The _ smells and laughter coming from the kitchen wake me up much sooner than I would like. Merlin seems to agree with the way he darts under the bed at the sound of a pot making noise, leaving me alone.
I stumbled out of my room while rubbing my eyes. “Hey.” “Tomorrow!” Cami jumps off her stool to come hug my legs. Her polka dot apron is covered in the same red, sticky substance as her fingers, leaving a good stain on my sweatpants. Red, white and blue star clips hold her wild hair back from her face.
“What’s going on?” He covered my mouth to yawn.
“Mommy is going to kick Missy’s ass.” Cami extends her fist for her to hit him.
Lana shoots Cami a look over her shoulder. “Camila”.
The boy shrugs his shoulders. “What did I say?” “I told you not to repeat that to anyone.”
“Oopsy daisy.” Cami sticks her tongue out from the space between her teeth. “Who is Missy?” Asked.
Lana turns her attention to the stove. “My competition.”
“Boo!” Cami makes a great show of rejecting her thumbs. I choke on a laugh. “Competition why?”
“The 4th of July baking contest,” Cami answers for her as she steals a strawberry from a large bowl. “You come?”
Shit. I completely forgot that baking still existed. It’s been a long time since I celebrated the 4th of July the Wisteria Lake way, with the town gathering at the lakeside park for a barbecue and fireworks show.
I run a hand through my messy hair. “I do not think.” If I learned anything from last week’s Strawberry Festival, it’s that spending time in the city only increases my anxiety. So the only way I can limit my alcohol consumption and keep Lana happy is if I avoid stressors.
“Oh.” Cami’s shoulders droop.
I’m sorry boy. This is for the best.
I walk over to the stove and look over Lana’s shoulder. “What are you doing?”
Drop a single drop of red food coloring into the jar of strawberries. “Something that will make Missy regret ever thinking she could copy my strawberry tres leches cake recipe and get away with it.”
My mouth opens. Damn, competitive Lana is hot as hell.
“Do you need any help?” I tuck a lock of his hair behind his ear, making sure to run my fingers along the curved slope of his neck before pulling away.
His agitation stops as his breathing quickens. “Thanks for the offer, but I’m almost done.”
“How long have you been at this?” I fill a glass with water and take a sip.
“Five in the morning”
“Really? You’re going to fall asleep before you get to the baking competition.”
She gives me a pointed look. “I can sleep when I’m dead.” “Would you like to be buried with your trophy?”
She smiles. “Absolutely. That and whatever tissue Missy uses to dry her tears after losing.
“This side of you is hot but kind of scary.” Her smile is all teeth.
Even though Lana said she didn’t need my help, I decide to help with the overwhelming amount of dishes falling from the sink.
Cami keeps the conversation going while stealing strawberries every time she thinks Lana isn’t looking. The red fruit juice around her mouth is a dead giveaway, so she wiped it away while her mother’s back was turned.
The doorbell has all three of us looking up. “Do we have a doorbell?” Lana stops her mixer.
“That’s the first time I’ve heard it. Are you waiting for anyone? Asked.
She shakes her head. “You’re not?”
“Most people hate me, so I’m going to say no.”
Lana looks at her half-mixed whipped cream. “Do you mind checking who she is?”
“I have it!” Cami jumps off her stool.
“Camila!” Lana rounds the corner, but I’m closer.
Cami rises on the tips of her toes to reach for the latch, only to be dragged into my arms.
“I don’t think it’s a good idea.” Cami pouts.
I take a look through the peephole. Lana’s sister, Antonella, walks a few meters away. Her tanned skin looks paler than normal, and her fine hair hangs lifelessly around her face, accentuating a sharp bone structure that can only be achieved with malnutrition.
“Shit.”
Cami takes a breath.
I left her. “My wallet is on my nightstand. If you count all my bills correctly, I will let you keep them all.”
His eyes open. “Actually?”
“Yes. But you have to stay in my room until I come get you.” “Okay!” Cami squeals as she goes to my room.
Lana abandons her whipped cream. “What happen?” “Your sister is outside.”
Lana’s mouth opens. Is Antonella here? Her face pales. “Oh Lord.”
“You didn’t know she was coming.”
His head shakes. “No. I think I made myself clear during our last phone call.
“Do you want me to see what she wants?”
His hardened gaze stops at the door. “I already know what she came here for.
My eyebrows draw together. “But-“
His shoulders slump. Let me go talk to her. I stand in her way. “Wool”.
She doesn’t look at me, so I tilt her head back. “You want to talk with her?”
His head shakes slightly. “Not really after she…” “After she what?”
“ I took the last bit of the inheritance money I had.”
Shit. “She stole you?” Her eyes fall. “Yeah.”
“Is that why she’s back? To get more money? “Probably.”
“Do you want me to give him some?”
His teeth sink into his bottom lip as he shakes his head again.
“Then what do you want to do?”
“I don’t know. After the way she talked to me on the phone… I hate seeing her that way. I hate it so much, knowing that she’s struggling and there’s nothing I can do to make it better.” Her voice cracks.
My heart feels like Lana is wrapping her fist around it and squeezing it. You have done everything you can to help her.
“So why isn’t it enough to help her stay clean? I have done everything, paying, praying, begging, but she always comes back.” There’s a sparkle in her eyes that wasn’t present before.
