Five minutes to three oโclock, a forest green Mercedes Sprinter comes rolling up my driveway. Besides the fact I already know who this is because security at the front gate had to call me and clear her, this van screams Miller.
As does the way sheโs blaring music from the speakers and driving a little too fast for my liking. A fucking travel van. I bet the nomad herself lives in it too.
I was surprised when I got the call that she was here, but Iโm thankful she came back.
Miller parks, hops out of the driver side, and rounds the front.
โWhat the hell is that?โ I ask, arms crossed, leaning against a pillar on my front porch.
โThis old girl?โ She proudly pats the hood. โMy van.โ โYou have a van.โ
โYep. Live in it sometimes too.โ โOf course you do.โ
She mirrors my posture, leaning on her car with crossed arms, a peek of a smile tugging on her lips. Iโm sure she loves the satisfaction of knowing she can get under my skin with something as simple as not having a permanent residence, but I truly have no clue as to how someone could live so unattached.
Millerโs tanned and tatted arm glistens under the early July sun, the glint of light reflecting off her septum ring. Maxโs new nanny has yet to figure out the concept of a real shirt because, once again, sheโs only wearing some kind of strapless piece of fabric as a bra, almost like a bathing suit. Itโs flimsy and barely there, but the rust orange color looks nice underneath the denim one-piece.
โOveralls again, huh?โ
Sheโs got a different pair on, and this time theyโre baggy and full-length, covering her thighs I tend to daydream about.
โTheyโre easy.โ
โYou know who else wears onesies?โ I gesture to the baby monitor in my hand where a sleeping Max can be seen.
She huffs a laugh. โShut up.โ
โSeriously though, those seem like the biggest pain in the ass to take off.โ โSo, youโre thinking about taking them off of me?โ
โNoโโ
โAt least get me inside first, Baseball Daddy. Weโre in public.โ
I canโt help the small smile tilting on my lips as I lean my shoulder on the pillar, thankful sheโs up for bantering with me after what went down the other night.
Miller takes the steps leading up to my porch, bypassing me for the front door, but I gently grab her wrist to stop her, pulling her back until her chest bumps into mine.
My voice is low and sincere. โIโm sorry. About the other night.โ
Her gaze dips to my lips for a split second, but I catch the movement. I especially catch how she licks her own lips after looking at mine. โAnd?โ
โAnd thank you for coming back. I appreciate what youโre doing for us.
For me.โ โAnd?โ
โAnd . . . youโre good with Max.โ โAnd?โ
What the hell?ย โAnd . . . I donโt know what else you want me to say, but I am sorry for how overprotective Iโve been with him. Itโs just that heโs all Iโve got.โ
Millerโs set shoulders drop. โRemember that time you grabbed my tits?โ โOkay.โ Reaching around her, I grip the doorknob to usher her inside.
โGreat talk, Miller.โ
She puts her hand on mine, stopping me, her tone growing serious. โThat was your one fuck-up, Rhodes. Treat me like my presence is a burden to your summer again, and Iโll walk out this door and never come back.โ
A small smile tilts on my lips. โYes, maโam.โ
โDonโt smile. Youโre too old to be smiling. Youโre sure to get wrinkles just from doing it once.โ
Shaking my head, that grin grows as I open the door of my house for her.
She enters first and, from behind, I watch as she takes in the first glimpse of my home. I bought this place a few months ago, so there are still some boxes tucked in various corners, but overall, weโre moved in. The house is a nice size. Perfect for Max and me. Iโm not sure if Chicago is our long-term spot, but I like the idea of picking a place and setting roots. Especially now that I have a son. Once heโs old enough to start school, I donโt plan on moving him.
God, that thought is depressing. Heโs only fifteen months old and I already feel like Iโm missing out on too much time. What am I going to do when heโs too old to be traveling with the team? When heโs in school? Leave him in Chicago while I travel for work and hire someone else to raise him?
I want to be involved. I want to be a good dad. I want him to be surrounded with unconditional love from his family. The last thing I want is for him to feel the weight of too many responsibilities at too young of an age the way I did.
I want his life to be easy. At least, in a reasonable way. I want him to learn how to work hard, to earn things in his life. But the big stuff, like finding a way to get to school when you live across town, figuring out where your next meal will come from, or forging your dadโs signature on paperwork because you donโt want anyone to know you and your little brother live alone. Yeah, my kid will never know what thatโs like.
