Pretend your fingers are gently stirring soup
MY ENTIRE BODY IS BUZZING WITH ANTICIPATION ASย Iย STEP THROUGH THEย heavy
door into the locker room. The familiar scent of sweat and equipment greets my nostrils, but thereโs something else in the air. Faces light up when I enter, a few cheers erupting at the sight of me.
โLindley!โ Colson exclaims, coming up to greet me. โItโs about fuckinโ time.โ
Trager, Patrick, Austin, and a few others wander over, giving me manly side hugs and smacking my arm, welcoming me back. A lot of fanfare considering itโs just a regular morning practice.
I grin, genuinely touched by the reception. I make my way to my locker, where Iโm joined by Ryder and Beckett.
โGood to have you back,โ Ryder says gruffly. โGlad to be back.โ
Beckettโs already in his practice jersey and gear, so he sits on the bench while we get ready. โHowโs Diana?โ he asks somberly.
โBetter.โ My smile falters for a moment, because every time I think about my girlfriend lying in that hospital room, I feel sick to my stomach. โItโs been tough, but weโre getting through it.โ
My friends nod in understanding, a mixture of sympathy and support in their eyes.
โLet us know if she needs anything, mate,โ Beck says, his tone sincere. โThanks, man.โ
My chest is tight with emotion, so I twist toward my locker, pretending to search for something while I blink through my suddenly misty eyes. Jesus Christ. Iโm not going to cry in front of a room full of hockey players. Iโve already cried enough in front of Diana since I returned to Hastings.
But knowing my friends are here for me is soul soothing. This locker room is a brotherhood, and I feel that bond every time I walk in here. I know I can always lean on these guys, even obnoxious Trager, when times get tough.
โSheโs dying to get home,โ I say.
โWhen is she being discharged?โ Will asks from his locker.
โTomorrow morning, I think. The doctors are finally satisfied her kidney isnโt going to explode or something.โ
Ryder chuckles.
We finish dressing for practice, but before I can walk out into the tunnel, Coach Jensen intercepts me. He toys with the whistle dangling around his neck as he pulls me aside.
A mix of nerves and gratitude swirls in my gut as I wait for him to speak.
โWelcome back, Lindley,โ he says briskly. โI just wanted to check how your girl is doing.โ
โSheโs good. Thank you for asking.โ โAnd the asshole who did that to her?โ
โThey arrested him the night it happened, but heโs out on bail.โ Jensenโs eyes flash.
โI know,โ I say with a sigh. โBut heโs in Indiana now. His parents came to get him, and he was given permission to leave the state with them so long as he wore an ankle bracelet. But he was booked for the latest assault. He almost killed her, Coach. Nobodyโs letting him off easy. The DA says heโll do time.โ
โThey oughta throw away that key,โ Coach mutters. โAny man who raises his hand to a woman doesnโt deserve to see daylight.โ
I nod in agreement. โAnyway. Go join the men.โ
โCoach, wait. I just wanted to sayโฆโ I offer a sincere look. โI appreciate you giving me the time off to handle things.โ
To my shock, Jensen does something very un-Jensen-like. He places a hand on my shoulder in a comforting touch.
โHockeyโs important, Lindley, but so is life. Iโm here for you, and the teamโs here for you. You ever need to talk, come find me.โ
I swallow the lump in my throat, feeling the weight of my coachโs words. As I make my way down the tunnel, listening to the familiar sounds of my teammates warming up, I feel a renewed sense of purpose, and I know that wherever he is, my dad is watching over me.
After practice, I drive right back to the hospital to see Diana. I come armed with snacks and my laptop, so we can watch something better than the hospital channels. Iโve stayed true to my wordโI donโt plan on leaving her side until sheโs home.
Her face lights up the moment I walk into her room. Sheโs sitting up, wearing a white cardigan with green flowers, her blond hair around her shoulders. Despite the cut on her lip and the row of stitches on her temple, her cheeks have a healthy glow, and her eyes are bright.
Christ, I love this woman with all my heart. Being with Diana is like discovering a piece of myself that I never knew was missing. She makes me want to be the best version of myself, not because I feel like I have to impress her but because she inspires me to be better.
I donโt regret my time with Lynsey. I needed it in order to grow into who I am today. But man, I see the difference now. I see the importance of picking the right woman to do life with. Preferably someone who can make you laugh your ass off.
โHey,โ I say thickly. She smiles. โHey.โ
โWhereโs your mom?โ I ask.
