The mood in the house this evening can only be described asย hostile flailing.
I can tell the exact moment when Mom starts listening to episode four, because sheโs suddenly calling everyone in town. I can only make out a few words as I creep past her bedroom door and down the stairs, wincing at every creakโโirresponsibleโ and โoutrageousโโbut the constant chatter never ends.
โI donโt know!โ Momโs voice is really loud now. โHe was so nice when I spoke to him, and now heโs acting like Don and I know everything. I did an entire interview with him months ago, told him anything he wanted to know, and he hasnโt aired a word of it!โ
I grab my purse from the counter and slip out the door. I need to be elsewhere just in case she realizes whoโs really to blame for all of this (me).
Dad is strolling up the front walk, sweat wilting the collar of his white shirt, and I almost run smack into him.
โYouโre in a hurry.โ He looks โฆ amused, which is unexpected, given Momโs mood. Even if heโs not listening to the podcast, thereโs no way she didnโt immediately text him upon starting todayโs episode.
โSorry.โ I step around him and say, โIโm going to Grandmaโs,โ even though I hadnโt actually decided on that. But it was what I always did, as a kid. Run away before the screaming gets too loud to ignore.
โLucy.โ
I stop and look back at him.
โIf youโve remembered something, and you want to talk to someone, you can still talk to me.โ
I open my mouth, but nothing comes out. Iโm not sure what I expected, but that wasnโt it.
โIโฆโ He sighs and slides his hands into his pockets. He looks sad, which is an emotion I havenโt seen in him in a long time. Iโve forgotten what he looks like when heโs not just a little bit scared. โMaybe I didnโt handle things right. I donโt know. But I meant what I said back then. Itโs okay.โ
โItโs okay.โ I could still see Dad, five years ago, tears in his eyes as he gripped my shoulders. โIf you remember something, you only tell me, okay? Whatever it is, itโs okay. I promise. But you can only tell me. Understand?โ
I remembered looking at him, at the hard set of his mouth, at the wild desperation in his eyes, and realizing that he thought I killed Savvy. He wasย sureย I killed Savvy, actually.
I guess five years hasnโt restored his faith in me. And who can blame him, honestly?
โDo you ever imagine bashing your parentsโ brains in? I thought about that a time or two. Thatโs normal, right?โ
โYouโll be my first call for sure,โ I say, and turn to walk to my car.
Listen for the Lie Podcast with Ben Owens
EPISODE 4โโTHE AMNESIA DEFENSEโ
Savannahโs mother, Ivy Harper, hadnโt mentioned anything about Kathleen Chase confessing to her that Lucy had killed Savannah in our first interview, so I went to talk to her again. I asked her about those days right after the murder.
Ben:ย Thanks for sitting down with me again.
Ivy:ย Sure.
Ben:ย Iโm trying to understand how Lucy became a suspect in Savannahโs murder. Can you walk me through it?
Ivy:ย I can try.
Ben:ย Did you see Lucy after Savannah died?
Ivy:ย Oh yes, of course.
Ben:ย When?
Ivy:ย We were at the hospital within ten minutes of her arriving. We wanted to find out what had happened to Savvy. They didnโt let us in, though. Not that day. We had to wait until the next day.
Ben:ย What happened when you went to see her?
Ivy:ย I begged her to tell me what had happened, but she just kept saying she didnโt remember. She was crying and crying โฆ I felt bad for her at the time, but I was also incredibly frustrated. This was the only person in the world who could tell me what happened to Savvy, and she was just blubbering.
Ben:ย Iโ Right. So. Did you ever see her again after that?
Ivy:ย Many times.
Ben:ย Many times?
Ivy:ย I thought that it was best for me to keep going over there, keep pushing and letting her see how upset I was.
Ben:ย You already thought she did it at this point?
Ivy:ย I had my suspicions. There were the scratches on Savvyโs arm and the bruising that Lucy couldnโt explain. Then people started coming forward saying they were fighting at the wedding. And every time I went over to talk to Lucy, she was just โฆ weird.
Ben:ย Weird?
Ivy:ย Hysterical. Just crying and shaking. It was odd, given that sheโs a pretty stoic girl most of the time.
Ben:ย Did you get the impression that she was having any problems from her head injury?
Ivy:ย What kinds of problems?
Ben:ย With traumatic brain injuries, people often have trouble creating memories in the same way. Especially short-term memories. It can last for a long time after the injury.
Ivy:ย I really donโt know.
Ben:ย Did Lucy seem confused? Did she keep forgetting things? Besides the incident, I mean.
Ivy:ย Hmmm โฆ she did, actually. Iโd go over there and sheโd start telling me all the things sheโd told me last time. I thought she just really wanted me to know.
Ben:ย But at the time, you didnโt think that the injury could account for Lucyโs odd behavior?ย Ivy:ย Maybe. I canโt recall exactly. But, honestly, it doesnโt matter either way. It was after I saw how Don and Kathleen were acting that I knew for sure it was Lucy.
Ben:ย How were they acting?
Ivy:ย Suspicious. Don would hover while I asked Lucy questions. Kathleen left us alone, but Don acted very weird every time I went over there. He was outright hostile at first.
Ben:ย Hostile?
Ivy:ย He told me I was upsetting Lucy, that sheโd been hurt too and I needed to wait to talk to her. Kathleen convinced him, but he would linger in the doorway and listen to everything. He never left us alone. I actually told the police about that.
Ben:ย About him lingering?
Ivy:ย Yeah. It struck me as โฆ someone trying to make sure that his daughter doesnโt say the wrong thing. He was treating her like she was a child again. I started to think that Lucy had told him something and he was trying to protect her by making sure she didnโt tell anyone else. And then I think that the guilt got to Kathleen, and she said something.
Ben:ย What did she say?
Ivy:ย [long sigh] You know, Iโve kept this to myself, because I donโt blame Kathleen and Don. I really donโt. But once, when I went over to their house, Kathleen followed me outside after I finished talking to Lucy. And she gave me this really long hug, and when we pulled away, she was crying, and she said, โJust wait a little longer, okay? Iโll make this right.โ