Rounding Millerโs body, I face her in the foyer. โMaxโs room is down that hall. Iโll let you explore on your own once heโs awake from his nap, but the main part of the house is this way.โ Hands in my pockets, I nod towards the opposite side of the house. โCome.โ
โGod,โ she moans, head falling back. โI canโt wait to hear you say that in the bedroom.โ
Jesus.
I wouldnโt know where to start figuring out how this womanโs mind works, how she makes these connections. She loves to throw me off balance, to get a rise out of me. But this is my house. Iโm in charge here, and Iโm tired of this twenty-five-year-old woman making me feel like a teenage boy with no retort for the pretty girl who spits out the most asinine statements.
Instead of backing up or shaking my head at her as I typically do, I take a step into her, invading her space before leaning down to keep my voice low
but clear. โIf youโre as terrible of a listener in the bedroom as you are in real life, Miller, I can promise you this, you wouldnโt be allowed to come.โ
Those pretty lips part, jade eyes wide.
โTwo can play this game, Montgomery. Now, letโs go.โ I nod towards the other side of the house once again.
Her lips press together, holding back a grin. โYou keep talking like that, Kai, and Iโll be ditching the โbaseballโ part and just be calling you โdaddyโ.โ
A laugh bursts out of me, a smile mirroring the one on Millerโs mouth.
Her eyes track my face as she stands only inches from me. It feels only slightly sexual, but more so satisfied. Like sheโs proud of herself for getting me to laugh.
โThanks for helping me out with him today,โ I add, needing to voice a bit of my appreciation for her coming back before she can leave the two inches that separate us.
She nods, following behind as I lead her through the other side of the house. Maxโs bedroom is in the furthest corner, done purposefully in hopes that heโd be able to sleep through whatever noise is happening in the main part.
โMy room is down that hall, as is a guest room. Living room. Dining room,โ I continue, rattling off the open spaces as we pass them. Turning the corner, we leave the main family room. โHereโs the kitchen, and if you come this way, youโll findโโ
I stop in my tracks, no longer hearing Millerโs sandaled feet slap against the hardwood. Her back is to me, eyes on the kitchen.
โThis is your kitchen?โ she asks. โYeah.โ
โKai, itโs stunning.โ
Is it? I guess it is, with its butcher block countertops and brand-new appliances. Thereโs plenty of storage, white cabinetry, and black finishes. But Iโve never thought much of it because I, for one, never use it.
โItโs what the contractor had picked out, but it works.โ
โIt works?โ she asks with a breathy laugh. โThis is my dream kitchen. Is that a convection oven?โ
โI have no idea.โ
She leaves her spot, opting to explore, her hands roaming over the electric buttons. โIt is.โ
Miller continues to open cabinets and drawers because of course she does. The woman wouldnโt know what a boundary was if she tripped and fell right over one.
She comes up empty in almost every drawer before continuing to the fridge. Itโs embarrassingly bare, but I just got back from a road trip so Iโll chalk up my lack of groceries to travel and ignore that Iโve been too exhausted to set up a grocery delivery or even go to the store myself.
โKai Rhodes,โ Miller gasps. โIs that beer in your fridge?โ
โWill it still be there by the time I get home, or should I plan on you emptying me out?โ
Miller glances at the stove to check the time. โItโll probably be there. Itโs after three. Too late in the day for my drinking habits.โ She closes the fridge, leaning on the counter next to it. โWould you mind if I borrowed your kitchen tonight?โ
I shrug. โGo for it. Just try not to burn my house down. And I uh . . . clearly donโt have much to cook with.โ
โI wonโt be cooking, but Iโll get some groceries delivered. Iโll get you stocked up too.โ
After how I treated her the other night, I figured Iโd have to be on my hands and knees to get her to watch my son again, but sheโs being surprisingly . . .ย pleasant.ย What the hell did Monty say to her?
โI mean, youโll be paying for it obviously,โ she continues.
โObviously,โ I chuckle. โIโd appreciate that. I havenโt had the time. Thereโs an emergency card you can use in that drawer.โ I point to the small drawer by her hip. โAs well as all the phone numbers you need. Maxโs pediatrician, local hospital, my buddy Ryanโs number is there if you need any help. He lives ten minutes down the road. I also laid out Maxโs nighttime routine. Heโs eating regular foods now as you know from the last time you watched him, but if he gives you any trouble while youโre putting him down, you can give him a bottle. I already prepped it for you. Just add water.โ
โSo organized, Baseball Daddy. I bet youโre one of those people who knows where their birth certificate is, arenโt you?โ
โYou donโt? Miller, thatโs something you should definitely know the location of.โ
This woman, who is about to be responsible for my child for the next two months, canโt even locate one extremely important piece of paper.
