffly. ‘You look beautiful.’

‘How was the gym?’ she asked, smiling up at me. ‘Were you careful?’

I could hardly make out a word of what she had just said because my entire focus was trained on her swollen lips that were puffy and red and making me think the most depraved thoughts.

Get it together, asshole.

‘Yeah,’ I choked out and then roughly cleared my throat. ‘It was good.’ Taking her hand in mine, I led her down the path to my car. ‘You look so fucking beautiful.’ You said that already, lad. ‘Seriously, you’re gorgeous.’ Shut up, Johnny.

‘Uh, thanks.’ Under the street lamps, I could see the blush on her cheeks. ‘It’s the clothes and makeup.’

‘It’s the girl,’ I corrected, giving her hand a squeeze.

Shannon ducked her face and I bit the inside of my cheek.

‘Hey – you got your car back?’ she said then, eyes wide. ‘That’s great.’

‘Yeah.’ Nodding, I opened the passenger door and gestured for her to get in. ‘I just got it back this morning.’ Shannon climbed in and I closed her door before rounding the car. ‘So, how’d you get out?’ I asked, sinking into the driver’s seat. ‘With Darren on patrol?’

Shannon grimaced as she fastened her seatbelt. ‘We had a fight and he stormed off. Mam was in bed so I sort of just…walked out.’ She shrugged. ‘He hasn’t called since so I guess he hasn’t gone home yet, either.’

Fucking asshole.

‘Well, I’m glad you’re out,’ I told her, fastening my own belt. ‘And I’m thrilled that you texted me.’

She smiled shyly. ‘You are?’

‘Of course.’

‘Oh, here –’ Reaching into the carrier bag, she withdrew a CD case and thrust it into my hands. ‘I made this for you.’

‘Uh, okay?’ I stared down at the CD case. ‘Thanks?’

‘You’re welcome. It’s a mixtape,’ she explained, face burning red. ‘Or a mix CD.’

I stared down at her handwriting on the case.

Shannon’s songs for Johnny.

Fuck me.

‘You look really nice,’ Shannon said, cheeks so hot I swear I could feel the heat radiating off them, as she gestured to my clothes. ‘And you smell great.’

‘Uh, thanks.’ I shifted in my seat, feeling a huge swell of relief.

‘I love your haircut,’ she added, reaching over to trail her fingers through it. ‘You kept the length on top.’ She hesitated and moved to pull her hand back but then settled it on my cheek. ‘You’re beautiful.’

A shiver rolled through me, her words hitting me deep, and I leaned across the seat. Jesus. ‘Come here.’ Tangling a hand in her hair, I pulled her face to mine, knowing that I was about to be plastered in lipstick but not giving a shite either way.

The moment my lips fused with hers, I was done for. Every coherent thought, plan, and notion I had for tonight went clean out the window when I felt her tongue sweep out to duel with mine. Shannon moaned into my mouth and the vibration against my lips caused the semi I’d been sporting to shoot to full mast. I heard the sound of a seatbelt clicking and then she was right there, scrambling over the seats to straddle my lap.

Jesus Christ, this girl was going to ruin me.

My hands moved of their own accord, clamping down on her hips to hold her still as I pushed against her, driving myself to the point of pain with the need I had to just bury myself inside this girl and never come back up for air.

‘Johnny?’ she gasped, breathing hard against my lips. ‘What do you want to do tonight?’

Jesus, that was such a loaded question with endless possibilities. She didn’t need to be giving me any notions. I needed basic instructions right now because I was in unknown territory and she was all I wanted to do.

‘I don’t know.’ Striving for self-control, I leaned back to look at her. ‘I was waiting to see what you wanted to do.’

‘I just want to be with you,’ she replied simply, placing her small hands on my chest and setting my body on fire. ‘I don’t care if we sit in this car all night.’

‘Do you want to go to the cinema?’ I offered, knowing that staying in the car all night was a dangerous idea – tempting, but very dangerous. ‘Or we could go to Biddies for a game of pool? Or Spizzico for dinner?’ I shrugged, feeling flustered. ‘Whatever you want.’

‘I…’ She glanced down at my chest before tipping her chin back up, eyes locked on mine. ‘I don’t want to go anywhere?’

Was that a question? ‘You don’t want to?’ I asked, uncertain. ‘Do you want to go home?’

‘No.’ Shannon shook her head. ‘Not…’ Her words broke off and she ducked her face again.

‘Not what, baby?’ I asked. ‘If you don’t tell me, I won’t know.’

‘I just want to be alone with you,’ she whispered, looking up at me through hooded eyes. ‘You know?’

I knew.

But I also knew that it was a terrible idea.

‘You want to go to my house?’ I asked, feeling my body ache with the pressure it was taking to take this slowly. I knew I needed to, but Christ, she wasn’t making it easy for me. ‘My room?’

She nodded. ‘If you do?’

Fuck.