WE ENDED UP ON THE BEACH AGAIN, WANDERING AIMlessly. Jacob was still full of himself for engineering my escape.
โDo you think theyโll come looking for you?โ he asked, sounding hopeful.
โNo.โ I was certain about that. โTheyโre going to be furious with me tonight, though.โ
He picked up a rock and chucked it into the waves. โDonโt go back, then,โ he suggested again.
โCharlie would love that,โ I said sarcastically. โI bet he wouldnโt mind.โ
I didnโt answer. Jacob was probably right, and that made me grind my teeth together. Charlieโs blatant preference for my Quileute friends was so unfair. I wondered if he would feel the same if he knew the choice was really between vampires and werewolves.
โSo whatโs the latest pack scandal?โ I asked lightly.
Jacob skidded to a halt, and he stared down at me with shocked eyes. โWhat? That was a joke.โ
โOh.โ He looked away.
I waited for him to start walking again, but he seemed lost in thought. โIsย there a scandal?โ I wondered.
Jacob chuckled once. โI forget what itโs like, not having everyone know everything all the time. Having a quiet, private place inside my head.โ
We walked along the stony beach quietly for a few minutes.
โSo what is it?โ I finally asked. โThat everyone in your head already knows?โ
He hesitated for a moment, as if he werenโt sure how much he was going to tell me. Then he sighed and said, โQuil imprinted. Thatโs three now. The rest of us are starting to get worried. Maybe itโs more common than the stories say. . . .โ He frowned, and then turned to stare at me. He gazed into my eyes without speaking, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration.
โWhat are you staring at?โ I asked, feeling self-conscious. He sighed. โNothing.โ
Jacob started walking again. Without seeming to think about it, he reached out and took my hand. We paced silently across the rocks.
I thought of how we must look walking hand and hand down the beach
โ like a couple, certainly โ and wondered if I should object. But this was the way it had always been with Jacob. . . . No reason to get worked up about it now.
โWhy is Quilโs imprinting such a scandal?โ I asked when it didnโt look like he was going to go on. โIs it because heโs the newest one?โ
โThat doesnโt have anything to do with it.โ โThen whatโs the problem?โ
โItโs another one of those legend things. I wonder when weโre going to stop being surprised that theyโreย allย true?โ he muttered to himself.
โAre you going to tell me? Or do I have to guess?โ
โYouโd never get it right. See, Quil hasnโt been hanging out with us, you know, until just recently. So he hadnโt been around Emilyโs place much.โ
โQuil imprinted on Emily, too?โ I gasped.
โNo! I told you not to guess. Emily had her two nieces down for a visit
. . . and Quil met Claire.โ
He didnโt continue. I thought about that for a moment.
โEmily doesnโt want her niece with a werewolf? Thatโs a little hypocritical,โ I said.
But I could understand why she of all people might feel that way. I thought again of the long scars that marred her face and extended all the way down her right arm. Sam had lost control just once when he was standing too close to her. Once was all it took. . . . Iโd seen the pain in Samโs eyes when he looked at what heโd done to Emily. I could understand why Emily might want to protect her niece from that.
โWould you please stop guessing? Youโre way off. Emily doesnโt mind that part, itโs just, well, a little early.โ
โWhat do you meanย early?โ
Jacob appraised me with narrowed eyes. โTry not to be judgmental, okay?โ
I nodded cautiously.
โClaire is two,โ Jacob told me.
Rain started to fall. I blinked furiously as the drops pelted my face.
Jacob waited in silence. He wore no jacket, as usual; the rain left a spatter of dark spots on his black T-shirt, and dripped through his shaggy hair. His face was expressionless as he watched mine.
โQuil . . . imprinted . . . with aย two-year-old?โ I was finally able to ask. โIt happens.โ Jacob shrugged. He bent to grab another rock and sent it
flying out into the bay. โOr so the stories say.โ โBut sheโs a baby,โ I protested.
