Scorched bricks and splintered wood litter theย oor, and remnants of smoke form a haze around the one remaining torch in this part of the Hold. Guards removed the bodies a while ago, but they havenโt returned.ย ๎ขis part of the Hold isnโt usable, and Iโm sure they think Iโm long gone.
Allisander is. He didnโt lastย ve minutes.
Iโm glad. I donโt want him here. I donโt want anyone here.
When we walked in, the prisoners were bound on the ground. For a moment, I thought both men were dead, because their faces were black with soot and their clothes were charred.ย ๎ขe scent of burnedย esh was sickly sweet in the small space. It was obvious why theyโd been caught so quickly.
๎ขey probably hadnโt made it out of the Hold.
But then I saw the rise and fall of oneโs chest, and the other made a pathetic keening sound.
Allisander was right behind me.
I wished they were dead. I wished theyโd escaped. I wished Harristan would call a halt to all of this, instead of leaving me to prove how vicious we could be. I wished I were Wes, free to help, instead of Corrick, trapped by circumstance.
I wished. I wished. I wished.
All the while, Allisander was waiting.
Iโm not usually the one with the blade or the arrow or the ax. I give the order and someone else provides the action. But tonight my thoughts were wild and scattered and if I opened my mouth to give an order, I worried Iโd unravel everything my brother has worked so hard to hold together instead.
So I took a blade from the guard and cut their throats.
I held the weapon out for the guard to take it, but I kept my eyes on the consul. โSatisย ed?โ I asked him. My voice was rough, my hands sticky with
blood.
He was breathing hard, his nostrilsย aring like a panicked horse. Maybe he didnโt expect me to be so quickโor so brutal. Maybe he expected me to shy away from the violence.
โYes,โ he said.
โGood.โ
๎ขen he was gone, and the guards were dragging the bodies out.
Iโm sitting in the dust against the wall now. My hands are dark with dried blood, thick and black around myย ngernails.ย ๎ขe air feels thin and hard to breatheโbut maybe thatโs my chest, which has been gripped with dread since the moment I heard Tessa cry out for me to stop.
Here, you can only be Prince Corrick. You can only be the Kingโs Justice. I know, Quint. I know.
I press myย ngers into my eyes. As always, I envy Harristan. Not for his throne, but for his ignorance of all this. His distance. His privilege.
Maybe thatโs the same thing.
I keep telling myself that at least eight of them escaped, so it was only two. I keep telling myself that these men wouldnโt have lived much longer. I keep telling myself that what I just o๏ฌered was aย mercy, not cruelty, but I donโt know for sure.
I wish my head would empty itself of thoughts, that I could wrap my mind up in the darkness that lets me be who I need to be. Every time I try, I think of Tessa, her eyes dark with censure.
Sheโll never forgive me. Sheโll never let me touch her again.
Iโll never be free of this. Of who I am.ย ๎ขis will be my life as Kingโs Justice: Cruel Corrick, the most feared man in the kingdom, and somehow also the most alone.
I want to sco๏ฌ, but to my shock, my eyes prick and burn. I blink hard and swipe at my face.ย ๎ขis is ridiculous. I havenโt cried since the day our parents died. I donโt want to cry now.
A tear falls anyway. I drag a sleeve across my face. Itโs damp, and I realize Iโm dragging blood across my cheek.
I bring nightmares to life, I said to Tessa. Iโm very likely the living equivalent.
Somewhere in the darkness, a boot scrapes against the stoneย oor, and I jerk my head up. One of the guards must be returning.
I scramble to my feet. Swipe at my face again. Grit my teeth against everything I feel.
A new thought enters my brain, almost worse than the sorrow and dread. Prisoners escaped.ย ๎ขere was an attack on the Hold.ย ๎ขis might be someone other than guards. I reach for my blade automatically.
Itโs not there. I gave it to Tessa.
Alarm chases away the anguish. I grab a rock from the rubble and pull back into the shadows, peering through the hazy dimness, wondering if Iโve been very foolish in remaining here.