Max likes her. Sheโs Montyโs daughter.
โIโm going to need you to say something reassuring right now because Iโm about to leave a human in your hands and Iโm not having much faith.โ
โIโm fun.โ
I can feel one side of my mouth tugging upward. โIs that supposed to be reassuring?โ
โIโm also very good at poker.โ
โWell, thankfully my fifteen-month-old doesnโt have much money to his name.โ
She slides her palms against the counter. โAnd I look good in your kitchen.โ
I attempt to hold back, but fuck it, I like sparring with this woman. โThat you do.โ
Thereโs no question there. Miller looks damn good in my kitchen when I allow myself to look.
โDoes your boyfriend know what a flirt you are?โ
โOh, come on, Kai. Youโre better than that. Be direct. Ask me if Iโm single.โ Thereโs a sly smile on her lips, a smile that screams she likes flirting with me as much as I do her.
Thereโs something about Miller, something so fierce about her personality, that my gut knows loyalty is deeply ingrained in her. So, no, she wouldnโt be flirting with me if she had a boyfriend.
โNo need to ask. Iโve already got my answer.โ โOh yeah? And whatโs that?โ
I miss letting loose and flirting with a beautiful woman, remembering how easy life used to be, and Miller makes it pretty easy to get caught up in pretending I still have the freedom to be that man.
But I fucking donโt. Thereโs a kid in the next room reminding me of that.
I clear my throat, not answering her question. โCall security at the front gate when the groceries get here. Theyโll come and drop them off.โ
She looks around the room. โItโs fancy out here, Baseball Daddy.โ โItโs safe.โ
โGlad to know I donโt have to worry about anything dangerous getting in.โ
She might not have to worry, but I do. Because with Miller Montgomery, my coachโs daughter, standing in my kitchen looking likeย that, Iโm afraid something very dangerous has already gotten in.
These seats are the fucking worst.
Before I signed my contract last year, I shouldโve amended that the bullpen needed more comfortable chairs. Eight and a half innings and my ass is numb as I wait and watch for my team to pull out the W at home.
Isaiah is playing his ass off. His defense is tight and locked in. He hit a two-run homer in the fourth and another double in the seventh, bringing in a run and giving the Warriors a comfortable lead. I was going to invite him over after the game to have one of those beers that may or may not still be in my fridge, but with how well heโs doing, Mr. Popular is about to get a whole lot of attention heโs not going to want to pass up.
Itโs not that Iโm not a team player, but I hate bullpen days. Besides my forty pitches thrown to get my arm loose and active between my starts this week, I donโt do anything here other than watch.
We sit somewhere off the foul line for the entirety of the game when I could be sitting at home, spending time with my son. This is where it gets hard for me. On my starting nights, I can justify the time away, but nights like these, I wish Max were here too.
With my hat in my hands, I absentmindedly run my thumb over Maxโs picture. Itโs a habit, but also a good reminder when work becomes too much, none of it really matters. He does.
I love the game, I really do, but I love my son a whole lot more and I donโt know how to find that balance.
Maybe if his mom hadnโt left him the way she did Iโd be handling all of this a whole lot better. Iโd be more hands-off perhaps. But most of the time I feel like I need to overcompensate, to be both parents and just hope that Max doesnโt notice the gaps.
โAce.โ One of our relief pitchers pats me on the back. โI like this no- work thing. You think you can go another eight innings on your next start?โ
Chuckling, I lean back in my chair, crossing my arms. โIโll try my best.โ Taking a seat next to me, he offers me a bit of his chew, but I decline,
holding up my seeds instead.
โYour brother is going to be insufferable after tonight.โ โGod,โ I exhale. โTell me about it.โ
And right on cue, post-game in the training room with the music blaring, my little brother waltzes in like the arrogant fucker that he is.
Isaiah slowly unbuttons his uniform to the song, the jersey with his number nineteen falling to his still cleated feet. โIโm here, baby!โ
Lying back on a training table as I get my shoulder rubbed out, I watch, trying my best not to laugh. But itโs pretty difficult not to when heโs got the whole room on his side, cheering him on as he strips down to the music, high from our win and his personal game.
โRhodes, youโre on my table tonight,โ Kennedy, one of the trainers, says. โIโm rubbing you down.โ
Isaiah stops mid-dance, his eyes going wide with excitement because well, heโs in love with Kennedy.