He looked at me with dark amusement. โQuilโs not getting any older,โ he reminded me, a bit of acid in his tone. โHeโll just have to be patient for a few decades.โ
โI . . . donโt know what to say.โ
I was trying my hardest not to be critical, but, in truth, I was horrified. Until now, nothing about the werewolves had bothered me since the day Iโd found out they werenโt committing the murders Iโd suspected them of.
โYouโre making judgments,โ he accused. โI can see it on your face.โ โSorry,โ I muttered. โBut it sounds really creepy.โ
โItโs not like that; youโve got it all wrong,โ Jacob defended his friend, suddenly vehement. โIโve seen what itโs like, through his eyes. Thereโs nothingย romanticย about it at all, not for Quil, not now.โ He took a deep breath, frustrated. โItโs so hard to describe. Itโs not like love at first sight, really. Itโs more like . . . gravity moves. When you seeย her,ย suddenly itโs not the earth holding you here anymore. She does. And nothing matters more than her. And you would do anything for her, be anything for her You
become whatever she needs you to be, whether thatโs a protector, or a lover, or a friend, or a brother.
โQuil will be the best, kindest big brother any kid ever had. There isnโt a toddler on the planet that will be more carefully looked after than that little girl will be. And then, when sheโs older and needs a friend, heโll be
more understanding, trustworthy, and reliable than anyone else she knows. And then, when sheโs grown up, theyโll be as happy as Emily and Sam.โ A strange, bitter edge sharpened his tone at the very end, when he spoke of Sam.
โDoesnโt Claire get a choice here?โ
โOf course. But why wouldnโt she choose him, in the end? Heโll be her perfect match. Like he was designed for her alone.โ
We walked in silence for a moment, till I paused to toss a rock toward the ocean. It fell to the beach several meters short. Jacob laughed at me.
โWe canโt all be freakishly strong,โ I muttered. He sighed.
โWhen do you think it will happen for you?โ I asked quietly. His answer was flat and immediate. โNever.โ
โItโs not something you can control, is it?โ
He was silent for a few minutes. Unconsciously, we both walked slower, barely moving at all.
โItโs not supposed to be,โ he admitted. โBut you have toย seeย her โ the one thatโs supposedly meant for you.โ
โAnd you think that if you havenโt seen her yet, then sheโs not out there?โ I asked skeptically. โJacob, you havenโt really seen much of the world โ less than me, even.โ
โNo, I havenโt,โ he said in a low voice. He looked at my face with suddenly piercing eyes. โBut Iโll never see anyone else, Bella. I only see you. Even when I close my eyes and try to see something else. Ask Quil or Embry. It drives them all crazy.โ
I dropped my eyes to the rocks.
We werenโt walking anymore. The only sound was of the waves beating against the shore. I couldnโt hear the rain over their roar.
โMaybe Iโd better go home,โ I whispered.
โNo!โ he protested, surprised by this conclusion.
I looked up at him again, and his eyes were anxious now.
โYou have the whole day off, right? The bloodsucker wonโt be home
yet.โ
I glared at him.
โNo offense intended,โ he said quickly.
โYes, I have the whole day. But, Jake . . .โ
He held up his hands. โSorry,โ he apologized. โI wonโt be like that anymore. Iโll just be Jacob.โ
I sighed. โBut if thatโs what youโreย thinkingย . . .โ
โDonโt worry about me,โ he insisted, smiling with deliberate cheer, too brightly. โI know what Iโm doing. Just tell me if Iโm upsetting you.โ
โI donโt know โ
โCโmon, Bella. Letโs go back to the house and get our bikes. Youโve got to ride a motorcycle regularly to keep it in tune.โ
โI really donโt think Iโm allowed.โ
โBy who? Charlie or the blood โ orย him?โ โBoth.โ
Jacob grinnedย myย grin, and he was suddenly the Jacob I missed the most, sunny and warm.
I couldnโt help grinning back.
