walking _ away from Lana is almost impossible. I almost broke down and stayed, but I couldn’t do that with either of them, no matter how much I wanted to hold her tight to my chest and whisper in her ear until she fell asleep.
Instead, I lie alone in my bed, sexually and emotionally frustrated.
Are you really surprised?
No. A part of me knew the moment I walked out the door that she wouldn’t follow me. It was written all over her face. Indecision. Uncertainty. The fear that anything we did could lead to more.
Of course, I want it. I wouldn’t have done what I did if I wasn’t sure of the fact that I want her any way I can get her, so as long as she is open to the same.
Give it time.
I rub my stubble-covered chin with my hand. The smell of Lana’s arousal lingers on my fingers, making my already stiff penis ache with the need to release. She pushed the band of my sweatpants down and wrapped my hand around my cock, giving it a single tug.
Just a little something to ease the edge , I tell myself as I pump up and down until the precum runs down.
my shaft, helping my hand glide more easily over the smooth skin.
It’s better than drinking , I repeat twice as my stomach clenches and my toes flex at the pleasure building at the base of my spine. The heat travels to my penis, making it impossible for me to think about anything other than seeking my own pleasure.
I imagine Lana’s fingers replacing mine. The provocation of her touch. Her tight grip on her hand wrapping around my shaft, pumping until my balls tighten. The warmth of her mouth replacing her hand, teasing and probing until I’m bucking beneath her, choking her on my cock.
I can imagine it all vividly.
His eyes water as he takes all of me.
Me pushing my cock as far as it can go before cumming down her throat.
The taste of my release on her tongue as I pull her to me and kiss her until we are both ready for me to sink inside her.
My spine tingles and my pump becomes more erratic. With a few more tugs, my cock explodes, covering my shirt.
I close my eyes tightly and curse myself. Any peace I thought I might feel quickly fades when I imagine Lana cleaning my cock with the flat of her tongue.
“Fuck,” I say in a rough voice.
So much for taking the edge off.
***
The next morning, Lana wakes up very early to take Cami to the lake. I consider joining them so I can talk to her about last night, but decide it would be best to talk to her once Cami is asleep.
I spend the next hour reviewing the DreamStream app while scrolling through Reddit, gathering information about the app and what people really think of it. Thanks to Lana’s insight and the data I collected, I have a good understanding of the app and its competitors.
Do you want to talk about DreamStream sometime? I have a couple of
ideas.
I text Rowan before I lose my trust.
Rowan
I’m free in thirty. I will send you a video call link. My brother and I jumped on the call thirty minutes later. Zahra shows up to say hello. Rowan’s eyes light up as he looks at her as she talks to me.
Damn. Love suits my brother. I’m happy he found someone who can make him look so happy all the time.
Once Zahra leaves, he and I get to work. DreamStream was my brother’s baby before he became the director of Dreamland. I’m surprised he didn’t step in to help. since they’re fighting, but given how busy he is with the park and Zahra, it makes sense. You don’t have time to get involved in other divisions of the company.
So are you the next best option?
The seed of doubt is planted in my head, but I do my best to ignore it.
The more I talk to Rowan about my evaluation, the more enthusiastic and confident I become about everything.
“You really thought this through.” Rowan looks at the camera.
“It was hard to fall asleep last night.” That’s a euphemism. It took me hours to knock out Lana after all, so the best I could do was try to distract myself with DreamStream.
“What do you suggest we do?” She leans back in his office chair. “I think we need an update.”
“How is that?”
“I’m pretty sure the guy you named grew up with a black and white TV that had five channels, so what does he know about streaming?”
“Long enough to have lasted so long at work.” She clasps her hands under her chin.
It’s been stumbling around and you know it. The numbers are not in our favor, and the slow decline dates back to shortly after you left office.” “So what do you think is better?” Her lips curve upward. “Ask the board to appoint another person who really knows what he is doing.”
“Like you?”
A laugh explodes out of me. I wait for Rowan to follow me, but his face remains stone cold.
“You’re serious?” My smile falls. “Why not?”
“Because I am very unqualified and equally uninterested in a position like that.” The thought of spending the rest of my days chained to a desk does not spark any joy.
“I’m not suggesting you become a CEO.” “And?”
“A director.”
I hold back my laughter this time.
His eyebrows furrow. “I’m being serious. I heard there are some problems with the current director in charge of content strategy and analysis.”
“AND?”
“You could try”.
I shake my head so hard my neck hurts. “Hell no”. “Why not?”
“First of all, I have no experience.” He crossed my finger.
So much for being a risk taker.
My teeth grind as my grandfather’s old nickname for me pops into my head. This is not the time to take risks.
Rowan readjusts his already perfect tie. “Then start as an associate.” “I hate office jobs.”