โKenny . . . are you serious?โ He follows her to her table like a love sick puppy dog.
โYep. Strip down and hop up.โ
My brotherโs attention darts to me, his mouth hanging open but smiling at the same time. Kennedy rarely volunteers to work on Isaiah because the kid can be a colossal pain in the ass.
Looking at me, he points to her then to himself as if she has no idea how obsessed he is with her.
I canโt help but laugh at him from across the room, but then my doctorโs thumb digs into my rotator cuff and wipes my smile right off my face.
โIs this part of my reward for having a good game?โ Isaiah asks Kennedy as he strips down to nothing, his cup clattering to the floor. โJust how much are we talking here with this rub down?โ
โJesus, Rhodes.โ Kennedy turns away from him as quickly as possible, covering her eyes. โLeave your goddamn compression shorts on. This isnโt that kind of massage.โ She peeks over to me. โAce, what the hell is wrong with your brother?โ
โI wish I knew, Ken.โ
Isaiah uses both hands to quickly cover his dick while standing bare-ass naked next to Kennedyโs training table. โWell, you said to strip down and I got excited.โ
I motion to what heโs covering. โClearly.โ
The entire room falls into a fit of laughter. Isaiah pulls his shorts back on and hops onto the table with his stomach down and his calves exposed.
โI just thought,โ he continues. โFinally, my Kenny is going to realize Iโm the guy for her. After all these years and all this tension, it only took a two- run homer for her to open her eyes.โ
Kennedyโs voice has no inflection. โThereโs no tension.โ
Isaiah smirks, looking over his shoulder at her. โBaby, thereโs tension. You could cut it with a knife. Youโll see one day, Kenny. Youโre gonna want a real man, andย Iโmย a real man.โ
Kennedyโs elbow digs into Isaiahโs right calf.
โOh, holy fuck!โ he screams, biting into the padded table to muffle the sound. He lets out a strangled whimper, his voice cracking. โKenny! Kenny!โ
โThatโs it, baby. Let it out like a real man.โ
The entire room is in hysterics as my egotistical brother melts into the table, squirming to get away from her. โYou like hurting me?โ he asks, sitting up and getting out of her reach. โLittle do you know I like pain. Some might even call me a masochist in the bedroom.โ
Kennedy is trying her hardest to hold back her smile. Theyโve worked together for three years and my brother has tried his best to get her in his bed. It hasnโt worked. Though, the girl used to have a diamond on her left ring finger, and this season she doesnโt, so who knows, maybe thatโs reignited his determination.
โIf you like pain so much, get back on this table.โ She pats the cushion. โKenny, youโve had a long day. Iโm good. I donโt want you working too
hard.โ
She laughs, shaking her head and walking away. โWimp.โ
My doctor continues to stretch out my throwing arm as I speak to my brother. โYouโre going to drive her to quit one day.โ
โNah,โ Isaiah says, his voice growing louder as he walks to my table, looking down at me. โSheโs in love with me. She has absolutely no idea, but she is. And clearly, Iโm in love with her.โ
โClearly. Since you flaunt a new girl in your bed every night while staying in the same hotels as her.โ
Isaiah pops his shoulders. โWe have an understanding.โ I chuckle.
โIโm surprised you stayed for PT. I figured youโd be rushing home to get Max away from the hot nanny.โ
โYeah, well, Iโm trying to work onย loosening the reinsย per Millerโs request.โ
โWeโre taking requests from Miller now? Interesting.โ โSheโs not so bad, I guess.โ
Isaiahโs brows shoot up, a mischievous smirk on his lips. โSheโs not so bad, huh? Who are you and whereโs my overbearing big brother?โ
I use my free hand to flip him my middle finger.
โYou know, I was thinking, maybe I should come over tonight. Make sure Miller is okay. If she doesnโt like your house, she can stay at mine.โ
Kennedy walks by, shaking her head.
โAs a friend,โ Isaiah quickly adds for her to hear. โAs a friend, Kenny!โ โYouโre an idiot and sheโs not staying at my house.โ
โBut Maxโs nannies have always lived in your house.โ
โAnd Maxโs other nannies didnโt have a dad they could crash with who lives thirty minutes away.โ
They also didnโt look like Miller, talk like Miller, or have me wanting to flirt back with them every time they open their damn mouth. Additionally, they didnโt have my throwing hand putting in extra work while in the shower because flashes of her thick thighs and green eyes wonโt leave my fucking daydreams.