The rain softened, turned to mist. โI wonโt tell anyone,โ he promised. โExcept every one of your friends.โ
He shook his head soberly and raised his right hand. โI promise not to think about it.โ
I laughed. โIf I get hurt, it was because I tripped.โ โWhatever you say.โ
We rode our motorcycles on the back roads around La Push until the rain made them too muddy and Jacob insisted that he was going to pass out if he didnโt eat soon. Billy greeted me easily when we got to the house, as if my sudden reappearance meant nothing more complicated than that Iโd wanted to spend the day with my friend. After we ate the sandwiches Jacob made, we went out to the garage and I helped him clean up the bikes. I hadnโt been here in months โ since Edward had returned โ but there was no sense of import to it. It was just another afternoon in the garage.
โThis is nice,โ I commented when he pulled the warm sodas from the grocery bag. โIโve missed this place.โ
He smiled, looking around at the plastic sheds bolted together over our heads. โYeah, I can understand that. All the splendor of the Taj Mahal, without the inconvenience and expense of traveling to India.โ
โTo Washingtonโs little Taj Mahal,โ I toasted, holding up my can. He touched his can to mine.
โDo you remember last Valentineโs Day? I think that was the last time you were here โ the last time when things were still . . . normal, I mean.โ
I laughed. โOf course I remember. I traded a lifetime of servitude for a box of conversation hearts. Thatโs not something Iโm likely to forget.โ
He laughed with me. โThatโs right. Hmm, servitude. Iโll have to think of something good.โ Then he sighed. โIt feels like it was years ago. Another era. A happier one.โ
I couldnโt agree with him. This was my happy era now. But I was surprised to realize how many things I missed from my own personal dark ages. I stared through the opening at the murky forest. The rain had picked up again, but it was warm in the little garage, sitting next to Jacob. He was as good as a furnace.
His fingers brushed my hand. โThings have really changed.โ
โYeah,โ I said, and then I reached out and patted the back tire of my bike. โCharlieย usedย to like me. I hope Billy doesnโt say anything about today โ I bit my lip.
โHe wonโt. He doesnโt get worked up about things the way Charlie does. Hey, I never did apologize officially for that stupid move with the bike. Iโm real sorry about ratting you out to Charlie. I wish I hadnโt.โ
I rolled my eyes. โMe, too.โ โIโm really, really sorry.โ
He looked at me hopefully, his wet, tangled black hair sticking up in every direction around his pleading face.
โOh, fine! Youโre forgiven.โ โThanks, Bells!โ
We grinned at each other for a second, and then his face clouded over. โYou know that day, when I brought the bike over . . . Iโve been
wanting to ask you something,โ he said slowly. โBut also . . . not wanting to.โ
I held very still โ a reaction to stress. It was a habit Iโd picked up from Edward.
โWere you just being stubborn because you were mad at me, or were you really serious?โ he whispered.
โAbout what?โ I whispered back, though I was sure I knew what he meant.
He glared at me. โYou know. When you said it was none of my business . . . if โ if he bit you.โ He cringed visibly at the end.
โJake . . .โ My throat felt swollen. I couldnโt finish.
He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. โWere you serious?โ He was trembling just slightly. His eyes stayed closed.
โYes,โ I whispered.
Jacob inhaled, slow and deep. โI guess I knew that.โ I stared at his face, waiting for his eyes to open.
โYou know what this will mean?โ He demanded suddenly. โYou do understand that, donโt you? What will happen if they break the treaty?โ
โWeโll leave first,โ I said in a small voice.
His eyes flashed open, their black depths full of anger and pain. โThere wasnโt a geographic limit to the treaty, Bella. Our great-grandfathers only agreed to keep the peace because the Cullens swore that they were different, that humans werenโt in danger from them. They promised they would never kill or change anyone ever again. If they go back on their word, the treaty is meaningless, and they are no different than any other vampires. Once thatโs established, when we find them again โโ
โBut, Jake, didnโt you break the treaty already?โ I asked, grasping at straws. โWasnโt part of it that you not tell people about the vampires? And you told me. So isnโt the treaty sort of moot, anyhow?โ
Jacob didnโt like the reminder; the pain in his eyes hardened into animosity. โYeah, I broke the treaty โ back before I believed any of it. And Iโm sure they were informed of that.โ He glared sourly at my forehead, not meeting my shamed gaze. โBut itโs not like that gives them a freebie or anything. Thereโs no fault for a fault. They have only one option if they object to what I did. The same option weโll have when they break the treaty: to attack. To start the war.โ
He made it sound so inevitable. I shuddered. โJake, it doesnโt have to be that way.โ
His teeth ground together. โItย isย that way.โ
The silence after his declaration felt very loud.
