โDad, you donโt need to make up the couch. Iโm sleeping in my van tonight.โ
Bending to reach my toes, I stretch out my back, needing some relief after my twenty-hour road trip. The last thing I want to do after sitting for so long is to sleep on a couch. The mattress in my van is far more comfortable.
โYou can take my bed,โ he insists. โIโm not sleeping in your bed.โ
โAnd youโre not sleeping in your van in downtown Chicago.โ I exhale a resigned sigh. โCan we figure it out later?โ
โFine. How was your drive?โ โGood. Easy.โ
โAnd how long are you staying in town?โ
I knew that was coming, but anything I have to say, he wonโt want to hear. I only decided to drive up to Chicago from Miami to placate him, but my original plans of slowly making my way out to the West Coast are back on. Heโs going to be spending most days at the field or in other cities for games, so whatโs the point in sitting around Chicago if Iโm not traveling with him to help with Max?
He rounds the kitchen in his apartment, pulling out a few ingredients even though he knows two minutes into him cooking, Iโll be the one taking over. Emmett Montgomery is great at a lot of things. Cooking is not one of them.
โWant to talk about what happened the other night?โ he asks. โNope.โ
โOkay. Letโs talk about it anyway.โ
โKaiโs too much,โ I quickly blurt. โThat guy has no chill whatsoever.โ
My dadโs back vibrates in a chuckle as he stands over the stove, cracking eggs into a pan.
Without hesitation, I follow.
โYou should stick to coaching,โ I tell him, fishing out a few eggshells before they cook into the whites.
โYou should be grateful Iโm terrible in the kitchen. Itโs the reason youโre doing something so amazing with your life. The cover ofย Food & Wineย magazine, Millie? Incredible.โ
His voice drips with pride as it always does, but Iโm trying not to think too much about the article or the award I just won. I need to get back into the kitchen and practice without anyone breathing down my neck.
Itโs probably for the best that Kai is too difficult to help. I have other things I need to focus on.
I grab the spatula from him, officially taking over. โCan we talk about something other than baking?โ
โSure. Letโs talk about Kai.โ โSmooth.โ
โWhat happened the other night?โ
I shoot him a pointed glance. โI just want to let you know that you have terrible taste in people because your favorite player is the worst. He told me he didnโt want to get to know me after I spent the entire day taking care of his son.โ
Then proceeded to call my phone countless times, but I havenโt listened to the voicemails. I assume they were forced by my dad, and I donโt need to hear his coerced apologies.
Grabbing some fruit from the fridge, I cut it up, keeping an eye on our eggs while throwing a couple slices of bread into the toaster, diving right back into taking care of him the way I did growing up.
โHeโs a little protective,โ my dad admits. โUnderstatement of the year.โ
โAnd heโs used to doing everything on his own. He practically raised his brother and heโs only two years older than Isaiah.โ
Wait. What?
My attention darts to him, but I quickly avert it. He loves Kai and for my own pettiness, I donโt want to learn why.
โHeโs got a lot of pressure on him, Miller. Heโs Maxโs only parent and heโs maybe the best pitcher Iโve ever seen, let alone coached. The MLB life is almost impossible to live when youโre a single dad.โ
Without knowing, those words fall onto my chest, sitting heavy. Iโve carried them around for years, all too aware of what he gave up for me.
My dad was also in the majors before I came along, but unlike Kai, the second he became a single parent, he left the league. He settled in a small town in Colorado. Coached at a shitty college with an almost non-existent budget. Stayed when the bigger offers started rolling in. Raised me on his own. Was home every night. Made it to every school function, every one of my softball games.
All the while he was talented enough to make millions of dollars playing a game he loves. But instead, he gave it up because of me.
โHe needs your help, Miller. He doesnโt know how to ask for it and Iโm not sure if he knows how to accept it, but if thereโs anyone who could bulldoze their way in, itโs you.โ
I burst a laugh. โIโm not sure thatโs the compliment youโre intending, Dad.โ
โI donโt want him calling it and retiring early.โ
The hits keep coming. He doesnโt want Kai to give up his life for Max the way he had to give up his life for me.
Clearing my throat, I plate our breakfasts and meet him at the table. โWhereโs Maxโs mom?โ
โNo idea. Last fall, right before playoffs, she showed up out of nowhere, left Max at Kaiโs place, and a couple of days later she skipped town. Didnโt want any part of her kid.โ
โShit,โ I exhale.
โHe tried to retire the next day,โ my dad continues. โCame to my office, told me what happened, and asked what kinds of fines he was looking at for breaking his contract early. We were about to go into the playoffs, and he was ready to walk just like that.โ He snaps his fingers. โNo hesitation in taking on this whole new responsibility.โ
That makes me dislike him a little bit less. And it makes his overprotective, overly annoying parenting style make a whole lot more sense. Max didnโt have anyone and suddenly, Kai stepped up, ready to be his everything.
It reminds me of the man sitting across the table from me.
โI canโt spend my summer with someone like that, Dad. Heโs unbearably uptight. The guy has no idea how to chill the fuck out.โ
โHeโs a good man, Miller. Good heart, takes care of his family. He just needs a reminder that he has to take care of himself sometimes too. And if thereโs anyone who knows how to let loose and have a good time, itโs you. Maybe thatโll rub off on him.โ
โYou want me to rub up on him?โ โOff,ย Miller. I said โoff.โ โ
I pop my shoulder. โI like my version better.โ
โMillie,โ he begins, setting his fork down. โPlease, for me, give him another chance. Kai needs your help. He might not say it, might not fully realize it yet, but youโll be good for him. Both of them.โ
Fuck my life.ย This man, who has given up so much for me, knows I canโt say no to him.
โYou want me to force myself into their lives when he told me he didnโt want to know anything about me?โ
โYes.โ
I huff a laugh. โIโll think about it.โ
A moment of silence passes between us, unspoken words lingering in the air before my dad finally breaks the silence and speaks them out loud.
โIf you decide to stay, have fun. Make him have fun, take care of his boy, but donโt forget that youโre leaving at the end of the summer, okay? Kai is grounded and attached, and he has a good reason to be. But you, my girl, are the most no-strings person I know.โ
โYouโre just full of compliments today, arenโt you,โ I joke, but heโs right. I always leave, knowing I wonโt have to deal with the sting of homesickness when I go. At least for anyone but him.
โIn a way, Kai is lucky,โ he continues. โThat he doesnโt miss Maxโs mom, and that Max wonโt remember her when heโs older. But the stakes are a lot higher when kids are involved. Take care of them, but donโt give them someone to miss.โ
Heโs asking a lot of a girl who, up until ten minutes ago, was contemplating leaving town at her earliest convenience.
โDad, that was a very long, drawn-out way for you to tell me not to have sex with your pitcher.โ
โWell, my way sounded a whole lot more poetic than that, but yeah, donโt have sex with my pitcher.โ