“DreamStream is different.”
“Why? Because they have break rooms and beanbags? It’s tough. “I’m talking more about philosophy.”
I give him a blank look.
He sighs. “Just think about it.”
“There is nothing to think about because I am not looking for work. I just wanted to share what I found.”
“Then be sure to mention it at the next board meeting. “I’m sure Mr. Wheeler will be open to suggestions if this month’s report is even bleaker than the last.”
“Rowan…” I warn him. The last thing I want to do is draw attention to myself given my lack of experience and the gigantic expectations associated with my last name.
“If you don’t want to join a team that can make a difference, at least tell the person who can.” He hangs up before giving me a chance to say anything else.
“Idiot.”
 |
Turns out I don’t have to look for Lana. She comes knocking on my bedroom door with a baby monitor in her hand and a closed expression on her face.
“Do you want to take a little walk around the lake?” He asks quietly as if he hasn’t spent most of the day avoiding me.
My heart beats harder against my chest. “Of course. Let me grab a pair of slippers.”
Once I have my shoes tied, I follow Lana out of the house and into the summer night. For the first few minutes, neither of them says anything. Crickets fill the silence as we walk toward the dock behind the guesthouse. It is a much smaller version of the
the main house, intended mainly for a single boat and a couple of chairs at the end.
We both took a seat at the end of the dock. Lana takes off her flip-flops and swings her legs over the edge of them so the tips of her toes can brush the water.
“So…” I start because clearly he won’t.
His eyes flicker from the lake to my face. “What do you have planned after we sell the house?”
The air in my lungs stops. “That?” “Do you think you’ll go back to Chicago?”
“Would you mind if I leave?”
He looks at his toes running through the water. “Should not”. My eyes narrow. “That’s not a real answer.”
His eyes roll. “Nor answer my question with another question.”
My lips curve into a small smile. “True. To be honest, I’m not sure what I have planned after selling the house. I didn’t really think that far ahead.”
“Of course you didn’t. It must be nice not to have a job or any responsibilities outside of living in the moment.”
My smile falls. “He’s a bit of a loner.”
She snorts. “What? How is that possible? You have a billion friends.
“ I had a bajillion friends. Turns out a lot of them were either too toxic to be around or too fed up with my shitty coping mechanisms.”
His eyebrows knit together as if he can’t understand what I’m saying. “Iris-“
“She’s busy starting her life with my brother.”
“So? That doesn’t mean I can’t spend time with you.
“She does, but we can’t hang out as much as we used to. And that’s fine. “I understand things are different now.”
His head tilts. “Different like?”
I look up at the starry sky to avoid its discerning gaze. “I don’t expect him to stop living his life just because I don’t have one.”
“You have one life,” she replies.
A bitter laugh escapes me. “Empty one.” “What do you mean?”
“I’m a nobody, Lana.”
“You are someone to me.” Her hand grips mine.
You are someone to me.
His words act like medicine, sinking into my skin and easing the pain of years of damage from feeling inadequate.
“Do you really mean that?” scratch.
His head barely moves as he nods.
“Why didn’t you ask me to stay last night?” I ask the question I’ve been beating myself up about ever since.
“Because I was scared,” she admits, her voice barely audible over the leaves rustling around us from a strong gust of wind.
“Afraid of what?” I give his hand a squeeze. “A lot of things when it comes to you.”
That response from Lana. “Choose one.”
“I’m afraid of what will happen once you leave again.” “What if I stay?” The question springs from me without hesitation.
Smooth, Cal.
She blinks. “That?”
“I’m not in a hurry to go anywhere, so what if I stay?” Lake Wisteria for a while?
His forehead pinches. “Why would you do that?”
“Isn’t the answer obvious?” She tucked the flowing strand of hair behind her ear before tracing the soft curve. Her breathing changes as she looks at me with her big brown eyes that reflect the moon above us.
Her lips part, and I find the thought of kissing her impossible to ignore. I lean forward and capture her mouth with mine, swallowing her gasp.
The kiss ends as quickly as it started, but she’s breathing heavily like she’s just run a race.
“Do you want to stay?” The words rush out of her mouth. “Only if you want me to—”
She initiates the kiss this time, cutting off the last part of my sentence with her mouth pressing against mine. The buzz starts at my lips and travels down my spine.
Kissing Lana feels like the world starts spinning again. Like she’d been frozen in place until she re-entered my life, bending me over her shaft.
I’m not sure how long we kissed. At some point, she pulls away to straddle my lap. We both moan as she grinds herself against my cock. Her head falls to the side, so I kiss my way up to her neck, teasing her until she ends up rocking back and forth against me.
Everything about our kiss feels different. New. hopeful _
And I want to make sure that hope never dies. No matter what it costs.