“It has nothing to do with you.” I wrap my arms around her.
She places her head against my chest with a huff. “I’m so fucking tired of people hurting me.”
The tightness in my chest becomes unbearable. “I’m sorry.” For me. For Anto. And for everyone who caused him pain in the first place.
The doorbell rings again, followed by loud knocks. Lana shudders against me.
I kiss the top of her head. Let me go talk to her. “But-“
“Let me do this for you.”
She sighs as I release my grip around her body. “Stay inside.” I reach for the doorknob. “California?”
I look at her over my shoulder. She twists the fabric of her apron. “Thank you.” “He would do anything for you.”
His bottom lip wobbles. “I know.”
I bow my head before walking outside. Antonella tugs on the sleeves of her long-sleeved shirt as if she could hide the footprint marks on her skin. She looks thinner than ever, with bones sticking out from under her shirt and brown eyes almost bulging out of their sockets.
“What the hell are you doing here?” she snaps. “Antonella. “It’s been a while.”
She scoffs. “Don’t tell me my little sister accepted you.” “That’s not your concern.”
“Like hell it isn’t.” She tries to walk around me, but I block her way.
“Get out of my way.” She speaks through clenched teeth. “No.”
“I need to talk to Alana.”
I give my head a hard shake. “I don’t think it’s a good idea.” “Because you said so?” Her frown deepens.
“Because you’re hung up.”
Looking into his beady eyes feels like I’ve been thrown back in time. If anyone understands Antonella’s desperation for her next fix, it’s me. Going through my own shit made me aware of the darkness
and the self-loathing that festers just beneath the surface, waiting to be unleashed.
“As if you were one to judge. Lana told me all about your problem with Oxy. She almost broke my sister when she realized that the man she loved let her down like everyone else.”
His blow lands its intended mark right on my heart.
You’re not that guy anymore.
Change tactics before losing your cool. “I can get you the help you need.”
There is a certain sparkle in his eyes. “You like money?”
“Like rehab, therapy and whatever you need to get a clean start.” I put my hands in the pockets of my sweatshirt.
His head shakes. “I just wanted a place to stay and some money to get back on my feet.”
“I can go to the motel and book you a room or I can take you to a facility and cover the cost, but I’m not going to give you cash.” Doing so would only enable her addiction and hurt Lana even more, neither of which is acceptable to me.
His head shakes, sending his fine hair flying. “I never want to go to a facility again.”
I look at the marks on his arms. “That’s the only way you’re going to be able to handle that.”
He tugs at his sleeves again.
I try one last time. “If you decide otherwise, all you need to do is call me and I can take you somewhere where they can help you get better. I haven’t changed my number.
His head shakes. “I am not ready.”
“I understand.” Much more than I feel comfortable acknowledging. As much as I hate to admit it, I understand Antonella and her decisions in a way that Lana never can. Having an addiction is not easy to accept, much less treat.
“If you understood me, then you would help me.” Her tone rises, reminding me a lot of Lana when she gets angry.
“I offer to help. Just not the way you want. Her gaze hardens. Fuck you Cal.
My lips press together.
The cuticle is torn, causing the skin to bleed. “Just let me see my sister. I… Shit. Her head hangs. “Last time I was here, I did some bad things and I want to apologize.”
“Not like that, Antonella. You of all people should know how much it hurts him to see you like this.
She looks away. “Good.”
“Do you want me to book you a room at the motel?”
“Hell no. “I’m going to fall asleep on the couch of a friend who lives a few towns away.” His hair flies because he shakes his head so hard.
“If that’s what you want. Just know that I meant what I said. If you need help, all you have to do is call me. But if you come back here not clean, I’ll make sure you never see your sister again.”
He turns to his ramshackle car packed to the ceiling with boxes and personal belongings. It’s sad to see the mess of his life. she has converted.
I wish I could help her, but first and foremost I need to protect Lana.
 |
I check on Cami before slamming my fist against the closed bathroom door. “Wool?”
“It is gone?”
“Yes. I waited until his car drove away before I got back in.”
“Thank you.” Her snort is soft but audible, making my muscles tense.
My hand chokes the doorknob. “Open for me.” “I’d rather not.”
Please .
His heavy sigh is followed by the movement of the lock. I open the door and find Lana sitting on the floor with her arms around her legs.
“Hey.” I kneel next to hers and pull her into my arms. “She’s going to be fine.”
“I thought you’d be used to this by now.” Her fingers wrap around the cotton fabric of my shirt.
“Used to what?”
“The disappointment.” Her chin trembles.
“I’m sorry.” The words come rushing out of my mouth.
She shifts her gaze to the ground. “It’s not your fault that Antonella is the way she is.” “No, it’s not. But I’m sorry for being another person who lets you get down because she was too selfish to do anything else.
Some of the tension bleeds from his muscles as he lets out a deep sigh.
“Seeing your sister… shit. “I understand her and where she is coming from, but I also want to shake her for hurting you and Cami like she has.”
Her nails dig into my skin. “Does being grateful that she gave up Cami make me a bad person?”
“No, Lana. It makes you human.” My arms around her tighten. “Antonella is not fit to care for a child. And you… were born to be the mother of that girl.
She looks at me with tear-soaked eyelashes and glassy eyes. “You think?”
“I have never been more sure of anything.”