But then the light strikes a bit of silver and the shine of a black boot, and I recognize the palace guard uniform. I recognize Rocco, one of my brotherโs personal guards.
My breath catches. Has Harristan come looking for me? Heโs come here, to the Hold?
Relief hits me so fast and sudden itโs like a blast of wintry wind against all the hot sorrow. I nearly leap out of the shadows. For once, I wonโt be alone here. I wonโt be alone in . . . this.
I drop the rock and start forward. I donโt know what Iโm going to do, but so much emotion has clawed its way up my throat that Iโm worried Iโm going to fall on my knees, clutch at my brotherโs hands, and beg for a release from all this.
But itโs not my brother following the guard.
I stop short. My heart feels like it wants to explode from my chest. Every muscle tenses.ย ๎ขat cool wind of relief turns into a hot wash of shame and vulnerability.
Tessa has stopped short, too, and I can tell from the shi๎ย in her expression that I was right: I am a living nightmare. Her lips part and her eyes widen and she sucks in a breath. โOh,โ she whispers. โOh no.โ
I want to be indi๏ฌerent. I want to not care. I want so much that I canโt have.
I look at the guard. โShe shouldnโt be here,โ I say viciously. โWhy would you bring her here?โ
โI asked him to,โ says Tessaโand for theย rst time, her voice isnโt full of censure, itโs . . . mollifying. She steps toward me.
I step back. I keep my glareย xed on Rocco. โTake her back to the palace.
Now.โ
โNo.โ Tessa steps forward again. โJustโโ
โStop.โ I pull back again. I canโt meet her eyes. โYou shouldnโt be here.โ โPlease. Itโll beโโ
โGo,โ I snap. โOr Iโll lock you down here forever.โ โNo, you wonโt.โ
She reaches for me, and I jerk away. My boot catches on that rock I dropped, and I stumble back, tripping over a splintered beam of wood. My shoulders slam into the wall, and myย ngers curl intoย sts. Iโm breathing hard like a cornered animal.
She has the good sense to stop pursuing me. We stand there in the
ickering torchlight. Her hair is loose over her shoulders, her face clean- scrubbed, her clothes so simple Iโm surprised she found them in her closet.
Iโm wearing the sameย ne jacket I wore to dinner, but every inch of me is streaked with dirt and soaked in blood.
โNo illusions now,โ I say.
โNo,โ she agrees, her voice even.
I glance at Rocco whoโs waiting not far behind her. โHow did you get him to bring you here?โ
โI asked him toย nd you.โ
โWhere is Harristan?โ I look at the guard, and a new worry lances my heart. โWhy arenโt you with the king? What has happened?โ
โHis Majesty ordered that I attend to Miss Tessa,โ he says impassively. โYour brother isย ne,โ says Tessa, and her voice is careful. Again, sheโs seen
through me. โHe had a coughingย t a๎er you le๎, but he doesnโtโโ I push o๏ฌย the wall. โHeย what?โ
โHeโsย ne. No fever. I gave him some tea with honey and vallis lilies.โ Her hand closes on my forearm and gives a gentle squeeze. โHeโsย ne.โ
Something about her touch forces me still. My breathing slows fractionally.
Her eyes are piercing, though, and I worry sheโs going to ask what Iโve done. Sheโll ask, and Iโll tell her, and Iโll destroy any remainingย ickers of . . . whatever is between us.
I was ready to kneel at my brotherโs feet and beg for release. Iโm ready to kneel at Tessaโs and beg forgiveness.
She slides her hand down my forearm and laces herย ngers with mine. She doesnโtย inch at the blood. My chest tightens at the thought of her
touching it.
Please, I think.ย Please donโt ask.ย Please donโt hate me anymore.
I hate myself enough.
I start to pull away, to draw back into the dark and shadows. Her grip on my hand forces me still.
โWalk with me?โ she says.
I inhale to refuse. I want to sit in the dark and pray for the earth to swallow me whole.
Instead, I nod. She leads and I follow, and we step out of the crumbling bloodstained room and into the bright lights of the Royal Sector.