โWill you never forgive me, Jacob?โ I whispered. As soon as I said the words, I wished I hadnโt. I didnโt want to hear his answer.
โYou wonโt be Bella anymore,โ he told me. โMy friend wonโt exist.
Thereโll be no one to forgive.โ
โThat sounds like aย no,โ I whispered.
We faced each other for an endless moment. โIs this goodbye then, Jake?โ
He blinked rapidly, his fierce expression melting in surprise. โWhy?
We still have a few years. Canโt we be friends until weโre out of time?โ
โYears? No, Jake, not years.โ I shook my head, and laughed once without humor. โWeeksย is more accurate.โ
I was not expecting his reaction.
He was suddenly on his feet, and there was a loudย popย as the soda can exploded in his hand. Soda flew everywhere, soaking me, like it was spraying from a hose.
โJake!โ I started to complain, but I fell silent when I realized that his whole body was quivering with anger. He glared at me wildly, a growling sound building in his chest.
I froze in place, too shocked to remember how to move.
The shaking rolled through him, getting faster, until it looked like he was vibrating. His shape blurred. . . .
And then Jacob gritted his teeth together, and the growling stopped. He squeezed his eyes tight in concentration; the quivering slowed until only his hands were shaking.
โWeeks,โ Jacob said in a flat monotone. I couldnโt respond; I was still frozen.
He opened his eyes. They were beyond fury now.
โHeโs going to change you into a filthy bloodsucker in just a few
weeks!โ Jacob hissed through his teeth.
Too stunned to take offense at his words, I just nodded mutely. His face turned green under the russet skin.
โOf course, Jake,โ I whispered after a long minute of silence. โHeโsย seventeen,ย Jacob. And I get closer to nineteen every day. Besides, whatโs the point in waiting? Heโs all I want. What else can I do?โ
Iโd meant that as a rhetorical question.
His words cracked like snaps of a whip. โAnything. Anything else.
Youโd be better off dead. Iโd rather you were.โ
I recoiled like heโd slapped me. It hurt worse than if he had.
And then, as the pain shot through me, my own temper burst into flame.
โMaybe youโll get lucky,โ I said bleakly, lurching to my feet. โMaybe Iโll get hit by a truck on my way back.โ
I grabbed my motorcycle and pushed it out into the rain. He didnโt move as I passed him. As soon as I was on the small, muddy path, I climbed on and kicked the bike to life. The rear tire spit a fountain of mud toward the garage, and I hoped that it hit him.
I got absolutely soaked as I sped across the slick highway toward the Cullensโ house. The wind felt like it was freezing the rain against my skin, and my teeth were chattering before I was halfway there.
Motorcycles were too impractical for Washington. I would sell the stupid thing first chance I got.
I walked the bike into the Cullensโ cavernous garage and was unsurprised to find Alice waiting for me, perched lightly on the hood of her Porsche. Alice stroked the glossy yellow paint.
โI havenโt even had a chance to drive it.โ She sighed. โSorry,โ I spit through my rattling teeth.
โYou look like you could use a hot shower,โ she said, offhand, as she sprang lightly to her feet.
โYep.โ
She pursed her lips, taking in my expression carefully. โDo you want to talk about it?โ
โNope.โ
She nodded in assent, but her eyes were raging with curiosity. โDo you want to go to Olympia tonight?โ
โNot really. Canโt I go home?โ She grimaced.
โNever mind, Alice,โ I said. โIโll stay if it makes things easier for you.โ
โThanks,โ she sighed in relief.
I went to bed early that night, curling up on his sofa again.
It was still dark when I woke. I was groggy, but I knew it wasnโt near morning yet. My eyes closed, and I stretched, rolling over. It took me a second before I realized that the movement should have dumped me onto the floor. And that I was much too comfortable.
I rolled back over, trying to see. It was darker than last night โ the clouds were too thick for the moon to shine through.