Dianaโs mom flew in from New York the morning after the assault and has spent the past three mornings at her daughterโs bedside. Diana wasnโt wrong about her motherโs attitudeโI definitely see the pretentious side. But I can also tell she truly loves her daughter and is genuinely trying to connect with her. Thatโs all that matters.
โYou wonโt believe this,โ Diana answers. โShe went out for lunch with Dad and Larissa.โ
โWow.โ
Even I know thatโs progress. Dianaโs parents have barely spent two hours in the same room since they divorced ten years ago. But Iโve seen them chatting in the hospital cafeteria more than once since Diana was admitted. Her brother wanted to fly in as well, but Diana put her foot down and ordered him to stay in Peru.
I drag my usual chair over to her bedside. Sheโs allowed to leave tomorrow. Until then, Iโm spending yet another night in this hospital room. The nurses know better than to kick me out. Although I do plan on getting Adeline and Marge a nice gift basket for their patience and kindness. And maybe an extra-large basket for Dr. Lamina, the psychiatrist whoโs been seeing Diana every morning to help her work through the lingering anxiety over the assault.
โHow was practice?โ Diana asks.
โIt was good. Beckett was on fire. Canโt wait to see him unleash his inner goon on Yale this weekend.โ
I open the bag of snacks, reaching in for the bag of plain potato chips she requested. I hand them to her, and she smiles happily.
โAny updates about him and Will?โ she asks.
I roll my eyes. โBabe. Neither of them provides me with updates about their s*x lives.โ
โWell, they should. Iโm curious.โ
โIโll be sure to interrogate them tomorrow at practice about whether theyโve seen each otherโs penises lately,โ I promise.
โThank you.โ
I steal a handful of potato chips. โHowโs your pee?โ โBarely pink!โ Sheโs jubilant.
I snicker.
โHopefully the doctor clears me to return to practice soon.โ That summons a grin.
โWhat?โ she says defensively. โMy beautiful optimist.โ
โIt canโt takeย thatย long for a bruised kidney to recover,โ she argues. โTwo weeks, max.โ
โYour doctor said a month to be safe,โ I remind her.
โI donโt have a month. Weโre training for nationals. Theyโre in April!โ โItโs only January.โ I set the bag of chips aside and climb onto the bed,
stretching out beside her. โFocus on recovery. The squad will be there next month. And in the meantime, we can focus on the next project. Wanna practice our Spanish?โ
Yup, Iโve been recruited into learning it with her. So far, I know how to say, โI want to fuck you in the ass.โ Diana saw it in a Spanish porno once, so it was the first item on our vocab list. Which is ironic, considering weโre not even into anal. Hell, I donโt think she could handle my size even if we were.
โLater,โ Diana says, waving off the suggestion. โI want to give our other project another shot first.โ
I firmly shake my head. โNo way. We tried last night, and it hurt you.โ โJust donโt be so vigorous this time.โ
Itโs true. I might have gotten a bit overexcited when I fingered her in this bed last night. I ended up jostling her side pretty hard, and her resulting pain forced us to stop.
โPretend your fingers are gently stirring soup.โ I howl with laughter.
โQuiet,โ Diana chides. โOtherwise, Marge will pop in and lecture us for being too loud. We already have one Niall in our lives. I canโt deal with a second one.โ
โI still think we should set them up. Imagine the beautiful, silent life theyโd lead.โ
โDo we have to talk about this right now? I want to come,โ she whines, twisting her head to kiss my neck.
I gently roll her onto her back. โFine. Iโll pretend Iโm stirring soup. But only if I can grind against your leg and come in my pants.โ
โYouโre so romantic. Stop being so romantic.โ
I brush a kiss over her lips. โIโm obsessed with you, Dixon. I hope you know that. And not just because Iโve been sucked into your pussysand.โ
โMy pussy is powerful,โ she agrees.
I bring my mouth to her neck and suck gently. She shivers in response. โWait, did you lock the door?โ
โShit, no. One second.โ
I hop up to take care of it, and Iโm walking back to the bed when Dianaโs phone dings with an alert. She gasps the second she reads it.
โWhatโs wrong?โ I ask, instantly on guard.
โI have devastating news. Brace yourself, Lindley.โ โIโm braced.โ
โAccording to this, Zoey and the Connor broke up.โ
My eyebrows fly up. โWow. They only lasted, what, four months outside of the hacienda?โ
โI know,โ Diana moans. โItโs official. True love doesnโt exist.โ
I lie down beside her and bring her hand to my lips, brushing a kiss on her knuckles. โYouโre wrong,โ I say, my voice thick with emotion. โIt does.โ