โSorry,โ he murmured so softly that his voice was part of the darkness. โI didnโt mean to wake you.โ
I tensed, waiting for the fury โ both his and mine โ but it was only quiet and calm in the darkness of his room. I could almost taste the sweetness of reunion in the air, a separate fragrance from the perfume of his breath; the emptiness when we were apart left its own bitter aftertaste, something I didnโt consciously notice until it was removed.
There was no friction in the space between us. The stillness was peaceful โ not like the calm before the tempest, but like a clear night untouched by even the dream of a storm.
And I didnโt care that I was supposed to be angry with him. I didnโt care that I was supposed to be angry with everyone. I reached out for him, found his hands in the darkness, and pulled myself closer to him. His arms encircled me, cradling me to his chest. My lips searched, hunting along his throat, to his chin, till I finally found his lips.
Edward kissed me softly for a moment, and then he chuckled.
โI was all braced for the wrath that was going to put grizzlies to shame, and this is what I get? I should infuriate you more often.โ
โGive me a minute to work up to it,โ I teased, kissing him again.
โIโll wait as long as you want,โ he whispered against my lips. His fingers knotted in my hair.
My breath was becoming uneven. โMaybe in the morning.โ โWhatever you prefer.โ
โWelcome home,โ I said while his cold lips pressed under my jaw. โIโm glad you came back.โ
โThatโs a very good thing.โ
โMmm,โ I agreed, tightening my arms around his neck.
His hand curved around my elbow, moving slowly down my arm, across my ribs and over my waist, tracing along my hip and down my leg, around my knee. He paused there, his hand curling around my calf. He pulled my leg up suddenly, hitching it around his hip.
I stopped breathing. This wasnโt the kind of thing he usually allowed. Despite his cold hands, I felt suddenly warm. His lips moved in the hollow at the base of my throat.
โNot to bring on the ire prematurely,โ he whispered, โbut do you mind telling me what it is about this bed that you object to?โ
Before I could answer, before I could even concentrate enough to make sense of his words, he rolled to the side, pulling me on top of him. He held my face in his hands, angling it up so that his mouth could reach my throat. My breathing was too loud โ it was almost embarrassing, but I couldnโt care quite enough to be ashamed.
โThe bed?โ he asked again. โIย think itโs nice.โ โItโs unnecessary,โ I managed to gasp.
He pulled my face back to his, and my lips shaped themselves around his. Slowly this time, he rolled till he hovered over me. He held himself carefully so that I felt none of his weight, but I could feel the cool marble of his body press against mine. My heart was hammering so loudly that it was hard to hear his quiet laughter.
โThatโs debatable,โ he disagreed. โThis would be difficult on a couch.โ Cold as ice, his tongue lightly traced the shape of my lips.
My head was spinning โ the air was coming too fast and shallow. โDid you change your mind?โ I asked breathlessly. Maybe heโd
rethought all his careful rules. Maybe there was more significance to this bed than Iโd originally guessed. My heart pounded almost painfully as I waited for his answer.
Edward sighed, rolling back so that we were on our sides again. โDonโt be ridiculous, Bella,โ he said, disapproval strong in his voice
โ clearly, he understood what I meant. โI was just trying to illustrate the benefits of the bed you donโt seem to like. Donโt get carried away.โ
โToo late,โ I muttered. โAnd I like the bed,โ I added.
โGood.โ I could hear the smile in his voice as he kissed my forehead. โI do, too.โ
โBut I still think itโs unnecessary,โ I continued. โIf weโre not going to get carried away, whatโs the point?โ
He sighed again. โFor the hundredth time, Bella โ itโs too dangerous.โ โI like danger,โ I insisted.
โI know.โ There was a sour edge to his voice, and I realized that he would have seen the motorcycle in the garage.
โIโll tell you whatโs dangerous,โ I said quickly, before he could move to a new topic of discussion. โIโm going to spontaneously combust one of these days โ and youโll have no one but yourself to blame.โ
He started to push me away.
โWhat are you doing?โ I objected, clinging to him.
โProtecting you from combustion. If this too much for you. โ
โI can handle it,โ I insisted.
He let me worm myself back into the circle of his arms.
โIโm sorry I gave you the wrong impression,โ he said. โI didnโt mean to make you unhappy. That wasnโt nice.โ
โActually, it was very, very nice.โ
He took a deep breath. โArenโt you tired? I should let you sleep.โ
โNo, Iโm not. I donโt mind if you want to give me the wrong impression again.โ
โThatโs probably a bad idea. Youโre not the only one who gets carried away.โ
โYes, I am,โ I grumbled.
He chuckled. โYou have no idea, Bella. It doesnโt help that you are so eager to undermine my self-control, either.โ
โIโm not going to apologize for that.โ โCanย Iย apologize?โ
โFor what?โ
โYou were angry with me, remember?โ โOh, that.โ
โIโm sorry. I was wrong. Itโs much easier to have the proper perspective when I have you safelyย here.โ His arms tightened around me. โI go a little berserk when I try to leave you. I donโt think Iโll go so far again. Itโs not worth it.โ
I smiled. โDidnโt you find any mountain lions?โ
โYes, I did, actually. Still not worth the anxiety. Iโm sorry I had Alice hold you hostage, though. That was a bad idea.โ
โYes,โ I agreed.
โI wonโt do it again.โ
โOkay,โ I said easily. He was already forgiven. โBut slumber parties do have their advantages. . . .โ I curled myself closer to him, pressing my lips into the indentation over his collarbone. โYouย can hold me hostage any time you want.โ
โMmm,โ he sighed. โI may take you up on that.โ โSo is it my turn now?โ
โYour turn?โ his voice was confused.
โTo apologize.โ
โWhat do you have to apologize for?โ โArenโt you mad at me?โ I asked blankly. โNo.โ
It sounded like he really meant it.
I felt my eyebrows pull together. โDidnโt you see Alice when you got home?โ
โYes โ why?โ
โAre you going to take her Porsche back?โ โOf course not. It was a gift.โ
I wished I could see his expression. His voice sounded as if Iโd insulted him.
โDonโt you want to know what I did?โ I asked, starting to be puzzled by his apparent lack of concern.
I felt him shrug. โIโm always interested in everything you do โ but you donโt have to tell me unless you want to.โ
โBut I went to La Push.โ โI know.โ
โAnd I ditched school.โ โSo did I.โ
I stared toward the sound of his voice, tracing his features with my fingers, trying to understand his mood. โWhere did all this tolerance come from?โ I demanded.
He sighed.
โI decided that you were right. My problem before was more about my
. . . prejudice against werewolves than anything else. Iโm going to try to be more reasonable and trust your judgment. If you say itโs safe, then Iโll believe you.โ
โWow.โ
โAnd . . . most importantly . . . Iโm not willing to let this drive a wedge between us.โ
I rested my head against his chest and closed my eyes, totally content. โSo,โ he murmured in a casual tone. โDid you make plans to go back
to La Push again soon?โ
I didnโt answer. His question brought back the memory of Jacobโs words, and my throat was suddenly tight.
He misread my silence and the tension in my body.
โJust so that I can make my own plans,โ he explained quickly. โI donโt want you to feel like you have to hurry back because Iโm sitting around waiting for you.โ
โNo,โ I said in a voice that sounded strange to me. โI donโt have plans go back.โ
โOh. You donโt have to do that for me.โ
โI donโt think Iโm welcome anymore,โ I whispered.
โDid you run over someoneโs cat?โ he asked lightly. I knew he didnโt want to force the story out of me, but I could hear the curiosity burning behind his words.
โNo.โ I took a deep breath, and then mumbled quickly through the explanation. โI thought Jacob would have realized . . . I didnโt think it would surprise him.โ
Edward waited while I hesitated.
โHe wasnโt expecting . . . that it was so soon.โ โAh,โ Edward said quietly.
โHe said heโd rather see me dead.โ My voice broke on the last word.
Edward was too still for a moment, controlling whatever reaction he didnโt want me to see.
Then he crushed me gently to his chest. โIโm so sorry.โ โI thought youโd be glad,โ I whispered.
โGlad over something thatโs hurt you?โ he murmured into my hair. โI donโt think so, Bella.โ
I sighed and relaxed, fitting myself to the stone shape of him. But he was motionless again, tense.
โWhatโs wrong?โ I asked. โItโs nothing.โ
โYou can tell me.โ
He paused for a minute. โIt might make you angry.โ โI still want to know.โ
He sighed. โI could quite literally kill him for saying that to you. I
wantย to.โ
I laughed halfheartedly. โI guess itโs a good thing youโve got so much self-control.โ
โI could slip.โ His tone was thoughtful.
โIf youโre going to have a lapse in control, I can think of a better place for it.โ I reached for his face, trying to pull myself up to kiss him. His arms held me tighter, restraining.
He sighed. โMust I always be the responsible one?โ
I grinned in the darkness. โNo. Let me be in charge of responsibility for a few minutes . . . or hours.โ
โGoodnight, Bella.โ
โWait โ there was something else I wanted to ask you about.โ โWhatโs that?โ
โI was talking to Rosalie last night. โ
His body tensed again. โYes. She was thinking about that when I got in. She gave you quite a lot to consider, didnโt she?โ
His voice was anxious, and I realized that he thought I wanted to talk about the reasons Rosalieโd given me for staying human. But I was interested in something much more pressing.
โShe told me a little bit . . . about the time your family lived in Denali.โ
There was a short pause; this beginning took him by surprise. โYes?โ
โShe mentioned something about a bunch of female vampires and
you.โ
He didnโt answer, though I waited for a long moment.
โDonโt worry,โ I said, after the silence had grown uncomfortable. โShe told me you didnโt . . . show any preference. But I was just wondering, you know, if any ofย themย had. Shown a preference for you, I mean.โ
Again he said nothing.
โWhich one?โ I asked, trying to keep my voice casual, and not quite managing. โOr was there more than one?โ
No answer. I wished I could see his face, so I could try to guess what this silence meant.
โAlice will tell me,โ I said. โIโll go ask her right now.โ
His arms tightened; I was unable to squirm even an inch away.
โItโs late,โ he said. His voice had a little edge to it that was something new. Sort of nervous, maybe a little embarrassed. โBesides, I think Alice stepped out. โ
โItโs bad,โ I guessed. โItโs really bad, isnโt it?โ I started to panic, my heart accelerating as I imagined the gorgeous immortal rival Iโd never
realized I had.
โCalm down, Bella,โ he said, kissing the tip of my nose. โYouโre being absurd.โ
โAm I? Then why wonโt you tell me?โ
โBecause thereโs nothing to tell. Youโre blowing this wildly out of proportion.โ
โWhich one?โ I insisted.
He sighed. โTanya expressed a little interest. I let her know, in a very courteous, gentlemanly fashion, that I did not return that interest. End of story.โ
I kept my voice as even as possible. โTell me something โ what does Tanya look like?โ
โJust like the rest of us โ white skin, gold eyes,โ he answered too quickly.
โAnd, of course, extraordinarily beautiful.โ I felt him shrug.
โI suppose, to human eyes,โ he said, indifferent. โYou know what, though?โ
โWhat?โ My voice was petulant.
He put his lips right to my ear; his cold breath tickled. โI prefer brunettes.โ
โSheโs a blonde. That figures.โ โStrawberry blonde โ not at all my type.โ
I thought about that for a while, trying to concentrate as his lips moved slowly along my cheek, down my throat, and back up again. He made the circuit three times before I spoke.
โIย guessย thatโs okay, then,โ I decided.
โHmm,โ he whispered against my skin. โYouโre quite adorable when youโre jealous. Itโs surprisingly enjoyable.โ
I scowled into the darkness.
โItโs late,โ he said again, murmuring, almost crooning now, his voice smoother than silk. โSleep, my Bella. Dream happy dreams. You are the only one who has ever touched my heart. It will always be yours. Sleep, my only love.โ
He started to hum my lullaby, and I knew it was only a matter of time till I succumbed, so I closed my eyes and snuggled closer into his chest.